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Waiting 2 months TTC and struggling !

(136 Posts)
MrsMeow2019 Sun 23-Jun-19 10:41:16

Dear All,

This is my first post, been thinking about TTC since January. DH and I agreed to start in August but as it turns out we have a family weeding next year and if we were lucky in August I’d be far too prego to go ans wouldn’t want to miss said wedding. Sorry for the waffle anyway this means waiting till September ... which is only 2 months ago but feels like forever.

I’ve got lots of social events to keen me busy, could do with losing half a stone, have started folic acid/ vit D and am due my smear test the first week of September. So really the waits makes sense.

But I’m almost 34 and getting increasingly worried about possible problems and how long it will take. Aside from the fact that I feel super broody and just want to try yesterday 😆.

Any other crazy ladies out there to join the wait ?

AndddddHerewegoagain Mon 24-Jun-19 11:06:55

Yes im also waiting for September so i don't miss out on my end of (financial) year bonus blush

Came off my pill last week to give my body time to get back into rhythm. All I've had so far is loads of spots 🙄

Is this your first or second?

noodlesoup99 Mon 24-Jun-19 13:00:41

Hi ladies!
This is my first time posting here, but I've been reading the board for ages.
I'd love to jump on this thread and have some virtual friends to chat with during this time.

I'm almost 31 and will be TTC number 1!
Have NEVER tried to get pregnant before and have always been very militant with contraception...on the pill from age 16-27 and then got a copper coil almost 4 years ago, and (apart from the first 6 months) it's been a dream for me.
I have a 28 day cycle and ovulate on day 16/17.
(I bought some OPK's from the internet a couple of months ago to see if I could pin point it, and the past few months have been getting positive tests on day 16. Hurray!)
I've started taking folic acid, I eat well and I'm a regular in the gym, although I do like a few glasses of wine so could do with losing 5lbs blush

Currently waiting on DP's divorce to be finalised (that's ANOTHER STORY hmm ) but it should be all done and dusted by late August.
For obvious reasons we have held off trying until the divorce comes through, but now the end is in sight, I have my appointment booked for my coil removed on 16th July.
DP has children from his first marriage and I'm already stressing about conceiving and us not being able to have our own...

I work out that I will be due to ovulate about 3 days after the coil comes out, so technically I could conceive in July, although we have a wedding at the back end, so I'm not putting too much pressure on myself to be having loads of sex as soon as it's out.

Wow - I've really gone on, sorry! grin
Anyway - August's cycle is when we're planning on properly trying, and the wait is KILLING me!
It's all I can think about and everyone I know is announcing pregnancy's. EEK!
Can't wait for it to be our turn.

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 13:54:04

Thanks for your replies ! Lovely to have some people to chat to and hide my madness from DH lol! Although he does now know more about my cycles than he needed to !

Andherewegoagain - good point on the end of year bonus. I don't think that employers are allowed to withold a bonus because of pregnancy or mat leave, you're still entitled to pay rises / bonus as you would expect. It's nice to have someone else starting in September :-). It will be our first. I'm still on my mini pill, not sure when to stop it really but it shouldn't inhibit ovulation really so thinking should be fine.

Noodlesoup- eeep August will be here before you know it! And having your Coil removed is a massive step. Hope you get your BFP soon!

I've been cycle tracking since Jan ans my cycles have been quite short 24-27 days. I'm excited and anxious about starting ! Feel like September is forever away!! AF will be due about 9th September .... not that I've planned it or put it in my diary lol!

noodlesoup99 Mon 24-Jun-19 14:19:29

@MrsMeow2019 I'm 100% with you on trying to hide the madness! I swear they'd have us sectioned if they could hear some of the thoughts we have about it all.
What app do you use to track? I've used Clue for about 4 years and always found it to be ok.
I've read on here about people using other ones which all seem very good, but I suppose I don't want to go too mad or change anything whilst we're only into the beginning of trying.
We'll be on holiday when I'm due to ovulate in August, so I'm really hoping I'll just be totally chilled out and relaxed...yeah right! haha

AndddddHerewegoagain Mon 24-Jun-19 14:25:11

No they can't withold bonuses or pay rises but the bonus isn't written into any contracts or performance related ive just been given it each year i work for them and it seems silly to miss out for the sake of 2 months!

This will be our second.

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 14:28:10

@noodlesoup99 I use Clue as well, find it quite good, it's simple without too many added extras that you don't need. I have no plans to do temping but might give OPKs a go in September, pointless atm while on the pill but seem a good idea otherwise.

@AndddddHerewegoagain definitely a good plan. I've worked out all our finances depending on when /if we get a BFP and slightly wish I was a bloke so didn't have these worries lol. Wish I had a job with 12 months full pay ! My sick pay is better than maternity pay sad

noodlesoup99 Mon 24-Jun-19 14:37:02

When did you start your folic acid?
@AndddddHerewegoagain have you started taking it too?
I've been taking it for about 2 months now and I know this probably sounds daft but, I feel really nice taking it thinking that it will be doing me good for when we conceive.

And in terms of weight loss in preparation too - I've been trying to make a conscious effort to not snack and see if I can get a few lbs off in the next month!
Have you both been trying to eat better? Less boozing?

AndddddHerewegoagain Mon 24-Jun-19 14:49:17

I don't drink much anyway as i have low alcohol tolerance and a high maintenance toddler grin

I eat pretty healthily as we take it in turns to make lunch in the work kitchen . Vegetable omelette today. Also can't eat gluten and hate how sweet all gluten free stuff is.

Just realised what a boring person I am 😂

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 17:50:44

@noodlesoup99 I started folic acid a month ago but missed the last week as have been away on honeymoon - drinking to much wine and eating too much ! I've started a vitamin D supplement as well, it helps make me feel like I'm working towards TTc lol!

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 17:52:49

@AndddddHerewegoagain you sound so healthy! How do you manage to keep routine with the lunches? I always do ours and it's a rush in the morning usually sandwich and a bag of crisps . I need to start a healthier approach to life !

Are you ladies getting the DHs on vitamins as well? I've bought some for mine but am sure he'll forget to take them.

My madness extends to a box of pregnancy tests and OPKs all ready and waiting under the bed lol

How old is your little one @AndddddHerewegoagain ?

AndddddHerewegoagain Mon 24-Jun-19 19:18:00

I cook at work each day. We're very lucky to have this option- we take it turns to cook and my bosses rule is we have to make enough for him 😂

Ive been taking supplements for about a month now. Resisted buying any tests yet!

My son is 2 x

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 19:40:04

@AndddddHerewegoagain that does sound good :-).

Aww 2 is a lovely age and a good gap between the DCs.

My 2 SILs recently had babies and it's really made my broodiness worse ! So cute!!! How will we all get through the next 2 months, it seems so close yet so far !

Jellybott Mon 24-Jun-19 19:47:46

I know how you feel! I stopped taking the pill about 6 weeks ago after taking it since I was 18 (I'll be 31 next month), as we want to start trying for our first in October. The wait is killing me!

I'm a little paranoid that things will take a while to go back to normal after taking the pill for so long, so I'm using the Natural Cycles app to track my cycle. According to that I'm ovulating, but the OPK's i've used this month have all been negative hmm So fingers crossed everything is okay.

On another note, anyone else worried about how they'll explain not drinking at Christmas if it happens around then?!

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 20:06:09

@Jellybott welcome ! Am so glad to see there are a few of us! We can share the madness of waiting !

Tracking is interesting isn't it, I always thought I was 28 days on the dot until tracking told me otherwise lol.

I wouldn't worry abojt the OPKs, I think it's very easy to miss the LH surge and get a positive result. Also sometimes if your on a combined pill it can take a month or so to ovulate again.

Drinking! I'm worried about this too! If we got a BFP the first cycle I'd have to explain my non drinking on my birthday confused. Do you anyone you can include on the news early who could help drink your drinks ? I'm sort of thinking I could get DH to make me gin-less G&T blush

noodlesoup99 Mon 24-Jun-19 20:19:27

@AndddddHerewegoagain if you conceive before Christmas that would give you a lovely gap between the two of them, and good for you with the not much boozing.. it's my only downfall. I'm vegan, so I'm super healthy food wise, but I deffo have a little tummy from too much wine and cider!!

@MrsMeow2019 Where did you go on your honeymoon? And congrats on the wedding too, when did you get married?

My divorce (from my ex, obviously) came through at the back end of last year, and I'm the happiest I've ever been with DP. It just feels so right after being with someone who was so clearly wrong for me, for sooo many years.
We're planning on marrying before Christmas too! So it's looking to be a busy 6 months.

And Welcome to @Jellybott ; I love that we're all trawling the conception boards before we've even started trying smile bloody lunatics!

What do you all do for work girls?

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 20:40:44

@noodlesoup99 Thank you, we went to Italy which was so nice and super hot! Sad to be back to work today - I work in healthcare, you?

Congratulations on the wedding and your new DP, sounds like you've been through a tough time and made it out the other side! What are your wedding plans? Will you schedule in your hen do before vino if off limits ?

Hehe I've been trawling the boards for 6 months, sometimes have to ban myself from them for a while but a lot of threads on mumsnet are quite funny to read.

Jellybott Mon 24-Jun-19 21:07:52

The gin-less G&T is a good shout!

I work for a local authority. There's a promotion coming up on my team soon, so not great timing, but I feel like if I keep finding reasons to put off TTC (weddings, holidays...) it'll never happen!

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 21:19:24

@JellyBott Good luck with the promotion! I know what you mean that's what I struggle a bit with, we are waiting to buy a house for a few reasons and I worry we should wait until we've bought and are in but then at my age every month counts and there will always be a reason not to won't there

AndddddHerewegoagain Mon 24-Jun-19 21:32:01

Im a house manager (hence the kitchen at work) i oversee everything in the house from other staff to making sure all bills are paid, cars are taxed and insured etc. Its a busy day!

CouscousEvaporator Mon 24-Jun-19 21:37:07

Hi everyone
Can I join? This is my first post as well and I am also feeling very impatient with waiting.
I had my copper coil out in February(!) due to heavy periods (I was on the coil for 11 years) and since then it’s like a switch has flicked and I don’t know why we are waiting anymore. It seems like aaaages ago it was out!
We were going to try in September but now I’m bridesmaid at a wedding the month I’d be due if we were lucky enough to conceive first go... always a reason to put back. So now it’s october instead!
@Jellybott I’m similar to you in that I’m also waiting a promotion, it seems sensible to wait but I have the fear that it’s not going to happen easily for us so I want to get going with ttc.

@MrsMeow2019 I work in healthcare too - not too worried about hiding the drinking yet, but I am worried about work. Due to the substances I work with I will have to tell them as soon as I get a positive test and I feel a bit weird about that as it will probably before I tell my family. :/

@noodlesoup99 it’s lovely you’ve found your lobster, have fun with the wedding planning, sounds like a busy rest of the year for you!!

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 21:48:47

@AndddddHerewegoagain Your job sounds fun! I am now imaging some kind of Downton Abbey situation ! I love organising and planning, I'm guessing we all do on TTC boards months before we're all planning to start !

@couscousEvaporator Welcome! O no, I feel your pain with the wedding this! If I wasn't being an MOH we would be trying in August! Telling your employer before your family does seem like it will be strange for you, but better to be safe isn't it smile. Luckily I'm not exposed to any chemicals just various unwell people so would need to be wearing but think I could cover it up for a few months at least.

Have any of you thought about having early / private scans ? I'd be keen to get a 7-8 week scan as 12 seems so far if we know from week 4! But then also think it's probs a waste of money as it wouldn't change anything and baby would look little more than a blob :/

MrsMeow2019 Mon 24-Jun-19 21:51:32

*imagining not imaging
*weary not *wearing

teach me to type too quickly!

noodlesoup99 Mon 24-Jun-19 21:56:30

I was imagining a Downton style house too! Amazing!
I'm a teacher, so I could definitely get away with keeping any pregnancy news to myself for a couple of months. Although I know I'll be absolutely busting at the seems to shout it from the rooftops.
I don't know about you all, but I just think it's a very surreal feeling to know that I'm going to be actively trying to have a baby, when I've spent my entire adult life trying to prevent it.
I'm totally wishing the weeks away!

noodlesoup99 Mon 24-Jun-19 21:58:23

Oh and no solid wedding plans as such.. just definitely before Christmas smile
I'm hoping I have our bump with us when we say "I do"

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