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Frustrated!

(6 Posts)
StarryEyed88 Fri 31-May-19 14:21:06

I’m so annoyed with DH today. We are TTC our 1st and basically I’m tracking dates, ovulation etc and he knows roughly my cycle but we don’t say “let’s do it right now because I’m ovulating” to try not to make it a completely mechanical process. Anyway, I ovulate today/tomorrow and he has been out drinking Wednesday and Thursday nights on pre-planned nights out. Today he is hungover at work and I won’t get a chance to see him later before a pre-planned family event.

He made a comment earlier about his parents wanting grandkids and I replied sarcastically “well maybe if someone wasn’t drunk or hungover they’d have more chance”. I know that was maybe harsh but if anything it’s him that wants the baby even more than me and he just isn’t taking it seriously.

To make matters worse, I had a mc at the end of last year and the baby would have been due next month, so I feel a bit upset about that and assumed we would be pg again by now.

I know I need to relax and the pressure isn’t helping etc but I’m just disappointed, and annoyed with him.

Skyla01 Fri 31-May-19 14:54:24

I'm sorry for your loss. This must be a hard time for you. Plus ttc is not an easy process at the best of times. If you only have a 20% chance (or whatever it is) each month you really want to make the most of each opportunity. I can understand not wanting to put the pressure on OH too much, but maybe you need to communicate a bit more about fertile days to avoid situations like you have now? It's hard to know how much to sacrifice when ttc, it takes over your life otherwise.

StarryEyed88 Fri 31-May-19 15:11:56

Thanks for your reply 😊you’re right, I just need to talk to him, I knew the sarcastic comment wasn’t going to help haha. It’s difficult isn’t it to find that balance between TTC and letting it take over your life. I’ve been pretty chilled so far, I think it’s just the timing this month.

Dweebette Sat 01-Jun-19 01:11:01

I feel your pain. I have irregular cycles and we're on cycle 6 of TTC #1 and it's really getting me down. Had a chat with DH at the start of this cycle and agreed we'd try and DTD every other day this cycle to give it our best shot. Tonight I went up to bed early and basically waited, it's now 1am and he still hasn't come to bed. I know missing one night probably won't make a difference but I just feel so alone and pissed off that I'm the one making all the sacrifices (I've given up caffeine and alcohol) while he just does his own thing. Doesn't help that a girl in work announced she's pregnant today and said "it's great because we weren't even trying so didn't have the disappointment every month". So yeah, I'm overly sensitive, I feel your pain.

StarryEyed88 Sat 01-Jun-19 09:18:00

@dweebette I’m sorry! It’s frustrating isn’t it! I hope he turned up eventually! Although I guess by the time he did you were pissed off and don’t want that memory of getting pg. It’s a lot to give up and put ourselves through, even before the (hopefully) 9 months, let’s hope it’s worth it x

Dweebette Sat 01-Jun-19 09:28:27

@StarryEyed88 he eventually did and did try it on but I was pissed off so that was that. I imagine when we get our BFPs we'll believe all the stress was worth it! Good luck!

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