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Am I strange for still wanting to hold my belly after MC?

(27 Posts)
Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 17:24:38

I'm sure I can't be the only one, I always have the urge to cradle my stomach like i'm still pregnant! I have to catch myself sometimes. I think I'm going mad!

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 17:25:15

I must add, I only recently MC'd so hopefully this will go away soon!

Chanel05 Sat 25-May-19 17:30:37

@Islandermum so sorry to hear of your mc. I could hardly bare to look at mine after my mmc. Are you ttc now or having a break from it?

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 17:32:18

@Chanel05 TTC now hopefully. Not sure about what my cycle is doing yet as at not arrived! Can't help but feel like something is missing from my belly now!
Are you TTC now?

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 17:32:45

Af* not arrived I mean!

Chanel05 Sat 25-May-19 17:38:17

@Islandermum totally understand what you mean - that awful feeling of emptiness. Are you waiting for your first af?

I had surgical management on 2nd May and only got a negative hpt on Wednesday so I'm tracking ovulation now but not holding out much hope that I'm going to this cycle ☹️.

Treaclepie19 Sat 25-May-19 17:43:12

I'm the same. It's that empty feeling.
I had a miscarriage in 2014 and in December 2018 a TFMR.
I still sleep with my pregnancy pillow or I feel empty.

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 17:51:11

Yeah @Chanel05. Waiting on first Af! I'm exactly the same, only got negative HPT on Wednesday too! I'm still testing this month, keeping a sliver of hope it might still happen. Fingers crossed for us!

Sorry to hear about your losses Treaclepie, are you currently TTC? I hope it gets easier for you!

Treaclepie19 Sat 25-May-19 17:59:27

@Islandermum thanks smile
Not yet... we were so torn apart losing our little boy in December that we just couldn't even consider it.
I'm starting to feel ready now though. Its just scary because on top of everything else we now have more tests and scans to go through if I did have another pregnancy.

Still, I don't feel we're done.

Treaclepie19 Sat 25-May-19 18:00:26

I should say we do have a 3yo so I think he's influencing things too, in that we're scared to throw his life into chaos again.

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 18:15:35

Yeah that's completely understandable Treaclepie. I hope for you that whenever you are blessed with another pregnancy that it is healthy and you get a little one from it x

Chanel05 Sat 25-May-19 18:20:36

@Treaclepie19 I'm sorry to hear about your tfmr and can completely understand feeling too nervous to try again .

@Islandermum it's so frustrating having been totally in tune with my body and then it's thrown into chaos by the mmc. It's like the mental pain drags on and on and on. I'm using opks too. Have you had any signs so far or are they faint at the minute?

MrsH497 Sat 25-May-19 18:42:29

I still find I rest my hand there. I only miscarried just over a week ago. Desperate to have our rainbow baby now

pinkoi Sat 25-May-19 20:49:41

I caught myself doing this today - miscarried 2 weeks ago at 6w 😢

Glad I'm not the only one xxx

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 23:51:50

That's reasuring. Hopefully we will all be able to move on soon xx

Islandermum Sat 25-May-19 23:53:59

@Chanel05 just faint OPKs at the moment. We will get back in the loop with our bodies soon enough! 😅

Treaclepie19 Sun 26-May-19 07:19:52

Thank you @Chanel05

Sorry to hear of your losses ❤
Take care of yourselves x

Chanel05 Sun 26-May-19 08:52:44

@Islandermum I got a flashing smiley this morning 🤞

NottonightJosepheen Sun 26-May-19 09:09:31

It makes absolute sense.

It's making me quite emotional, reading these posts.

Cradling your belly after a MC, or placing a protective hand there is such a gentle and nurturing thing to do, both as self-care for yourself and your recent pregnancy.

Women are amazing.

Avocuddles Sun 26-May-19 10:00:10

@Islandermum how long did it take for you to get your negative? I miscarried on Thursday and the hospital told me to wait three weeks to test for them which feels like such a long time!!!!! The physical symptoms haven't finished yet but are definitely subsiding.

Islandermum Sun 26-May-19 12:04:50

@Chanel05 amazing!!! Fingers crossed.

@nottonightjosepheen thank you. It just feels right ☺️

@avocuddles I tested as I was having really bad pains so I wanted to rule out an ectopic to be honest and it basically just came back as completely negative. I wanted to start tracking ASAP. I think they just don't want you to get a positive and get your hopes up I suppose. So sorry to hear about your MC. Fortunately, my physical symptoms only lasted 3 days as I was very early on x

Chanel05 Sun 26-May-19 14:06:10

@Avocuddles it took me 3 weeks exactly to get a negative hpt.

MrsH497 Sun 26-May-19 15:11:09

I miscarried we think last Friday (that's when I ended up in hospital) I got my negative HPT this morning.

Chanel05 Sun 26-May-19 16:35:36

Waiting for a negative hpt is so emotionally painful. I had no knowledge of mc until it happened to me. It's hard to process that it can be dragged out for weeks and even months.

I think I got some ewcm this afternoon 🤔. I checked this morning and had creamy cm then this afternoon I checked once more and thought I had a little bit. It stretched the 2 inch rule. Wasn't sure if it was leftover sperm though as we dtd yesterday afternoon.

Avocuddles Sun 26-May-19 16:47:45

@Chanel05 I know exactly what you mean. I knew friends who had been through MC, but had no understanding of what to expect in terms of the actual physical experience to which made it a lot more frightening than it perhaps needed to be. For this reason I'm being fairly open with friends and colleagues about what has happened to me, as I wouldn't want others to have to suffer in silence if they ever have the misfortune to go through the same.
I'm onto day 4 now and it's still going strong. Hoping it subsides soon so I can go to the toilet without having that constant reminder!

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