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how do i convince dh to have another baby?

(12 Posts)
SanetJvv Sun 01-Jul-07 18:35:53

after dd2(14 months old) we decided our family is complete. I cant help longing to try again for a boy (wont mind if a girl) My dh wont even consider having another baby. We are still young, I will be 29 in October and dh is 30 but if I want a baby I dont want to wait because I want them to grow up together. He is saying we just cant afford it and everyting in life is designed aroud 4 member families.

Bibis Sun 01-Jul-07 18:39:01

with hold sex (or should that be [wank])

Alternatively baffle him with all the reasons why 3 are better than 2, more chance some siblings will get on, might have a boy, still fit in family car, will stop you going on at him for a while, can still have a life afterwards, can use hand me downs etc etc etc.

Good Luck, we have 4 and it's great

SanetJvv Sun 01-Jul-07 18:42:52

LOL!!!
I think it would be harder on me to with hold sex...
I will start nagging him.

honeyapple Sun 01-Jul-07 18:58:35

Hiya- just like to say that it took me a couple of years to get DP to agree to having a third child. He would use the reasons that your DH is giving! ANyway, my point is, that you are both young and would it actually matter what the age gap ended up being? My DC are 8 and 4, and are really excited about having a little brother (I am 23wks PG).

Oh and don't nag too much! It's much nicer if your DH decides for himself that another child would be fab, rather than you having nagged him into submission!

A good tip would be to meet up with friends with small babies/children and cuddle them a lot in his presence...

Bibis Sun 01-Jul-07 18:59:10

ps I was 32 when i had number 1 and 38 when I had number 4 so you have loads of time yet

honeyapple Sun 01-Jul-07 19:02:58

Cor Bibis! 4 kids in 6 yrs! I'm impressed and feeling knackered just thinking about it! (slight kijack- BTW did you always think you would have 4? Have you finished?)

lisad123 Sun 01-Jul-07 19:04:22

I was the other way round Dh wanted another and I didnt. It took 4 years for me to say yes. You cant conviece him im afraid, it needs to be something you both agree on. I would explain to him how much you want this and maybe ask him to think seriously about it. Other than that wait.

lisa

Hayls Sun 01-Jul-07 19:15:08

IME you can't. Think you have to wait until you both feel it is the right time- I was ready ages ago (dd is 3.5) but dh is only just coming round to the idea and I'm 6w pg. (did have 2 mcs since dd though- 1st was unplanned but much wanted by both) Give it some time, I made dh really listen to me and gave all my reasons and he eventually realised how strongly I felt about it and agreed but if he needed anything more than a gentle prod that wouldn't have worked.

SanetJvv Sun 01-Jul-07 19:21:14

thank you all, you are right, hopefully with time he will feel the same, and maybe it would be better to have the last one with a bigger age gap... would probably be easier and my 2 dds will enjoy it more, like your children Honeyapple. He is such a wonderfull husband and father and he loved having a baby in the house. Nobody could prepare us on how hard (and wonderfull) it is to have children, maybe he is still in shock (the age gap between our dds are 14 months...)

SanetJvv Sun 01-Jul-07 19:21:14

thank you all, you are right, hopefully with time he will feel the same, and maybe it would be better to have the last one with a bigger age gap... would probably be easier and my 2 dds will enjoy it more, like your children Honeyapple. He is such a wonderfull husband and father and he loved having a baby in the house. Nobody could prepare us on how hard (and wonderfull) it is to have children, maybe he is still in shock (the age gap between our dds are 14 months...)

Bibis Sun 01-Jul-07 21:23:08

Honeyapple

I gather I told other people I wanted 4 (can't remember it myself).

Just worked it out and realised that I was still 37 when I had number 4, there are just under 5 years between oldest and youngest, and yes I am completely knackered, it is great though and to see them interacting is incredible.

Incidentally it took me 5 years to conceive number 1 which happened the month after ivf failed .

Yes we have definitely finished, we are still changing nappies 6 years later...............[tired emoticon]

3catstoo Tue 03-Jul-07 13:56:53

It was the other way around for us. DH wanted a third, I didnt. It took him 2 yrs to convince me.

Now I want number 4. He doesn't.

I have nagged constantly and he has given in to unrotected sex but I have to not tell him when I'm Oving.

Unfortunately we've been (kindof) ttc for 11 months now, so DH is not the only obstacle.

He still wavers and decides he's going to abstain unless I let him use a condom. I just say fine, you abstain, and then try to charm the socks off him until he can't help himself.
It's worked for 4 days in a row this cycle so I'm crossing fingers that we've done it.

Good luck and keep us posted.

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