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Got very upset!

46 replies

Soph73 · 19/06/2007 12:31

Don´t quite know where to post this but need a bit of a rant. DH and I have a friend whose baby is due in 9 weeks and we saw her at the weekend. She knows that she is expecting a girl and I just casually asked whether she had a name for her yet. She said yes and she´s going to call her Emily. I nearly passed out because that´s exactly what I wanted to call a little girl if and when we have one (it was my grandmother's name). I had to put a brave face on because no-one knows we're ttc (apart from the lovely ladies on MN ) That evening, had a few too many and completely broke down in front of DH. Am I being incredibly stupid or has anyone else been through this?

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NoodleStroodle · 19/06/2007 12:32

It is horrible when someone steals your name.

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 12:34

The thing is I was sort of wavering against the name until she said that's what she´s going to call her baby - how selfish is that? Now I can´t think of a single name apart from that one that I´d like to call a little girl!!

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 12:36

And I´m not even pregnant yet DH thinks I´m barmy.

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BrothelSprouts · 19/06/2007 12:37

You can still use the name.

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MerryMarigold · 19/06/2007 12:45

We really wanted Madeleine, but had a boy (couldn't think of boys names we liked!!). Then a close friend had a girl and called her Madeleine (she didn't know we were thinking of it, she was wavering with Isobel but went for Maddie) and now if we ever have a girl we can't call her Maddie. Sob!

But the good news is: I now have another girl's name and it is so much cooler and too unusual for anyone to steal. Not even ttc yet! But I am SO desperate for a girl, I will be devastated if it's a boy (once again, no boys names sorted).

I think it's natural how your feeling, but perhaps is more about the fact you are ttc and she is having a baby (girl) and all the emotions involved with that. You're not mad at all! I'm sure when you have your baby it will either be a boy or you will have thought of a name you LOVE 100%.

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TaylorsMummy · 19/06/2007 12:47

i don't mean to sound heartless but it's a very common name and if your friend doesn't even know you are trying to concieve then it's not like she's stolen the name off you

you can still use it.it's not like your babies are going to be born at the same time and it's not an unusual name.

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Curmudgeonlett · 19/06/2007 12:50

people don't own names

and this sense of ownership is sorely misplaced

so what if your friend has a Madeleine, if you love the name there's nothing to stop you using it too

I know cousins with the same name, best friends with the same name

I think maybe the OP is stressed with the hole TTC issue .. but honestly and truly you have to get this into perspective .. you are upset because a friend has decided on a name that you also like for a baby you haven't even conceived yet? .. sounds barking, no?

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 12:50

Thanks Merry - I think you´re probably right about the fact that she´s having a baby and I´m trying to have a baby. I´m very of her anyway because she´s already got 2 grown up children by her first husband and this is the 2nd one by her second husband and she seems to fall pg at the drop of a hat It´s a shame she´s so lovely so I can´t even ignore her

I suppose you´re right brothelsprouts I could still use the name but think I´ll try and find another. Knowing me when I do fall pg with another it´ll be a boy and I don´t have any names at all for boys (typical!)

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Curmudgeonlett · 19/06/2007 12:50

My neice is called Emily .. she's 19 and diving in some exotic place

should nobody else ever be called Emily again then?

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Curmudgeonlett · 19/06/2007 12:51

Emily has been in the top 10 favourite girls names for many many years .. there's millions of them

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Curmudgeonlett · 19/06/2007 12:52

top 100 girls names for last 5 years

Emily is 2nd favourite twice, and first twice

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DeJager · 19/06/2007 12:53

Aw, I know how you feel...but honest, it's only a name, and your little girl is going to be different in every other way.
Don't worry about it...

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DeJager · 19/06/2007 12:55

Aw, I know how you feel...but honest, it's only a name, and your little girl is going to be different in every other way.
Don't worry about it...

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Curmudgeonlett · 19/06/2007 12:57

We gave our daughter a name that an ex-colleague who I had seen twice a year for about 2 years, who had moved 2 hours away from my house, had called her daughter who was 4 years older than mine

she got the hump

we laughed

how ridiculous

we're down to sending christmas cards now and actually didn't bother last year

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 12:57

taylorsmummy - don´t get me wrong I don´t think she´s stolen the name off of me and I know there are loads of Emily´s on this earth and it´s not solely exclusive to me (even I´m not that silly )

curmudgeonlett - completely barking, I know I just needed a bit of a moan. Yes, I am a bit stressed about the whole ttc thing that´s why it´s nice to be here to have you ladies giving me a virtual slap every now and again

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 13:01

curmudgeonlet - thanks for that list and it made me smile about you and your ex-colleauge.

Thanks dejager.

See, that´s what I needed a bit of level-headedness. Am feeling a lot happier now

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scorpio1 · 19/06/2007 13:03

Soph-its ok i never ever want anyone i know to call their child my ds1 name. You could still call your baby Emily; but you may have a boy! Or what about something like Emily-Emmie, Amelia, Amelie?

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Curmudgeonlett · 19/06/2007 13:06

you have to save major irrationalities until you're pregnant and post-partum

cos then nobody can have a go at you for them .. they all have to tiptoe round you saying 'yes dear' .. its the law

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 13:10

Do you know scorpio I have a friend whose daughter is called Amelie (she´s 18 or 19 now)

curmudgeonlett - yes, must remember that

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scorpio1 · 19/06/2007 13:11

we like that for a girl

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goingfor3 · 19/06/2007 13:15

I realise it is unsetting but Emily is a popular name and nobody is going to think twice about you using the name too. If it was an obscure name then other people probably would be a little odd but it's no ones bussiness but your own.

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Soph73 · 19/06/2007 13:19

I know goingfor3 I´m just being silly and feel now. Am off to give myself a good talking too LOL!

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Aloha · 19/06/2007 13:27

Well, it is a bit daft tbh. Call your baby Emily. There are millions of Emilys. psst...we have an Emily and you are welcome to use it, I won't be upset

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scorpio1 · 19/06/2007 13:33

(aloha-thread for you in other subjects btw)

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Hayls · 19/06/2007 13:43

I also have an Emily and think it's a fab name that should be shared by people who deserve it (i.e sweet, beautiful, kind and generous... just like my 3 yo )so you should definitely use it

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