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Am I being irrational?

(10 Posts)
JayneLut Sun 17-Dec-17 14:44:41

TTC #1 cycle 2. I'm 33 Hubbie is 34 married July this year.

Just found out my SMIL (wife number 3 of FIL) is pregnant with twins (first children) at 50. FIL is 63. Hubbie is oldest of 7 siblings.

I'm really emotional and conflicted about this. Normal?

DailyMaileatmyshit Sun 17-Dec-17 18:32:26

I'm not sure why you'd be conflicted to be honest.can they afford it?

It'll be nice for you to have similar age kids.

Bubblegum89 Sun 17-Dec-17 18:47:36

You are only on cycle two of ttc so it’s extremely early days for you yet. It is hard to hear about pregnancy announcements but for all you know, it could be you next month. I have feelings like this but I’ve been ttc for 13 months but I try to remember that it’s not other people’s fault that I can’t get pregnant. Good luck

TryOurMustard Sun 17-Dec-17 18:51:04

Need more info. What's the problem?

JayneLut Sun 17-Dec-17 19:08:39

SMIL is not an amazingly nice person. She's jealous and controlling. She refused to come to our wedding because SIL2(19) was coming and she doesn't like her. They've also not got a good track record of being emotionally available for the kids. I can just envisage a lot of drama along the line with this. It means any kids we have are likely to not have a granddad now. Kinda sucks.

hollowtree Sun 17-Dec-17 19:11:32

My SMIL is my mate from school so exactly the same age... married my DH's dad who is 64 and they've got 3 DC, youngest is same age as our DD! A bit crazy but makes family gatherings great as we all talk about and focus on the babies and kids! It's nice

JayneLut Sun 17-Dec-17 19:19:38

I don't think this is going to be a nice situation based on past experience with this lady. I don't really want to share happy mummy stuff with her. She's been pretty horrible to my husband and I. She's also been pretty bad to my youngest BILs and SIL. This feels more like a great big wedge to drive the family even further apart. She's jealous and controlling and masaively secretive. We've tried reaching out to her quite a few times. We get on with my FIL. But I think this is the begining of the end sad

PS. We live on different continents, which makes it pretty difficult anyway.

JayneLut Mon 18-Dec-17 09:25:04

I'm also struggling to see how FIL will be able to be a granddad with toddlers of his own sad

FutureFairyCrayon Mon 18-Dec-17 20:18:59

Oh well, look on the bright side hmm twin pregnancies are often fraught with complications and she’s pretty old, so maybe you’re worrying about your fil’s ability to juggle parenthood with grandparenthood prematurely.

Seriously though, have a word with yourself. You sound very jealous.

namechangedcantthinkofnewone Mon 18-Dec-17 20:28:43

Yes, what FutureFairyCrayon said.

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