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How soon would you TTC again after a miscarriage?

(27 Posts)
TwoDrifters Mon 20-Nov-17 11:28:20

I literally just had a miscarriage that finished over the weekend. I was 5 weeks pregnant.

My question is, would you wait for your next period to come naturally, and then start TTC again? Or would you start straight away, i.e. now?

I am 39 and feel time really isn’t on my side (we had been trying for 10 months before we even conceived this time and I’m worried it could be at least another 10 months again). I really just want to get on with trying again.

But I’ve read so much conflicting advice online about waiting for at least one cycle to ensure your body is “fully cleared out” and back to functioning normally.

WWYD? Any and all advice welcome. Thank you!

louella99 Mon 20-Nov-17 11:43:17

So sorry about your miscarriage. I may be wrong but my understanding is one of the main reasons they like you to wait is for better dating of the next pregnancy?

I think you can only do what's right for you. If you want to get on with it, I'd get on with it! Either way good luck for the future

rupertpenryswife Mon 20-Nov-17 11:44:10

Sorry to hear about your miscarriage, I have been in your position, some advise to wait for a month to enable dating of the pregnancy not to 'clear out' it's really up to you, for me we started straight away and I got pregnant on my second cycle.

Good luck miscarriage is awful.

Fia256 Mon 20-Nov-17 12:49:30

I’m sorry for your loss flowers

Just try when you feel ready is probably the best advice. They only really say to wait for your first period because of dating purposes.

Everyone’s body’s are different after miscarriage though. I had a late loss in June, started trying again straight away. I track everything and have noticed my body is taking a while to recover properly (temps all over the place and luteal phase shorter than normal) so while we are ttc straight after, my body doesn’t seem to have been ready properly.

But then my friend fell pregnant the month after her miscarriage and everything looks fine so far!

Wish you the best of luck ttc again and with any future pregnancy

GinnyBaker Mon 20-Nov-17 12:56:28

Having a period inbetween does help for dating purposes. This can be more important in a pregnancy following a miscarriage if you are having an early reassurance scan.

However, like you I felt time was against us and didn't wait, I decided it was more important to try again than to have clear dates.

The only thing that is absolutely vital is that you get a negative home pregnancy test before ttc so that you can be sure a positive pregnancy test means a new pregnancy.

Zoo33 Mon 20-Nov-17 13:00:40

Hi @TwoDrifters. So sorry for your loss. I’m still in the process of miscarrying (medical management 3 weeks ago wasn’t completely successful so having surgical later this week). I was recommended to wait a cycle, but I’m not planning on waiting. As @Fia256 says though, I have no idea what my body will do... I wish you the best of luck whatever you decide. X

TwoDrifters Mon 20-Nov-17 16:44:20

Thank you so much everyone for your replies and sympathy. And hugs to all those who have also been through this misery.

I am quite a control freak so accurate dating of any future pregnancy does appeal to me. But I also want to maximise all possibilities of conceiving again so don’t want to wait and miss a chance.

It’s such a head fry.

I think I’ll try to get a GP appointment tomorrow and see if they can measure my hCG level and go from there.

Thanks again all! x

Darkstar4855 Mon 20-Nov-17 17:07:04

I work in a medical field (not giving details so as not to out myself).

We used to advise people to wait six months before trying again but then research showed that it didn’t make any difference to the chances of success whether couples waited or tried again straight away.

The advice we give now is to try again whenever you feel emotionally ready but to wait for either a normal period OR a negative urine pregnancy test first (no need for a blood test).

This is not for dating reasons (dating can be done by ultrasound) but to ensure everything has completely resolved following the miscarriage and there is no risk of problems from any pregnancy tissue left behind.

Hope that helps, sorry for your loss and good luck TTC.

TwoDrifters Mon 20-Nov-17 17:15:50

Thank you Darkstar that’s really helpful x

Mandala23 Mon 20-Nov-17 17:34:17

Sorry for your loss. My view is slightly different due to the fact when I MC my doctor told me if I wasn’t trying to be careful because you can be more fertile the month after it has happened due to hormone levels. So I would say if you feel ready, go for it.

TwoDrifters Mon 20-Nov-17 18:02:12

Thanks Mandala I’ve read that too and am trying to not get my hopes up too much!

Heartofglass12345 Mon 20-Nov-17 18:45:29

Sorry for your loss flowers i had a miscarriage in feb 2015, i was due 27th september. I had a period then got pregnant again and had a due date of 1st jan. I was surprised how quickly it happened the 2nd time, and my little boy has just turned 2 because he couldnt wait until january lol.
If you feel ready, go for it smile

WhyTheHeckMe Mon 20-Nov-17 21:21:15

Hi OP. I miscarried in July at 6 weeks, really sorry to hear you've also been through it.
The hospital advised that providing I had a negative test there was no reason to not try again immediately.
I miscarried on the Friday, bled for 6 days, and then 4 days after that I got a negative test.
2 weeks later I got a positive opk so we decided to try and I got pregnant again, I'm now 18 weeks.
I'm so glad that we didn't wait but emotionally we were ready. Losing the baby was awful but I felt like getting pregnant again would help ease the pain.
Good luck OP x

TwoDrifters Mon 20-Nov-17 23:55:57

Heart and WhyTheHeck I’m sorry for your losses but thank you both so much for sharing your positive experiences x

RainbowWish Tue 21-Nov-17 00:03:26

So sorry for your loss. flowers
I miscarried nearly 3 years ago now. When I went for a scan to confirm i had lost our wee one the nurse had advise us if we were going to try again the sooner the better as the pregnancy hormones are still high in your body.
It felt too rushed for us so we waited 2 periods and fell pregnant straight away.
I hope you are bless with a rainbow baby soon. And remember to take time to grieve.
Thoughts are with you

TwoDrifters Tue 21-Nov-17 09:51:53

I’m so sorry Rainbow - thank you for taking time to comment and I’m so glad you fell pregnant again fairly quickly.

Helbelle75 Tue 21-Nov-17 10:54:39

So sorty for your loss. Make sure you take time to be kind to yourself.
I had a mmc at 10.5 aged 40. I conceived again 2 months later and dd is now 7 months old.
Do whatever feels right for you.

Presh12345 Tue 21-Nov-17 11:13:45

Hey. I had a MMC in June at 9 weeks. Devastated. I was 38 then, 39 now. Really starting to worry as it hasn't happened again since. Everyone says you will be more fertile but I wasn't.

FutureFairyCrayon Tue 21-Nov-17 11:24:47

I'm so sorry for your loss Drifters.

I conceived at 39, and had a mmc at 8 weeks. We conceived again six months later and I now have a 3yo DD.

Last year I had a chemical pregnancy in October, conceived again the following month, but had another mmc at around 9 weeks. I was shocked to conceive again six weeks later (sadly ended at 14 weeks due to Patau Syndrome). It took me four months to start ovulating again, so we've only just started ttc-ing again properly.

My only advice would be to make sure that you feel emotionally ready to go through it all again (particularly as a pp mentions, not being sure of dates when having an early reassurance scan can be a real headfuck). I've found having at least one period before starting to try again reassures me that everything is back in sync.

Best of luck, there are plenty of us ancient fortysomething mums around!

TwoDrifters Tue 21-Nov-17 23:36:33

Thank you Helbelle and Fairy. I do know logically in my head that 40 is just an arbitrary number but for some reason it seemed to matter to me to have this baby whilst I was still in my thirties. With this last pregnancy, on my due date, I would have still just been 39. Hey ho. C’est la vie and all that.

Presh I’m so so sorry. I saw a GP today who told me if I feel ready to TTC now, then to go ahead, and if nothing has happened within six months, then to go back to see him. I’m resigning myself to it being a long journey still. Hugs to you flowers

Katsanddogs Wed 22-Nov-17 00:03:05

I'm very sorry for your loss twodrifters. And to everyone else one here who has experienced a loss.
I had a mc at around 6 weeks last month. I was told that i can start ttc straight away. I haven't had AF for almost 5 years due to contraception and unexplained (uninvestigated) amenorrhea for a couple of years before going back on contraception so who knows what will happen to my cycle anyway! The most frustrating part is it's been 6 weeks and I've not had an AF yet but seemed to ovulate last week so fx.
I think you can start trying again as soon as you get a bfn (so you know your next bfp is a new pregnancy). I personally think that of your body is not ready you won't ovulate anyway.
Hope your cycle gets back to normal quickly and good luck.

SignoraStronza Wed 22-Nov-17 00:09:56

I MC at about 6.5 weeks (I tried to view it as a chem pg as sometimes had a 32 day cycle, but in reality was just getting used to/excited sbout the pg). Didn't bother waiting, just carried on dtd as usual and was pg again a month later. Was pretty stressed up until least the 20 wk scan though. Never had any issues with the previous 2 (both conceived 1st month of trying) but realised that at 35, was a little older!

TwoDrifters Wed 22-Nov-17 09:42:14

I hope all regulates for you soon Kats.

Thanks for sharing your positive experience Signora.

Sorry for both of your previous losses, though. This really is a far more commonplace event than gets talked about often, isn’t it.

CL1982 Wed 22-Nov-17 11:10:01

Hey OP - just a quickie. We have had x3 miscarriages and are now pregnancy with #4. I would go go go personally if you're ready.

TurquoiseDress Wed 22-Nov-17 12:50:06

Sorry to hear about your loss thanks

I'm 39 too and if it was me I'd just get on with TTC once you get the negative pregnancy test.

There's no hard & fast rule, just go with what feels right. As for dating the pregnancy- the dating scan at around 11-13 weeks is very accurate at predicting due date.

Before that I think they just base things on your last period- so the dating scan will often change the EDD anyway.

I had a missed miscarriage (found out at dating scan) in summer 2016 & we just cracked on once I got a negative PT.

The age thing is a factor definitely.
I don't want to sound alarming or worrying, but I was 37 at the time of the MMC and am now 39.

We've been TTC with no success for almost 16 months now and I do wonder if I'll ever get pregnant again.

Good luck with everything

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