Should I see a doctor?

[Doglikeafox]

Hi everyone,
I'm on cycle 6 TTC #1. Have been off birth control for 18 months, have a very regular cycle and very clear signs of when I'm ovulating.... yet nothing. I know the standard advice is to wait 12 months before seeing a doctor, but I'm only 19. I'm supposed to be the most fertile I will ever be right now. I've been taking folic acid every day for 8 months, my BMI is 23.5, I'm fit and healthy, I don't smoke, drink and neither does my partner with a BMI of 20. We dtd every other day in the 7 day lead up to ovulation, and then on ovulation day and the day after.
For financial reasons to do with my partners work, if I don't fall pregnant in the next couple of months then we will have to wait several years before we can try again. I feel like something is wrong, and have worried about being infertile most of my life for seemingly no reason.
Will the doctor even see me at this stage? Will they do testing?
I don't know if this is relevant, but my partner's mum suffered with infertility and tried for my DP for 12 years and tried for another 8 years after conceiving him until she got the menopause. His dads parents also struggled to conceive him.
Any advice would be so much appreciated, and please don't I'm being inconsiderate to those who have been trying for so much longer than I.

[physicskate]

Last time I went to see my GP, I'd been ttc for 11 and a half months and had just suffered my second chemical pregnancy. He was an absolute ass to me and told me that I would have to wait another 12 months for even the most basic blood tests or that I should have another miscarriage, despite my understanding that chemicals don't 'count' because they are so common. (He wasn't an ass for telling me to wait longer but for refusing to look me in the eye when discussing my early miscarriage and telling to miscarry again before he would 'care' about offering any tests.).

So no, they wouldn't be likely to offer tests at this point for you. Even though you are the most fertile you will ever be, it is incredibly common for ttc to take 6-12 months.

Hang in there. Keep doing what you're doing.

[ohherewegoagain]

I can tell you are really worried. I would probably go to a private cinic and get a fertility MOT for both you and your partner. It seems like youa re doing everything right. You could also confirm that you are actually ovulating by taking your temp each morning, I'd do this alongside using OPKs if you aren't already.

Good luck x

[Doglikeafox]

Thanks for the helpful replies. Yes it is something I'm very worried about. I'm going to do some research into fertility checks privately now, thank you so much.

[Doglikeafox]

And I'm sorry that happened physics. Not the same, but my doctor absolutely refuses to check for glandular fever for me and my partner approximately two years ago. He literally said 'well we'll know soon anyway'. Both DP and I were hospitalised for over a week with glandular fever, tonsillitis and secondary infections including quinsy. At one point, it didn't look my partner was going to make it. Although the doctor diagnosing glandular fever earlier wouldn't have helped, if he had even looked at us he would have seen the tonsillitis and therefore put us on antibiotics before things progressed.

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

that I should have another miscarriage, despite my understanding that chemicals don't 'count' because they are so common

Not to hijack the thread but - when you say chemicals, had you missed your period? Because my two losses at five weeks could be considered chemicals, but definitely 'counted' (along with my MC at 7 weeks) for recurrent miscarriage.

Doglike I'm sorry you're so worried but agree the GP is very unlikely to do anything at this point. I really sympathise - I also have a 'deadline' before it becomes very complicated workwise (mine is January - 18 months after we started trying so I never really thought it might be a problem when we started!), and I know it's awful having that extra pressure on top of already wanting it so much. When you say very clear signs of ovulation - do you mean cervical mucus? Because for some people that is misleading, so I'd try temping to double check just in case.

[physicskate]

Lisa with both I didn't make it past 4w3d. With the second, tests went negative the day after af was due. That was in march.

I was able to bypass my gp and self refer to the fertility clinic. They've not been brilliant with communication and my mental health has suffered (if you couldn't tell from my post!!).

I'm nearing ov and I just know it's not going to happen this cycle so feeling very low at the moment. I wouldn't wish this on anyone!!!

[BrutusMcDogface]

Go and see a gp if you know you have a nice, supportive one...but unfortunately I agree that nothing will be done until youve been trying for 12 months plus. It's 6 months after the age of 35, I think.

Good luck!

[Doglikeafox]

I mean my temperature, cervical mucus, position of cervix, sex drive, the way I feel. I've always been quite in tune with my body and my cycle so I'm fairly sure I am ovulating... or atleast my body thinks I am
Unfortunately my GP isn't great, and neither is the practice as a whole. I am going to look at going private. I just can't help having this huge feeling like something is wrong.
Thank you for your advice everyone.

[hellomarshmallow]

Hi OP, could equally be your DP's sperm that needs checking out. If there is an issue, it may not be with you.

[MouseLove]

Hey!! It can take healthy couples up to a year with absolutely no reason to worry or anything "wrong" so 6 months really is only a small time to be TTC. I understand your worry but if you're doing everything you should just keep at it. I don't think a doctor will want to know about any issues just yet. They will want you trying for at least a year.

I would STRONGLY recommend that you visit your nurse and get some advice about TTC, state that you've been trying for 6 months and ask if there's anything you should be taking vitamin wise - doesn't matter if you already know what you should be taking. Then in another 6 months they will have record of your intent. I'm hoping you'll be pregnant by then but if not, then you have a fall back.

If you aren't already, try tracking your temp for a few cycles and use OPK to confirm ovulation day as you may be missing it by a few days either side.

Good luck!!

Ps. Those worried about miscarriages and such, unfortunately chemical pregnancies are not classed as miscarriages in the eyes of the NHS as they are extremely common. Accounting for almost 75% of all losses and when you take that into account, it happens a lot. Chemicals happen before 5 weeks as they never develop past the fertilisation stage as the egg fails. Anything past 5 weeks is a clinical pregnancy as they're will be a sack. It doesn't make it any less upsetting. It's one of the reasons I do not early test. I had a mmc at 10 weeks in February. Xxx

[physicskate]

Hi Mouselove

I've had conflicting info from the NHS about the chemical pregnancies. They were both pretty gutting, but my GP classed them as conceiving and wouldn't do day 3 or 21 erroneously. I've been debating writing a formal complaint about how he spoke to me (have another miscarriage etc...) despite NHS not classing chemicals as miscarriage....

The whole thing was incredibly frustrating. To be told I don't matter and to wait ANOTHER year!! I was clearly quite vulnerable during the appointment (still am).

I am thinking it was very out of the ordinary for how people are treated by their GP about this and is a bit extreme - but not totally unheard of.

The fertility clinic that I visited 16 months after starting ttc, said I wasn't too early to visit them and that it was worth testing me. Haven't had any results yet (nearly 18 months in...). They did find polycystic ovaries on the ultrasound though... not sure what it means yet.

[MouseLove]

I feel for you Kate. I think it's so important that the carers around us are sensitive to these issues. Thankfully I have had nothing but wonderful and delicate care throughout my TTC journey and so I have a good mind set. It's so sad when the opposite happens and like yourself you are left mentally scared and are more susceptible to fall into depression. I really hope you can find some help, have you reached out the the miscarriage association? I think it would really help for you to speak with someone. Sending hugs. Xx

Op sorry to derail. Xxx

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

Those worried about miscarriages and such, unfortunately chemical pregnancies are not classed as miscarriages in the eyes of the NHS as they are extremely common.

Genuine question - where is this recorded as official policy? I was so concerned that mine wouldn't 'count' that I looked and looked and couldn't find anything at saying an earliest point at which they'll consider it: the NHS website just says 'A miscarriage is the loss of a pregnancy during the first 23 weeks'. I've now seen two different recurrent miscarriage clinics and no one has ever questioned me closely on the timing when I've said 'about five weeks', even though I'm surely right on the cusp?

[LisaSimpsonsbff]

And yes, sorry to derail OP.

[MouseLove]

Lisa if you miss Af and go past 5 weeks LMP it's classed as a clinical pregnancy as there will be a sac visible on an ultrasound. Anything before is chemical if you've had a positive test. The NHS usually don't document these things because technically it's all a loss. In terms of them investigating for recurrent miscarriages you usually need to have a sac for it to be seen as a viable pregnancy which is why most gps don't investigate multiple chemical pregnancies unless you've had one clinic loss or have an understanding gp. It's basically because the NHS is sooooo stretched and unfortunately chemicals are soooooo common. Most women don't even realise they have had a chemical loss as they would get their af around the same time as normal. Speaking with your gp would answer any questions on their policies (for example some gps will give clomid to people with a BMI of 35 but some want 30 and less.)