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How old is too old?

(8 Posts)
KAR79 Mon 10-Apr-17 20:14:03

Hi ladies,
Opinions gratefully received. I'm almost 40 and partner is 55 and he had vasectomy 14 years ago. We've discussed getting a reversal we would like a child together (each have 3 of our own). Have seen doctor who gives a 30%success rate for reversal working.
Are we mad to want to go ahead or are we best saving the money, shouldn't be but we can't help thinking about peoples opinions.
Thanks for reading x

Zampa Mon 10-Apr-17 20:15:57

If it's physically possible, you're not too old!

Lots of issues to consider obviously (greater risk to the baby, age you'd like to retire etc) but if you're happy with all that ...!

Oysterbabe Mon 10-Apr-17 20:25:28

It's such a personal thing and you'll know yourselves whether you feel up to it.
My personal opinion, I don't think 40 is too old but I think 55 is. Hitting 70 and having a teenager running you ragged will be hard.

physicskate Mon 10-Apr-17 20:39:08

Agreed about 55. My dad was 42 when I was born and he was always 'the old dad'. I know it's different nowadays - but I HATE it. I am in my early thirties and trying to have a kid. My dad is in his mid (going on late) 70s. That means my kids probably won't remember him well... especially as he is showing signs of dementia. It makes me absolutely gutted that my future kids (when they finally decide to come along!!!!) won't know him. He is, however, an amazing father to me and my sister.

40 is not too old imho.

KAR79 Mon 10-Apr-17 21:09:48

Thanks for the honesty. I just can't imagine never having another baby and he's the person I love more than any other. Age plays a big part in our decision and I appreciate the honesty x

user1471496670 Mon 10-Apr-17 21:36:06

Well not everyone is lucky enough to fall in love with the right person at an early age so imo if you're both physically healthy and able...then do what's right for you.
I'm very early pregnant with my first and will be 39 when this baby is born...DP will be 41. We are incredibly grateful we've been able to get the chance to do this and hopefully if all goes well will add to our family a couple of yesterday down the line. Good luck with whatever you decide x

MrsCharlieD Tue 11-Apr-17 19:44:48

35 was my cut off but that was a personal choice as I have other risk factors where pregnancy is concerned and didn't want to push my luck. Personally I think 55 would be a no for me. To be 55 and back changing nappies and doing night feeds sounds incredibly hard. My parents are that age and very fit but my mum is knackered after an afternoon babysitting my ds and has only had him once overnight, he's a poor sleeper so not the best example but she said to me she was in no hurry to do it again. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

BikeRunSki Tue 11-Apr-17 19:49:45

I know a 62 year old who became a father for the fifth time on New Year's Day. His wife is 40. His children are 22, 19, 6, 4 and 3 months. The mother of the older 2 died.

It very much works for them, and he is SAHD (retired) to the younger ones. I'd hate it!

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