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Age 44: is it time to give up?

(7 Posts)
Warpeddog Fri 10-Feb-17 23:44:48

I've just gone 44. Have been ttc for one year; had one mc and last April had to have an abortion because of awful chromosomenal problems.

Before this I had an mc at age 39,then conceived my healthy son at 40.

Until the abortion I literally fell pregnant every time we tried to conceive, but since then nothing. Am I too old? Is it time to give up? My periods are still regular (well, from every 29 days now down to every 24-26).

Feeling sad about giving up. But couldn't face another termination.

ems91 Sat 11-Feb-17 14:24:27

I think you have to do what's right for you and your family, there's no right or wrong answer I suppose. If you're completely desperate to have another child then keep trying while you still can. A colleague of mine had two or three miscarriages and had to abort at 14 weeks due to chromosomal abnormality when she was around 42-43 years old, but went on to have a gorgeous little boy who was very healthy and happy about a year and a half down the line.

It must have been awful for you to have gone through that flowers
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do x

Jenbob13 Sat 11-Feb-17 14:39:09

My lovely Dear Aunt is 46, been ttc for 10 years, had 4 rounds of IVF, has PCOS, Endometriosis and numerous miscarriages.
The moral of this story is she now has an absolute beauty of a 3 month old girl.

Im a healthcare professional and have a patient who after a similar story to yours has a 6 month old, she is 53!

My mum, had 12 miscarriages, 2 ectopics and a trophoblastic tumour in between having me and my sister over a span of 13 years.

Im a healthy 26 year old with no problems that I know of and it still took me 2 years to
fall pregnant after starting to ttc.

Im a true believer in hope and what is meant to be will be. But don't feel like its too late or your too old because from my own experience and the above mentioned you still have a few years left yet ❤️

Bloopbleep Sat 11-Feb-17 14:39:20

I know a few women who are heavily pregnant naturally at 46 but the risk of mc and chromasomal damage is greater as you get older and the number of eggs you have available doesn't make a difference to their quality. If you're happy to continue to face these potential difficulties and are still able to catch an egg then there's a chance you'll have a healthy baby. If you're in a position to try IVF then donor egg may be an option but inrealise that's not for everyone.,

Waterfeature Sat 11-Feb-17 14:57:52

I'm 44, nearly 45, had 2 MC in the last 2 years. I'm not giving up. I've got a friend who had dc at 44 and 48 (!) and another friend with dc at 44. We've all got older dc... I know the odds aren't great but I want to have one last try.

MrsDilligaf Sat 11-Feb-17 19:29:26

I'm 43 in April. I'm not done yet. My DD will be 1 later on this month and we've talked about adding to our family and discussed what that would mean for us.

This will probably be my last year of trying though so I have everything crossed that I am pregnant by Christmas!

GreedyDuck Sat 11-Feb-17 21:37:32

I'm 43 in March and not quite ready to give up. Mmc 2013, DD born 2014, mmc Christmas 2016. We have just started ttcing again.

I think 45 is my absolute cut off. It used to be 43, so when I got my BFP in November I was over the moon that I'd somehow managed to beat my 'deadline'.

I'm so sorry that you had to terminate, that's very tough. I was fortunate that both my losses were early, but I still dread it happening again and am unsure as to whether still trying is completely wise.

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