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Any larger ladies TTC?

(55 Posts)
NickMyLipple Sat 31-Dec-16 15:42:11

In a bit of a dilemma really. I'm morbidly obese and wear size 24-26 in clothes. Despite my size I do try to keep healthy - I eat much better now than I did a few years ago, and we're relatively active as a couple (Sunday walks for 8 miles, climbed mt Snowdon earlier in the year etc). I definitely have an unhealthy relationship with food and I do still eat too much crap too often, but I started slimming world a few months ago and lost 3 stone but fell off the wagon about 5 months in. I plan to start again in the new year and have planned meals for the first few weeks to get me off to a good start.

We are thinking of TTC in 2017. I have an implant at the moment which is due for removal in July but I've been getting spotting for the last 5 months so essentially I can have it out whenever. Once it's removed I don't intend on taking any other contraception.

I was wondering if any of you are bigger girls? What challenges lay ahead? I know my fertility may be effected by my size but equally it may not be! Should I wait until I am a much healthier size? That might be years - I find it so hard to be motivated. I desperately want to be a mother but even that doesn't motivate me enough to lose weight! I didn't come here to be judged by anyone, though I am happy to hear about why it might be dangerous for me or the baby to TTC.

SpunBodgeSquarepants Sat 31-Dec-16 17:02:23

Mate, I could have written that post myself.

I had my DS back in February 2014. I started a calorie counting diet in May 2012 when I was 17 stone 4, and got down to 13 stone 10 by December that year, where I too fell off the wagon - although luckily my weight stayed at just under 14 stone till I fell pregnant on my 2nd cycle TTC in June 2013.

Well, I had a perfect pregnancy and although I did end up having an EMCS my DS was born healthy and perfect.

In May 2015 we decided to start TTC a second. My weight has gone up to just below 18 stone. But even that want for another baby was not enough motivation for me to stick to a diet for more than 2 weeks. It took NINETEEN months to fall pregnant this second time - I just got my BFP a week ago, and I am now 18 stone 4. And honestly, I'm worried. I'm worried that my weight is affecting my hormones and I won't carry to term. I'm worried that the sonographer won't be able to see my baby because of my huge tummy. I'm worried I won't be able to see my baby move through all this fat. I'm worried that the midwife will look down her nose at me. I feel so selfish for not doing something about my weight sooner. As soon as I got my BFP I have changed my diet dramatically - no more crisps and chocolate and cheese - I'm eating a balanced diet with a ton of fruit and veg. But I'm worried it's too little too late.

Honestly - I would try to lose some weight first. It'll put your mind at ease knowing you tried your best to provide a healthy body for your baby to grow in.

How old are you by the way?

NickMyLipple Sat 31-Dec-16 17:12:48

I'm 27 smile

Yeah, I completely hear what you're saying- and actually I do want to provide a healthy body for my baby to grow in, it's just finding that motivation to do it. And I know I can because I've done it before - just need to concentrate on doing it again!

physicskate Sat 31-Dec-16 17:33:58

Here is some guidance from the NHS:

Looks like serious complications can result. My sister had to have an emergency caesarian because of her weight as baby was not coping during labour. Increased risk of gestational diabetes is also considered an increased risk of obesity at some point in life for the baby.

Hopefully this helps with motivation. While I am not obese, I am a bit overweight (BMI about 27) and also finding it hard to motivate to lose weight (trying to lose a stone or so!).

MsJuniper Sat 31-Dec-16 17:50:18

I am also morbidly obese and ttc. Its been a horrible cycle of getting pregnant, having a mc, getting depressed, putting on weight, losing a bit, ttc again. This has gone on for over 2 years now (4 mc) and I am 40 so getting pretty desperate. I have a DC who I conceived while overweight but had a healthy pregnancy.

At 27 you can spend a good 6-9 months to make a real difference to your weight and then ttc healthily. I would never judge you because I've been there myself but I'd urge you to try this.

physicskate Sat 31-Dec-16 17:53:51

I ran across this some days ago. My real struggle with motivating is changing, going to some gym and than having to shower - the whole process taking hours every week! So I give excuses...

Here is one I cannot make excuses for:
At home, 7 mins a day. Granted I have had to modify a few moves as I am not yet strong enough!! Key word: YET!

haveacupoftea Sat 31-Dec-16 18:06:40

Hiya, I am obese and pregnant. I weighed 17.10 went on slimming world and got down to 17. Promptly got a bfp and here we are!

My pregnancy, now 18 weeks, has been very normal so far, no problems at scans (just found out the sex yesterday!) havent had my GTT yet but no glucose in urine etc

All the midwife said was my BMI is high and did I want referred to a weight management programme our trust is running. I said yes and now have access to a dietician, a physio, extra growth scans and have had scales put in my home, I get weighed every week.i had to take a high dose of folic acid in the first trimester and now take a baby aspirin daily with my pregnacare.

I have put on 6lb in the 18 weeks since getting pregnant (3lb of this in the last week since Christmas!) Which is more than I would like at this stage. So I am off to Slimming World on Monday to get me back on track. I would like to see my weight at under 18 stone at 40 weeks.

Yes there can be complications, as with any pregnancy, but the NHS will work with you to manage the risks, especially if you work with them and are willing to do everything you can yourself.

SpunBodgeSquarepants Sat 31-Dec-16 19:17:35

Haveacupoftea, can I ask what your reasons are for taking more folic acid in the first trimester? I am 5'4 and 18.4 stone, and I am taking 400mg of folic acid daily. Do you need to take more if you're overweight?

DailyFail1 Sat 31-Dec-16 19:22:04

I have never known an overweight or obese woman to have difficulty conceiving in my personal life (am half Indian and most Indian women I know are overweight or obese when they fall pregnant). Then I started having problems and the first thing GP mentioned was my weight, and he was so opposed to thinking about anything else that my actual diagnosis was delayed. I have pcos. That is the cause of my difficulty ttc, not the fact that I'm 2kg overweight!!!

DailyFail1 Sat 31-Dec-16 19:23:42

Spunbodge - Obese women (with bmi over 35) metabolise folic acid differently due to their weight, so they need more to offer the same protective effect against folate related fetal problems.

SpunBodgeSquarepants Sat 31-Dec-16 20:38:43

Dailyfail1, is it worth me taking double then? It's not possible to take too much folic acid is it?

DailyFail1 Sat 31-Dec-16 20:46:53

You shouldnt take more than 600mg. That's about the same as you'll get from a standard folic acid only supplement plus a b vitamin with added folate. Wouldn't take more than 600mg as it can cause severe constipation.

haveacupoftea Sun 01-Jan-17 02:33:15

spunbodge the dose for women with high BMI is 5mg which is only available on prescription - ring your GP surgery for advice smile

haveacupoftea Sun 01-Jan-17 02:35:58

Ps if you have any any other worries PM me and I will try to reassure you about your scans and things smile

lightcola Sun 01-Jan-17 02:52:08

I was around 20stone for both pregnancies and had no problems conceiving of during pregnancy/child birth. That saying it wouldn't hurt to try and lose some weight and start taking your folic acid now

SpunBodgeSquarepants Sun 01-Jan-17 08:43:56

Thank you haveacupoftea smile

laurzj82 Sun 01-Jan-17 08:54:31

Not ttc but I was 18 st when I fell pregnant with dd now 3 That's very very very overweight for me as I'm 5 2 with a tiny frame naturally. Obviously pregnancy is hard but seriously I felt like shiiiite and I'm convinced it was the weight that made it so much harder. I had awful SPD and was on crutches sleeping on the sofa for the last 8 weeks. Ended up having GD and injecting insulin 4 times a day from 28 weeks. Failed induction at 38 weeks due to GD resulting in EMCS. Then because of where my stomach overhung I kept getting repeated infections and the wound didn't heal over until my DD was 14 weeks. I don't regret anything about having my gorgeous DD but I do wish I had lost weight first. I've said I won't have another unless I can get my weight down to a more healthy level.

flumpybear Sun 01-Jan-17 09:03:21

It's definitely worth dropping a few kg if you're overweight and having difficulty TTC but you've not even tried yet so personally, if you're fit and healthy I'd try to cut out too much crap, perhaps be honest with yourself about the crappy calorific food you have and just limit it for a while, but still have some as it keeps you sane wink. My indulgence is wine!!! I gave it up completely but that's just me (not now lol - still love wine)!

I was about a size 16 TTC and found when I went to the gym regularly it was not a problem getting pregnant (many MMC but we got there in the end)
Good luck!

LadyBunnyFluff Sun 01-Jan-17 09:07:48

Just wanted to say; I was the same size as you OP when I fell pregnant withiut actively trying (due this week). I have no gest. diabetes and no other weight related complications.

My weight has only been mentioned about three times and when I told midwife I was surprised that I had managed to get pregnant at all at this weight she responded (almost laughing) that she hears this all the time and wasn't convinced high weight had much effect on fertility l, it was more likely Yo-Yo dieting that effected fertility etc. I don't know how much truth there is to that but felt I should share.

As PP posters say tho no harm in trying to lose weight and taking supplements etc.

NickMyLipple Sun 01-Jan-17 12:38:34

Thank you for your advice, it's super helpful. Will my GP prescribe folic acid when you start TTC? I think I'm going to nail slimming world for about 6 months, have the implant out when it's due, continental with slimming world and DTD and see what happens...!

NickMyLipple Sun 01-Jan-17 12:40:07

Continue, not continental!

Good luck Fluff

Also other supplements - do you take pregnacare/similar? Do you start those before BFP?

lovelearning Sun 01-Jan-17 15:15:14

I do want to provide a healthy body for my baby to grow in, it's just finding that motivation to do it.

Welcome to the Mumsnet Weight Loss Support Group

EvieSparkles0x Sun 01-Jan-17 18:31:03

Ive ballooned to a size 16 - 18 after having DD 15 months ago. We've decided to start trying for another and I definitely want to lose weight first, but with the focus on getting my body healthy for the pregnancy. I was a bit overweight when I got pregnant with DD and was worried it would be mentioned but there were never any problems. If I got pregnant right now however I would be worried about my weight and my diet.

I honestly think it's worth overhauling your lifestyle as pregnancy does take its toll on your body. It's also worth getting into a routine that you can continue into your pregnancy, rather than having to suddenly eat completely differently/take up exercise. Plus all the things you mentioned about scans etc would bother me too. Being 3 stone heavier than I was the first time round and knowing how hard it is on your body to have a huge bump, I definitely know I'll be more comfortable and confident shifting some pounds first !

perfectpinkstar Sun 01-Jan-17 23:13:24

Hi everyone. I'm overweight (currently at hunts under 16 stone which is my heaviest I've ever been). We are looking to TTC from Feb onwards. I'm relatively healthy in terms of I don't smoke (gave up 5-6 months ago) and rarely drink. I eat healthily but the weekends are a killer for me. This is when we have our treat meals although my hubby has recognised this needs to stop to help us lose weight and aide us in TTC. I've known 2 or 3 very overweight ladies who have gotten pregnant so am hopeful my weight isn't as bigger issue as I think and whilst losing weight am going to not stress or worry as this will obviously have an impact on TTC too

Good luck to you all xx😘

MrsCharlieD Mon 02-Jan-17 19:21:37

I am a size 26 and have a 2.6 yo ds. He was an unexpected but welcome pregnancy as we'd been having unprotected sex for years with no bfp and had resigned ourselves to thinking it was never going to happen. In terms of my pregnancy I was extremely lucky to have a straightforward pregnancy with no issues or complications. Scans were a bit more difficult, I had an early scan vaginally for a clearer view but after that had abdominal scans as normal. It was occasionally put on my notes that scan was difficult due to patient but not always. I had a consultant led pregnancy which basically meant I saw a doctor 3 times during my pregnancy, I believe she would have been more involved if I'd had any complications.

I went a week overdue before going into labour naturally. I stayed at home until the second stage and then had a natural delivery in hospital with only gas and air.

I can honestly say I was treated with respect and kindness by all the midwives and hcp I met and I feel proud to have had a healthy pregnancy and the birth I wanted.

There are undoubtedly additional risks and you may or may not have them. Coincidentally we are now trying for dc2 and I am joining slimming world because running after a toddler is knackering and I don't think I can do pregnancy and toddler at this size. I want to get here for my family and I'd like a home birth next time which I couldn't have cat this size. I wish you luck in your ttc journey x

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