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Worried about conceiving....help?!?

(3 Posts)
missambi16 Fri 16-Dec-16 20:14:36

Hi all

This is my first posting on the site. I'd just like some advice and maybe for someone to share their experiences if you've had similar issues as me

I was on the pill just over 3 and a half years ago and came off as I'd tried 3 different ones and they just didn't agree with me. I used to have very regular periods maybe only ever 2 days early or late on my 31 day cycle. <br />
Since coming off the pill I still have periods every month I've never missed a period but my cycle is on average 30 to 33 days, however ever 3rd or 4th month I am late by at least a week.

Sadly me and my partner (lf nearly 5 years!) had a miscarriage in september 2014, when we were only 19. And before that I lost an baby when I was 16 before I met my current partner. Since then I've desperately wanted another.

Since may this year we have not being using any protection, as we decided to not try but if we conceived then great, if not then it would be okay. As he wants a baby but would rather it just happen without properly trying (as if it's meant to be it's meant to be sort of thing) I agreed if this was what he wanted to try then it was fine by me as long as we can properly try in the new year if it hadn't already happened ( new year as we are moving in 2 weeks into a new house, our house at the moment is tiny)

The most recent example being last month I was due on, on the 13th November. I didn't come on on that day. (The 2 previous months were 32 days and 33 day cycles so normal for me) I took a pregnancy test on the 19th as I have had this problem for ages I don't do a text until it gets to a week late. The test was negative, so we decided to wait a few days and then take another one. We took this one on the 24th, again it was negative. At this point I'd usually have come on in my past experiences I've only ever been 10 days late. I was feeling very tired and my boobs were a bit tender too. I then took another test on the 28th and again it was negative.
Then to our disappointment I did come on on the 29th. As you can imagine with the circumstances as stated above I was devastated and so was my partner. I'm getting very tired of being late as it give me especially hope that I could be pregnant, and my partner gets upset knowing how disappointed I get and how upset I get when I do eventually come on. It just feels like it will never happen for us and this just torments us to no end. I am at a loss and I don't know what to do when we do try properly in the new year. I don't know if I'm ovulating very late on the months my period comes late or if there's something more serious wrong with me.
I always eventually come on, but I always have a but of hope when I'm late. I'm getting to the point of feeling depressed when it comes around to being due on and I fear the disappointment. It is putting a bit of strain on the relationship as I am so emotional every 3rd or 4th month when it happens.

Please please if you have advice or you can share your experiences please comment.

HollyMay84 Fri 16-Dec-16 20:29:52

Hi missambi sorry to hear about your losses. There's a thread on here called ttc after miscarriage (#7) they're all lovely ladies and they've helped me a lot in the last few days.

In regards to your cycle do you temp or use opks? They can help you understand your cycles a lot more and it can take some of the stress away of not knowing when af is due

MouseLove Sat 17-Dec-16 10:55:56

So sorry you're going through this. It sounds like stress could be playing cruel tricks and delaying your periods. My advice would be to start tracking your ovulation. That will give you a clearer picture about when to either take a pregnancy test or expect AF. It might not always be the same time each month because technically you're still in the window of regulating after the pill (takes up to 12 months. )
Good luck and try to relax. You have 9 months to wait so another week won't hurt, only get excited once it's happened, then you'll have a happy surprise.

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