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How am I going to get pregnant when we don't have sex?

(9 Posts)
FeelingLikeItWontHappenForUs Sat 12-Nov-16 23:15:17

Evening all, not sure if this the right place to post but am looking for some advice please.

Partner and I are both in agreement that we want a baby, first for both of us. Problem is that my husband has many health issues which mean that we rarely have sex. I have done my research and know that we should be trying quite often especially around fertile times. We have had a chat about this but the frequency hasn't increased! I am 41 at the end of the month and aware that time is not on our side for this.

Once every couple of months just isn't likely to work is it? Any suggestions please or do I need to resign myself to the fact that this won't happen for us and we've left it too late? I have suggested timing it better once a month (he's not keen, not spontaneous).

We haven't used contraception for a year now, I think it's just frequency that is the problem!

OohhThatsMe Sat 12-Nov-16 23:18:52

Are you able to live without having sex, OP? There are going to be many years ahead of you if you have children together.

BertieBotts Sat 12-Nov-16 23:20:43

Does he actually want a baby? It doesn't sound like it. I can understand low frequency but complaining about sex not being spontaneous? That's how you make a baby... Unless you're very frequent anyway you do need to plan and time it.

FeelingLikeItWontHappenForUs Sat 12-Nov-16 23:20:56

It's something I am kind of resigned to in honesty. I would like more but it's just not to be with him, due to physical health issues. I have read a lot of threads asking that very question lately!

SpeakNoWords Sat 12-Nov-16 23:21:38

I have a very unromantic suggestion (sorry) which is to ask him to provide you with a sample on the necessary days, and for you to self-inseminate. Is that a possibility?

FeelingLikeItWontHappenForUs Sat 12-Nov-16 23:21:46

He says he does Bertie. Perhaps that's the real issue but he just won't say. It was my suggestion but he agreed.

FeelingLikeItWontHappenForUs Sat 12-Nov-16 23:22:17

I suggested that speak, he wasn't keen on that either! Maybe Bertie is right

SpeakNoWords Sat 12-Nov-16 23:28:02

I think, in your DHs situation, if I really did want a child, but couldn't have sex as often as necessary due to health issues, then that would be my next step and I'd be happy to give it a try. So maybe he is more reluctant than he's let on so far.

FeelingLikeItWontHappenForUs Sat 12-Nov-16 23:31:22

Thank for your advice ladies, it's much appreciated. I think Weneed another conversation! Am going to delete the thread now in

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