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38 and going try for number 3 - any advice?

(153 Posts)
orangeistheonlyfruit Tue 23-Aug-16 14:50:54


We have 2 already and with a 8 year gap to the youngest we've decided we'd love a third.

so really do I need to get the ovulation sticks? Take temperatures?! All new to this feel like there are lots of new acronyms and I've no idea what they mean lol.

Sorry if my post is a bit vague I guess we have been waiting for the right time and now we're here, and I'm like ok! Aside from the lots of shagging what else do I need to know?


EmmaWoo1605 Tue 23-Aug-16 22:05:51

Hi! I am also 38, trying for number 3, and new to all this! I have 2 boys age 12 and 10 from my previous marriage. Remarried last year and would love nothing more than to have a baby with my new husband. We've been trying for around 8 months now, but just been tracking roughly when I'm ovulating using an app. I've now gone down the route of buying a load of cheap ovulation tests on eBay. I'm slowly becoming more and more obsessed, hence the reason I'm on forums now!

I've never really tried for a baby before...the boys just happened (but I was a lot younger then I guess!). I'm amazed by how much this stuff can take over your life! Maybe we should keep each other company given that were in such similar situations!

In the meantime, the lots of shagging theory seems the way forward! grin


orangeistheonlyfruit Tue 23-Aug-16 23:08:33

Hi emma it's strange isn't it being older and not realising it's not the same as being in the 20s. Did you know we have been purposely not trying because we want a summer baby? But reading all the other stuff makes me reload we would have been really stupid.

What app is it? I don't want to get all bogged down with it all but maybe I need to be smarter you know? We shag all the time but never even thought of its the right time. I'm still on the pill as it feels strange to say ok I have stopped taking it.

How are you finding it? I don't feel like an older women do you? smile

lousylear Wed 24-Aug-16 06:29:41

If you're on the pill you would probably benefit from using an app like Ovia or Fertility Friend.
I am 41, ttc for #4 (#1 with new partner). I have DD 12, DD 10, DS 8. I am doing temps and cm check as I had coil in for 6 months with no AF and no clue when I ovulate. The app helps you plot everything. I'm only on cycle #1. If I'm not pg this month I'm going to get some opks. I'm hoping it won't take me long to conceive as I'm not getting any younger.
FX for both of you.

orangeistheonlyfruit Wed 24-Aug-16 20:18:33

Thanks lousy I have downloaded that app. I need to take more notice of things evidently! Opks?

lousylear Wed 24-Aug-16 20:35:16

Ovulation prediction kit. I've just ordered one off eBay in case I'm not pg. basically you poas each day from around cd10. When you get a positive line you dtd! I dtd every other day anyway but I'm going to try opks as I'm intrigued as to when I actually Ovulate.

SleepDeprivedAndCranky Wed 24-Aug-16 20:40:35

The most important thing is to start taking folic acid for at least 3 months before ttc and continue for the first few months of pregnancy as it helps prevent birth defects.

EmmaWoo1605 Wed 24-Aug-16 21:14:02

Hi Lousy...nice to 'meet' you too!
Orange...opks are the ovulation tests...the apps will help you to have an idea of roughly when you're due to ovulate, so if you want to use them you can start testing around the right time. I've only got them to try for the first time this cycle so will be using them for the first time next week. When you do come off the pill you'll notice the signs of ovulation too...Ewcm is a very obvious one for me (egg white cervical mucus) and I get some period like pain too.

I came off the pill middle of last year and it took a while for my cycles to even out, so if you really want a baby I wouldn't hesitate to stop taking it if I were you!!

I agree with you, I definitely don't feel like an older woman! It's really just assume that because you've had kids already you'll have no problem at all. And who knows, maybe you won't have any problems!

Us older (hmm) ladies can do it I'm sure!!


EmmaWoo1605 Wed 24-Aug-16 21:17:37

Oh yes of course sleepdeprived ...folic acid is a must!
Been taking it for a year now hmm


lousylear Wed 24-Aug-16 21:27:42

Yes def folic acid. I've been taking it a while now. I do not think of myself as old. I am fit and healthy, I run 3 times a week and am hardly ever ill. However I am aware that my chances of conceiving are lower than 10 years ago. Also we would really like two as there will be at least a 9 year age gap. FX for us all.

PacificDogwod Wed 24-Aug-16 21:32:09

Take folic acid and Vitamin D - those two are no recommended for all women TTC.

I had my 4 boys between 37 and 44 - never any problems conceiving, but had several MMC (before the first successful pregnant).

So, go for it. Unprotected intercourse during the middle third of your monthly cycle (provided you are relatively regular).
Fertility 'falling off a cliff' after 35 is a myth and none of us know what our fertility is like until we try to use it, whether we are 22 or 42.
Personally, OPK would drive me round the bend…

Good luck thanks

EmmaWoo1605 Wed 24-Aug-16 21:46:46

That's great to know pacific...there's hope for us all!


FuzzyOwl Wed 24-Aug-16 21:51:14

I find most apps either work for the average woman (one who has a 28 day cycle, is regular and always ovulated on day 14) or take several cycles to get to know you, but I would never rely on them.

For me, I have found ovulation sticks the best way to get pregnant and they have worked for me three times in my late thirties and hopefully will again next year when we try for our last baby.

Good luck.

elly79 Wed 24-Aug-16 21:53:18

HI all
I am 37 and tentatively TTC no3.
I have two daughters aged 4 and 5. I used OPKs with my first and they worked - i am a scientist so loved knowing what was going on! I haven't used them yet this time but might get some for next month. I think i have prob just ovulated in the last week so not sure what may or may not have happened...... I keep telling myself i will 'just see what happens' 'no pressure' etc etc but actually quite keen for it to happen now!

EmmaWoo1605 Wed 24-Aug-16 22:01:21

Hi elly and's so easy to go from tentatively trying to full blown obsessed! I defo think using opks is worth a try...I'm gonna be trying them for the first time this cycle.


orangeistheonlyfruit Wed 24-Aug-16 22:12:11

Hi everyone. Thanks for your posts. God now it's the time to start trying I'm getting all freaked out. Doing the baby stuff again. Like I want to have another baby but at the same time - scary!

EmmaWoo1605 Wed 24-Aug-16 22:26:26

It is scary orange! I've tried to talk myself out of wanting another several times but I guess the power of Mother Nature is just too much!

Wish you, and everyone, the best of luck!


orangeistheonlyfruit Wed 24-Aug-16 23:29:00

Thanks Emma. I know there are magical moments ahead and why am I jumping to only see the scary unknowns! I keep bringing up the hard times with dh so he remembers what we are in for, I want him to be totally on board or not at all.

Good luck too smile

Ninasimoneinthemorning Wed 24-Aug-16 23:31:24

Are you bst shit crazy??!

I'm 37 and 30 weeks and this has been my hardest pregnancy yet! Even my arms are tired. Never a fucking gain !

<< good luck>>

EmmaWoo1605 Thu 25-Aug-16 07:33:03

Haha I think we must be!! I ache plenty as it is without even being pregnant! What are we thinking?!! shock

elly79 Fri 26-Aug-16 14:45:05

Oh no don't say that!! My friend has just had her second at 37 and said the same thing.... I was 33 last time which seems like a teenageer now basically..... Although nothing can be worse than 2 under 2 and I won't be doing that again so i keep thinking it will actually be much nicer this time around having the older two at school. Almost like the first time all over again.... (ha ha!!).
My biggest (and unfounded) worry is multiple births.... I teach triplets who were a natural third pregnancy!! IMAGINE THAT!!! 1,2.....5

one in about a thousand million though i am sure.

I am in the 'waiting' part now and if i am not PG this month i will try OPK properly.


lousylear Fri 26-Aug-16 15:24:11

I'm the same as you Elly. Mine are all at school. Will be nice to have a baby again. If I'm not pg this cycle I will be trying opks. I'm cd32. No sign of AF or bfp.

EmmaWoo1605 Fri 26-Aug-16 20:27:07

Yeah I did 2 under 2 when I was late 20's....just awful!! Omg to multiples now!! Apparently over 35 the chances of twins increases massively...yikes!!

So where are you all cycle wise? I'm just coming up to the fertile time on cycle 8...just started using the Ovia app which I've found fantastic, and have started with opks. Next af due for me around 12th sept (if she's on time this month...which she hasn't been recently!!)


lousylear Fri 26-Aug-16 22:05:22

Yes I had 2 under 2 in a house falling to pieces and a grumpy hubby. I got pnd and didn't realise til years later. Went on to have 3 under 5 as well! Now starting again with new partner I'm really excited about the future. FX for us all. Really hoping I'll know soon one way or the other.

lousylear Fri 26-Aug-16 22:09:01

I'm cycle #1, cd 32, 9 dpo.

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