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Emotional and confused - new job and TTC

(4 Posts)
Luxnuova Fri 10-Jun-16 23:02:35

We've been trying to conceive number 2 for over a year now, and we have had 2 MC along the way, one MMC at 11 weeks, which was horrible. We started trying again seriously last December, as it took me several months to get over the D&C and to feel like trying. Last two MC we conceived first time trying, which was unexpected. Now, nothing for 6 months. I'm 37 and my DD is 4.5 and we don't have a huge amount of time, so I was planning on just hoping all worked out for the best (naive probably).

Anyway, to complicate matters, last month I was offered my dream job - it's a fixed-term contract (2 years) in a profession I thought I was no longer competitive in, so it's both terrifying and exciting for me. I applied even though we were TTC, as it felt too good an opportunity to pass up, and it would open up awesome future opportunities also.

This month, first at the job, I was convinced I was pregnant. I felt a bit conflicted, but excited. But, just took a test and BFN. Now am gutted. And also, suddenly everything feels more complicated.

We have been thinking of trying Clomid, but it feels like a major thing to get into at the start of a stressful new job. Also, there's the temptation to try to control the timing now, because it would make things a HEAP easier if I got pregnant not this next month, but in four months' time.

What would you do? Just keep trying, hoping for the best? Try Clomid and risk major emotional weirdness in new job? Or wait for a few months, and then try Clomid? I just feel like there's so much risk involved in delaying, and am very superstitious about trying to 'control' things, and thus jinxing whatever chance we do have. Weird thread, sorry, but any advice gratefully received.

haveacupoftea Fri 10-Jun-16 23:26:07

If this doesn't feel like the right time for you, there is no harm in putting off ttc for a couple of months til you are settled in and feel ready for it.

Best of luck in your new career! star

Luxnuova Fri 10-Jun-16 23:34:29

Thank you so much for replying haveacupoftea, I just feel so alone right now. I was so convinced I was pregnant before the test this morning that I was visualising how I would tell my new boss! I just feel like time isn't on our side and it might be tempting fate to wait. I guess we could at very least see a specialist and talk about Clomid...

MyPath Thu 25-Aug-16 06:18:50

Luxnova thanks for posting, I can relate to what you are saying. I am about to leave a permanent job for a fixed term job (16 months) - better role, money, makes more sense for my future career I think. Have been TTC for 19 months now since return of my period after DD was born. Secondary infertility sucks. Anyway, already feeling guilty in case I can't complete the fixed term contract due to a 2nd baby. Just keep on reminding myself (1) baby matters more and (2) don't base my career decisions on an imaginary baby.
SO... How is your new job?? Would love an update

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