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TTC after miscarriage thread #5

(1002 Posts)
InsufficientlyCaffeinated Thu 09-Jun-16 11:43:32

New thread for all navigating the bewildering world of trying to conceive after a miscarriage. Whether you have dc or are ttc your first, all are welcome here. We share the positive, the negative and the down right confusing.

For reference here's thread 4

AmyB1986 Thu 09-Jun-16 12:25:15

Thanks for the new thread IC hope you're ok x

InsufficientlyCaffeinated Thu 09-Jun-16 12:44:22

I'm muddling along Amy. In a 'can't be bothered with it all' phase at the moment. Entering in to my fertile week but really can't be bothered with dtd or paying attention to cm and cervix position. Taking vitamins when I remember rather than religiously everyday. Abandoned temping. Maybe it's the time of year, heat makes me grumpy. But I'm still here so haven't given up completely!

Read your post at the end of the last thread. Hope you get the work situation sorted. Will having a better job title reflect well for the future or is it really not worth it? I negotiated to have junior dropped from my title a few years back so that I could eventually move to another job without having to move sideways in to another low position. I was doing tasks far above a junior because of staff shortage so even though I could only get a tiny pay rise, it helped to have a better title for moving on

Alb1 Thu 09-Jun-16 13:37:59

Thanks for the new thread IC

Apologies in advance for the moany all about me post but I feel I need abit of a slap today. I'm already getting me stressed that I haven't had a positive opk yet even though it's not even been 6 weeks since I gave birth and I haven't had a period yet, and I decided to do a pregnancy test yesterday and today cos I feel off (even though logically I no its ibs playing up cos I'm stressed) yesterday's was negative but today's has the absolute tinyest squinter of a line, which is clearly an evap line cos the test looks like a duff, the whole test panel is a slightly different colour to the one I took yesterday and it took longer than normal to start testing and even show the control line. Added to that we only dtd for the first time since giving birth 11 days ago and it was only 2 days after I'd stopped bleeding, so even if I had happened to ovulate and conceive that day by sheer fluke id only by 10dpo anyway so a positive is incredibly unlikely. But thanks to that sodding like iv already been to 3 shops trying to find a first response one to test again, and none of them had it so I'm planning to spend my afternoon driving round with my poor DS trying to find one, just so I can pee on it this evening (cos I can't wait) see its negative cos it won't be fmu and then probably repeat the same crazy routine tomorrow blush

Sorry for the long ranting post, especially when iv only posted a couple of times before, but I can't admit my crazy antics to anyone in RL and I no all you lovely ladies understand how crazy ttc can make you. I'd forgotten what all this was like sad

BertieBotts Thu 09-Jun-16 14:10:39

Hi all, settling in and finding a comfy spot. I feel like this thread has lovely beanbags and hot water bottles and blankets to snuggle in.

I am 6dpo today and keep falling asleep and feeling crampy so fingers crossed... but I'll wait until the end of next week to test I think.

Alb do you know if your HCG levels have returned to 0 yet following your last pregnancy? That can take some time and might be preventing ovulation. Also of course a small amount of HCG in your system can trigger a pregnancy test.

Alb1 Thu 09-Jun-16 14:15:54

Bertie yeah I did a test 2 weeks post birth and again at the weekend and both were negative so I'm safe on that one. I posted the test on countdown to pregnancy because I'm nuts and someone on there has said its positive too, I shouldn't have posted it, it's just added to the crazy!

Fingers crossed for you bertie deffiently a good idea waiting to test if you can resist, no good comes from early testing

BertieBotts Thu 09-Jun-16 14:29:24

OK. I love countdown to pregnancy! It is a bit crazy making though.

It's rubbish when the test is a duff. I had that last time. It did turn out to be a positive in the end though but I couldn't have trusted that original one alone.

JustineLittle Thu 09-Jun-16 14:39:03

Fingers crossed for you both!
I didn't get pregnant in the first cycle after my late mc. I think my body wasn't ready as my first period was awful.
I mc'd early in the second cycle again and am going to ttc again.
I'm too impatient to take a break!

InsufficientlyCaffeinated Thu 09-Jun-16 15:40:32

Countdown to Pregnancy is dangerous! Whenever I'm in symptom spotting mode I end up on there & really isn't good for me, so addictive!
Good luck Alb I hope that squinter is the real thing and not just a rubbish test.

Bertie I know it's summer but I'd happily have snuggily blankets & a cosy hot water bottle. Much rather cosy warm than sweltering sweaty warm!

Good luck Justine I didn't bother taking a break either. It would have involved either using condoms temporarily or stopping having sex which would just ruin the momentum I think.

JustineLittle Thu 09-Jun-16 15:54:58

Thank you IC!
I think I'm lying to myself saying that I'm not obsessed with ttc. I can't help counting down the days till my ovulation and another opportunity to try.
It's very hard for me to believe now that it will just happen and the 3rd attempt will be successful. If it's not, at least I hope to be tested or get help to conceive.

jodiebee664 Thu 09-Jun-16 17:19:22

Hi all,
Not been on in a while as been trying to stay off the Internet and hope the time passed quickly but I'm 5+2 today and just started bleeding. I feel devastated and really hope it's not mc. We were so happy and had lived in a little bubble for the past week smiling at each other and DH kissing my tummy - am just so hopeful this one would stick!

Merdie Thu 09-Jun-16 19:12:48

Just checking in and also offering a handhold to you Jodie - my friend bled through her latest pregnancy and gave birth to a healthy girl after 3 MCs in a row ... It CAN happen. flowers fingers crossed from here.

purpleviolet1 Thu 09-Jun-16 19:12:51

So sorry to hear that Jodie, is it a lot of bleeding or more spotting? Did you manage to get in touch with EPU this evening? It is heartbreaking isn't it but hopefully it's really not the end. Bleeding between 5-6 weeks is fairly common I was told. I had it in my first pregnancy and it was all fine at that point. Picked up a heartbeat at 6 weeks.

For those of you who asked, I don't track ovulation or cm. I'm not sure when the sac passed exactly. I was 6 weeks. Bleeding started on May 22and and stopped 1w3d later on 1 June. HCG was 129 on 28may and bloods repeated a week later on 3rd June they had dropped under 5. I'm not sure one can 'start' a cycle with even a little bit of HCG in their system.

Mrs really hope you start to feel better soon. What are you doing to help yourself relax? It's important to take time out.

Amy - congrats on the job offer. Hope you manage to work it out smile

Albie hope you aren't driving yourself mad - I totally would be. Will be watching the thread closely for your updates! really hope it's good news for you.

IC thanks for the new shiny thread. Definitely getting comfy with my feet up here. Hopefully we can all graduate from this thread quite quickly!

What's countdown to pregnancy?? In scared to google it in case I get addicted...

I can't remember who said but I'm fasting now for the month of Ramadan and hopefully lose a little weight along the way! Afterwards I'll be going back to 5:2 diet - I successfully lost half a stone and felt great but then put it back on during the last pregnancy/miscarriage. Amazing how much difference half a stone felt...

Brenna and others, hope you are all ok too smile

HopefulKate1980 Thu 09-Jun-16 19:12:53

No no no Jodie don't panic yet!!! It could be OK. Please stay little bean. How heavy? Any pain? It could be absolutely nothing and youll be fine.

Thanks for the new thread IC. I'll read everyone's posts now on the train and respond.


Mrsunsure123 Thu 09-Jun-16 19:38:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JustineLittle Thu 09-Jun-16 19:43:07

Jodie - I'm new here but I'm thinking of you. Hope it's all good xx

Mrs - I'm thinking to go to see my GP and check if they can do any tests on me for two consecutive mc's. I wouldn't mind any help of hormones, etc. I hope that all works for you!

jodiebee664 Thu 09-Jun-16 20:14:51

Thank you all so much for your kind words and reassurance - really does mean so much and has made me feel more positive...just managed to stop crying but you've set me off again (in a good way as it's so kind of you all)
Its been red and not a lot - just when wiping. I have had cramping but have had little cramping for a couple of weeks.
I called EPU but she just said see how bleeding goes and do a test in 2 weeks (I've already done one and obvs still showed a line) - I don't think they do anything for under 6 weeks? I'll call again next week and beg to be seen based on having an mc before - waiting will be tough!
Thanks again!

Waitingformiracles Thu 09-Jun-16 20:52:57

jodiebee Im thinking of you. The waiting time is horrible flowers

mrsunsure glad to hear they are listening to you and have offered something else that might help.

Ive not been posting much recently as im feeling a bit frustrated just now as ever since the mc my cycles have been even more messed up than usual. CD36 and I thought I had finally ovulated at the weekend but then my temps dropped again so still waiting. Feel like some of you are lapping me!

Grapefruit8 Thu 09-Jun-16 20:57:32

Evening all, just checking in- been lurking but haven't posted in a little while. Wanted to let you all know I've had a scan today and baby looking great, kicking it's little legs and moving round loads! Now 12&2, EDD 20th Dec so keeping fingers & toes crossed for a happy healthy baba in time for Christmas. Just wanted to say keep the faith & believe, I've found it hard & there's been so many tears but praying it all works out in the end 

jodiebee664 Thu 09-Jun-16 21:07:45

lovely news grapefruit

thanks waiting sorry I can't offer any advice, I never got the hang of the temping thing. I had mittelschmerz in March though and it made me realise i was ovulating a lot earlier than I thought before so used that as a guide.

Miami81 Thu 09-Jun-16 21:16:01

That's lovely news grapefruit.
Jodie you poor thing, hopefully it is just something of nothing and it all works out for you.
Thanks for new thread IC.
Good luck with Ramadan purple, did I read somewhere that it is longer then normal or something this year? The fasting in the summer must be very tough. It was me that was saying about the 7 lbs, yeah I think it makes a huge difference to how you feel even with dtd and feeling sexy in myself if that makes sense.

Whatsername17 Thu 09-Jun-16 21:44:46

Hi everyone. Hope you are all okay. I'm still lurking in the background. 7 weeks today. Midwife on Monday then a scan sometime next week. Daren't hope to be honest. I had a tiny bleed last week at 5+4. It happened after I checked my cervix for the 18th time in 10 minutes then stopped very quickly. Not sure what to think but just keep moving forward. Not checking any pregnancy websites or weekly updates like before. Just quietly hoping.

jodiebee664 Thu 09-Jun-16 22:00:30

Good luck whats. How do you even check your cervix? But maybe I shouldn't after what you said!

HopefulKate1980 Thu 09-Jun-16 22:18:27

Lovely news grapefruit and whats! You are our great white lights! Keep shining for us. And I count you in that too Jodie. Stay hopeful. It will be fine. If it is just when you wipe then that's a good sign.

I haven't caught up properly on everyone's news yet as I have only just got back from a meal at my parents but I will.

Hope everyone is ok.


jodiebee664 Thu 09-Jun-16 22:28:40

Thank you Kate, means so much flowers

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