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DH with ED :(

(7 Posts)
ButtonTum Wed 18-May-16 19:44:41

We are on cycle 2 of ttc baby #1.

Evidently the pressure has hit DH and he is having trouble sustaining and even managing to get, in some cases, an erection in both months. Anyone else's partner getting stage fright? He's too embarrassed to visit a GP or really talk about it with me and no amount of encouragement, physical or verbal, from me seems to make a difference.

He recently had a shocker at work (overlooked for promotion) so is feeling down on himself and will likely get over it but it's pretty difficult going, knowing how long we have waited (2 years) to be I the right place financially to begin ttc. Any advice?

Whatsername17 Wed 18-May-16 19:51:15

Do not tell him when you are fertile or ovulating. Try and spend as much time as possible doing things together, cuddling, kissing and having a giggle do that sex seems natural. When I conceived last time my dh asked if it was my fertile time when we started to get amorous and I lied and said no. We had the best sex ever and I conceived. Sadly I miscarried but I still employ the same tactics. Try and avoid making it all about the sex to alleviate the pressure.

physicskate Wed 18-May-16 21:28:22

My DH has never had a problem - until I let him know I was probably about to ovulate last month. We had dtd pre-positive opk, so we were covered anyway, and it was Friday after a long week at work for both of us. And now we are on cycle 2. So we aren't talking about opks or my chart anymore. In fact, he doesn't feel like talking about this ttc business much at all... hence why I come here!

ButtonTum Thu 19-May-16 08:26:03

Thanks guys, I'll maybe try not letting him know.

Thing is, we don't generally dtd that regularly outside of ttc so it's pretty damn obvious that when we get down to it that's the reason why.

I guess this is just a case for more bedroom action. Thanks x

Willberry Sun 22-May-16 01:37:44

Is it just since you've started ttc or has it been an issue before, maybe the reason you don't dtd that often. DH was on medication that caused problems in this department a couple of years ago and we kind of got out of the habit of dtd for a while, has taken ttc to get us back on track.

Maybe take some time to re establish intimacy without the pressure of ttc, just don't prevent and see what happens.

karryk Mon 23-May-16 07:30:13

Hello smile

You're definitely not alone x

We only managed to dtd once this fertile window (argh) - hubby has just started a new shift pattern so he was probably too tired and couldn't manage it. I actually felt worse for him than anything else. I echo the idea of dtd outside of the window where you can - pressure free and gets you back into the swing of it as it were.

My dh is on the brink of 40 so no doubt that might be affecting things also! I haven't mentioned viagra yet grin

ButtonTum Mon 23-May-16 21:05:28

Thanks all!

Wilberry it's just an issue since ttc remarkably so I think it's a lot to do with the pressure of performance.

Karry I agree & will try to dtd more this coming month regardless. Hope you're once was a lucky one for you!

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