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Aged 35 or over TTC #2?

(1001 Posts)
RememberToSmile1980 Mon 16-May-16 06:11:56

Hi ladies
I'm trying to conceive no. 2. My aim was to ttc from January of this year - however due to one thing or another (very stressful time at work!) I have not been giving it my all. I have now decided I need to focus on ttc no.2 as I am very conscious of the growing age gap! Please join for a friendly chat and to hopefully support each other!

Age - 35
Ttc - #2
CD - 21
DS - 3 years 10months!

Don't want to obsess about it! However I think it's inevitable!

RememberToSmile1980 Mon 16-May-16 16:19:10

Bump? Anyone?

beckiwiththegoodhair Mon 16-May-16 16:34:50

Hi there!! Your thread is looking a bit lonely, so let me keep you company hun, lol.
I am 39 and TTC number 3. I already have 2 kids who are both over 10yrs old. I had mirena coils for the past 10yrs, and this is my first cycle since removal. I am currently on cd16 and had a pos opk test on 10/05. DTD plenty around that time. Planning to test on 28/05.
I am already feeling a bit obsessive about it. DH is just like 'whatever' so im keeping my obsessiveness to myself! Im making a mental note of how im feeling and symptoms. Would be crazy if i get a BFP this month!!

RememberToSmile1980 Mon 16-May-16 17:45:39

Hi Becky
Thanks for replying!
I am just taking it easy but am worried it's going to take a really long time! Fingers crossed for you on the 28th!
I am not going to bother testing - I may just wait and see if AF turns up!

Letsgetreadytorumbleagain Mon 16-May-16 18:01:59


I'm 36 and we've just begun to TTC#2, my DS is 3 and a half so I feel like we should be getting on with it - but like you said I'm trying not to obsess about it!

I had 2 MMC before my son so I also have that in the back of my mind

RememberToSmile1980 Mon 16-May-16 19:53:02

Hi letsgetready,
Sorry to hear about your losses. Are you using OPK's? I find that I have used them on and off but not religiously as the husband is not keen on getting over anxious! Also not had chance to DTD much due to work stress. Glad it's the summer term now though! How long have you been ttc?

beckiwiththegoodhair Mon 16-May-16 20:57:41

Hi letsgetteady, sorry for your losses too. I had 2 m/cs also, one at 6wks before DD, then another after DD, i found out the week of my 12wk scan that baby had died at 6wks sad I didn't miscarry naturally, so had to go to surgery. I am worried about getting pregnant again at this age, worried it may happen again with me being older now.
I'm not even telling DH when my opk is pos as he isn't great at performing under pressure! So we are ttc but it's supposed to be relaxed! Lol

tinkwastaken Mon 16-May-16 21:49:40

Not quite over 35 but will be in a few months. TTC #3. DS is 6 and DD is 4 so also worrying about age gap. Started trying in January and got pregnant straight away but had a m/c a few week later. Started trying again straight away but obviously nothing so far. Was determined not to obsess this time but that went out window after m/c, sort of feel that I'm never going to see two lines again, don't know why but I am convinced I won't conceive again. If that's the case then I am very lucky with my 2 wonderful DC.

beckiwiththegoodhair Tue 17-May-16 04:51:20

Hi Tink. Sorry to hear of your loss too, i am sure you will see those 2 lines again soon. My youngest is 11 and eldest 13, so there will be a 14yr gap between any new baby and my DD by the time it is born, Lol. It is hard not to obsess, once you have made the decision to ttc, it's all you think about sometimes. Every HPT BFN is such a dissapointment. I never had AF for 10yrs due to Mirena, so my body is in shock atm i think!

Letsgetreadytorumbleagain Wed 18-May-16 08:53:52

Thanks ladies, sorry for your losses also Becki and Tink.

We have been TTC for 3 months now, although I'm not all together hopeful that we will end up with another child but I can't put my finger on why!

I have been using OPKs but like Becki I don't tell DH! I ovulated late this cycle, although I do have irregular cycles so I can never be too sure when it 'should' be.

I currently around 5dpo, with AF due around 28th xx

Monstamio Wed 18-May-16 13:12:17

Hello! Can I join please?

Age - 36
Ttc - #2
CD - 23
DD - 16 months

I promised myself I wouldn't get all stressy and obsessed this time around, but it's no use, I'm just as bad as last time so it will be good to have an opportunity to chat. I had a MMC at 12 weeks requiring surgery before my first child and I had another miscarriage two months ago. It's so much more common than you realise when you're first starting out ttc.

We pretty much failed to hit the fertile window this month - think we dtd three days before ovulation so there's an outside chance but I'm not holding my breath. Wishing you all lots of luck!

beckiwiththegoodhair Thu 19-May-16 10:47:20

Welcome Monstamio! Sorry to hear about your losses. It seems a miracle at times that anyone manages a successful pregnancy, the chance of a m/c no matter what age you are, are quite high. It's lovely to see the BFP pics that other ladies are posting, fingers crossed we get ours soon too! wink

RememberToSmile1980 Thu 19-May-16 18:56:56

Hi Monstamio,
Welcome aboard!
Sorry ladies - it's been a busy couple of days!
Sorry to hear about your losses - I guess we are all lucky to have a DC. I wonder how long it will take for us to have another baby in our arms!
I only Dtd once in this fertile window - so not counting on anything happening this month!
How are you Becki?

beckiwiththegoodhair Fri 20-May-16 06:18:34

I'm good thanks RememberTo, still got heavy bbs, which DH is quite liking and I have to say, I'm rather impressed with them myself too! Lol. One thing i have noticed the past few days is (embarrassing) an increase in poops, not a bad tummy, but having to go like 3x a day instead of once. I have not changed my diet at all, so maybe it's hormones?

Shrimpymummy Fri 20-May-16 15:18:16

Hello! Can I join you? Am 35, ttc no. 2 (Dd 2yrs), conceived in Feb this year but suffered a MMC and had an ERPC 5 weeks ago today.

Promised myself not to obsess over getting pregnant again, but I can't seem to fight the urge to symptom spot, despite not even having had a period yet since the MMC (and not having a clue when it would be due anyway). Trying to resist going down the OPK route and stay as relaxed as possible, but am pretty sure this resolve will crumble very shortly. So sorry for everyone else who has also experienced losses or is just struggling a bit with the wretched TTC process - hopefully we'll all have good news soon!

Penguin13 Fri 20-May-16 17:46:51

Hello all can I join?

Age: 36
TTC: #2
DD: 17 months (currently teething badly and doing her best to convince me having another child would be madness grin)

Had my implant out a few months ago and waiting for AF. Currently CD39 and wondering where my AF has got to confused almost 100% certain am not PG have still managed to p o about a million s

RememberToSmile1980 Sat 21-May-16 09:08:00

Hi Shrimpy and Penguin
Welcome to the thread!

Sorry to hear about your losses Shrimpy - hopefully you will get a sticky bean soon fx!

Penguin I've never been on the implant so cannot give you any direct advice unfortunately. However I'm sure AF will turn up as soon as your body adjusts.

Anyone doing anything interesting over the weekend? I am awaiting the dreaded AF! x

Shrimpymummy Sat 21-May-16 09:47:56

If this morning so far is anything to go by, the weekend will be spent alternating between reading Julia Donaldson books and watching Toy Story - meant to be going to a 2 year olds birthday party, but have some rotten lurgy, so think will probably abandon that plan...

beckiwiththegoodhair Sat 21-May-16 10:17:56

Hello to Shrimpy and Penguin! I hope May is a good month for you both. I have never had an implant, but did have a mirena coil (2 over the past 10yrs) which was removed in April. I have had what i believe was a 1 day AF on 01/05, then positive OPK on 10/05. DTD a few times around then, so its a waiting game until test date. Im waiting until 28/05. I think it must take a few
Months after having these kind of contraceptives removed, for your cycle to settle again. The not knowing where the heck you are is difficult. Wish i could stop obsessing, but it's no use! Lol

beckiwiththegoodhair Sat 21-May-16 10:21:56

Hi RememberTo we are going house hunting today. Living in a rented 4 bed atm, but looking to get back on the property ladder. Going to see some new property developments. Hope kids behave whilst we are there!! #alwaysembarrassme lol

beckiwiththegoodhair Sat 21-May-16 10:23:06

I forgot to say RememberTo hope AF doesn't get you x

Penguin13 Sat 21-May-16 11:04:41

Thanks for the welcome. I already had my first AF after removal which also tool ages to materialise but waiting for the 2nd to appear. Am sure after a few cycles things will settle down.

So sorry to all who have suffered losses. I had a mmc discovered at 13 weeks the first time I conceived before my successful pregnancy with DD. I know how painful and difficult it can be. I hope that you get your sticky beans soon.

Fingers crossed for you this month Becki and hope househunting goes well. Would be useful if they were old enough to be disarmingly honest about the properties you are viewing to avoid you looking too keen :-D

Sorry you're feeling rotten Shrimpy. Hope you get a chance to rest and recover. I feel for you being in the WTF cycle post ERPC. I've been there and like you I found it hard not to obsess.

Our day started at 4.15 am thanks to DD teething bloody molars. She just couldn't get comfy bless her so after an hour or so of trying we just got up. She is down for a nap now so going to try to catch up on some zzzzzz too!

Shrimpymummy Sat 21-May-16 12:41:36

Thanks! Planning on not moving much from the sofa today. Hope the house hunting goes well Becki.

WTF cycle is the perfect description of this Penguin - can't wait to get a better idea of what the heck's going on - being very impatient in the meantime. Oof, that's a brutally early start to the day - hope you get some rest!

IfAtFirstUDontSucceed Sat 21-May-16 13:28:19


I'm 36 (almost 37 😔) and we're TTC #2
DS is 3 now and took almost 6 years to have him with a couple of MCs thrown in.
I did get pregnant last January but found at a scan at 10 weeks that the baby had died!
We've not used any contraception for a good while but my libido has plummeted which isn't ideal hmm
Currently on CD15 and got a positive OPK on day 13, so fingers crossed!

beckiwiththegoodhair Sat 21-May-16 16:26:09

Welcome Ifatfirst, so sorry to hear about your losses. Trying for a successful pregnancy can be so heartbreaking. I hope you manage a sticky bean soon hun!

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