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Chemical pregnancy

(6 Posts)
elliej83 Mon 11-Jan-16 22:57:16

Hi everyone,

I've just had a chemical pregnancy after find out a week before I was pregnant.

I'd had a couple of days off work because I had a sickness bug unrelated to pregnancy. The day I went back in to work I started bleeding so I rang the doctors and they said to come in asap. I work in a professional role that is an hour and a half away from work and it was early in the morning so I didn't know what to do.

I ended up just leaving work in a bit of a mess and telling someone that the Drs had called and they wanted me to go back asap that day to repeat them.

I've ended up taking this week off work just to get my head round everything that's happened and to have another blood test to confirm the miscarriage. Although to be honest the amount of blood I've had unfortunately it's pretty evident now.

I'm really nervous about going back to work as I know everyone is going to ask me what's happened and why I've been off and I'm worried I'll burst in to tears. They know I'm back at the Drs Wednesday as everyone keeps asking me if I'm okay and I just don't know what to say. Even if I'm honest I don't know where to start. I just feel an idiot for running out of work.

Bugmuncher Mon 11-Jan-16 23:03:33

ellie I'm really sorry to hear that. What a horrible time for you. I guess it depends whether you mind work knowing that you're TTC. If you don't you could make up a story about them getting someththig mixed up and if you get upset you could say it was the worry that's left you feeling shaken? Sending you hugs x

elliej83 Mon 11-Jan-16 23:16:00

Thanks Bugmuncher. We weren't actually TTC at the time it wasn't expected as we get married in 6 months.

We had tried before though and we're going to wait until after married but have decided that we may as well start now as this may take some time!! I'll stick around here if I can figure out all the abbreviations confused

I'm really unsure what to do. I don't know if to just email my boss and say what's happened as I don't just want to appear flaky. He's very good and promoted someone 7 months pregnant so I know it wouldn't be an issue work wise. I'm just terrified I'll freeze the first time someone says "Are you okay?"!!!

Mslg Mon 11-Jan-16 23:16:19

This same thing happened to me. I ran out of my work in a complete panic the day I had my miscarriage. I ended up telling the HR person and my manager and they were so supportive.

Tears are ok, I wouldn't feel ashamed or embarrassed about that. I found that opening up about mine led to other women sharing smiliar stories which was comforting. Take your time and be kind to yourself. It's not an easy thing to go through or move on from quickly.

elliej83 Mon 11-Jan-16 23:22:38

Thanks Mslg. So sorry to hear you have been through the same panic.

What did you say to everyone else who asked? I'm terrible at lying i elaborate and give to much numbly detail sad

We have a lady who has been off for 6 months now after losing her little girl at 24 weeks so I wouldn't be the first. I think that's why I feel a fraud as I only new for a week so it's clearly a lot worse for her.

Mslg Mon 11-Jan-16 23:57:58

I'm sorry you are going through it as well, it's very hard 😞

Its a tricky one. Some people asked and I felt OK enough to pass it off with 'oh I just didn't feel great that day' and people just take your world for it. Others I confided in and got a bit teary but it was fine. They were kind and it helped me a lot to talk about it.

Try not to stress yourself out about it too much. Like you, I took a week off after mine and was dreading going back. You can say as little or as much as you want. People tend not to pry if it's obvious someone doesn't want to speak about something. Don't be afraid to let your feelings out though.

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