When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.
We are all a bit bonkers, worshipping the travelling womble conker, we rub the grad's bumps for luck and shag without scientific schmuck (Most of the time!) Its Just Shagging 56!(1000 Posts)
Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)
1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.
5. Thou shalt not be offended by the word vagina.
ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also known as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'
Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!
Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.
Doing a Kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).
POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit), or PIATLH (Tea light holder), PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage (Self explanatory)
ROC = Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Optional decorations include photographs of controversial political leaders.
JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.
Jizz in a bra = how we transport the jizz to the Sperm Queen
Shagging like Something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.
Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into TTC obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!
Contraband (or Cuntraband) = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.
Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!
Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP
SOTM = Shagger of the Month. Awarded with varying regularity to those viroids who go above and beyond EOD shagging in pursuit of that BFP
TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedingering!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!
Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'
Doing A Lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!
Miroid - The male compadre of a viroid
Cat - Compulsory
Skittletits - Killer molten painful tits and nipples
Ghost jizz/goat jazz - When the amazing foof sucks up all the jizz - achieved when coming at the same time/nearly the same time.
The link to Part 55 is HERE
The current Grads Fred is HERE
The current Mumming Fred is HERE
The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is HERE
The brilliantly pearl-clutchy Fred about 'how wooode' our Fred is darlings is HERE
Stats sheet is HERE
Recent research PROVING WE ARE RIGHT is HERE
We are the dark side of MN... Welcome!
Woop! New Fred!
TTC: Jan 2014 (long story)/July 2015 (short version)
DCs: DD, 4; DS forever 36/40
Fur babies: 1 stressy tabby
Place marking and cooking a 28 wk mini pretzel.
Also place marking with a 35 week Christmas pudding.
Shit the bed
Hello! Feather, 32, upduffed with peach sized 14 week little feather who was conceived quickly following a mc in June. Will be DC 1.
Hurrah, thanks black
Yep, going into the garden! I give them bloody loads of veg and eggs too. Cheeky feckers . I'm not surprised though, I was home early one day and saw their little girl jump over the fence and go straight into the chicken coop to take eggs a few months back!
TTC #1 since dec13 mc june14 @10 weeks
pud how are you 35 weeks? Where did that go?
This is my first thread, I've been here too long, I hope it's my last
Yay new thread!
TTC #1 since September 2015
So this is the 4th thread I've been on and 4 is my my lucky number so I have high hopes, because obviously that's how it works
Just I can't believe they actually go into your garden!! I presumed the tree was near the boundary and they could reach from their side. The cheek of some people! And how brazen to just tell you like that.
OMG that's horrendous! I'd be so tempted to put barbed wire or something up. <terrible neighbour> My parents used to tell me off if I climbed into next door's garden to get my ball back, never mind stealing food.
TTC: 13 months, currently TWOT-ing first cycle of Clomid.
Fur babies: 0, though I'm trying to persuade DH to get me a Mog plush toy for Christmas
That is full on stealing Just! I would be having a word!!
Black I have no idea how this happened ha ha. Gx this is a very lucky Fred for you.
It's probably my fault, we have got friendly with them and they are a bit over familiar. I should say something but I know I won't! They suggested we put a gate between our gardens last summer.
Hello all... Made it over the the new fred, hope everyone's well.
TTC #2, second cycle
DC: 1 DD
Gx this is a lucky Fred for a few of us, happy to be here with you all
Hello viroids! Hurrah for new Fred!
TTC #1 since june 2015, now on cycle #5
Furbabies: 1 mischievous corgi
pud I'm cd 30 now which isn't unusual, my cycles have been 32 days usually. But I had some bleeding after dtd on 31st which I assumed was ice bleeding, so going by a 12-14 LP AF should have arrived by now.... Hmm.
just well that is just naughty. Definitely time for some quince pinching (?quinching)
TTC #2 since June 2015 (cycle 6)
DC: 1 DD
Furbabies: 1 crazy moggie
just defo get some barbed wire - the cheek of it!
On cd18 now, gx something has happened this month. We have shagged every day since AF finished, don't think we can do much more than that! TWOT now, due on 27th Nov, so let me know if anny if you are having a pissy party around then!
Hello ladies, still lurking
DC: 0 step-DC: 2
Fur babies: 0
Feeling a bit embarrassed but I did a 10mlu test this morning. I'm pretty certain there was an almost invisible line on it but it was so feint I couldn't get a photo. I kept it and a couple of hours later it had got the teeniest bit darker. Just enough for me to be able to see it on a photo if I fiddled with the contrast
a lot. I'm going to do another super drug test tomorrow with FMU (today's test was second wee of the day) feeling really nervous as I wasn't expecting to get upduffed on first cycle wanted to get drunk at Christmas party and worried that I imagined the line and current line is evap. Eek!
Progesterone level was 38 - the clinic letter says >18 for ovulation, but the lab reference range says >30 - either way that's promising! So OPK, CM, temp and now progesterone all suggest icing, just the scan that didn't agree timing-wise. We haven't had as much sex as I'd have liked though. Planning on POAS on Friday, trying very hard not to get hope up.
runner really I should give you a hooya for testing so early but this is exciting! Good luck for Friday sock
TTC #1 since aug 2015, now on cycle #4
The witch due this weekend, feeling very bloated, right pelvic pain, hot flushes & needing to wee every 5 minutes. Trying not to get my hopes up, had the same symptoms my first cycle, but the witch came
after many bfns a week late
Sounds like a promising start to the new fred, gx corgi sock & runner.
ditsy that's some going, you must be exhausted now!
Sock that sounds very promising either way.
Eee gx for everyone testing this week, I'll be joking you toward the end of the week too. Hoping it's going to be the start of a very lucky thread all round.
What an exciting start. Will celebrate icing with a pissy party
Gx for you angel , keep and everyone else testing soon. Hate the waiting of the TWOT.
Ooh runner that's exciting!! Gx for the unicorn
frer are on bogof in boots
TTC: just lurking until after Christmas when hopefully things will be go! Just ordered super strength frolic acid from docs to start taking now
DC: one DD 9 months (a JSing baby!)
Fur babies: 3 cats
Frolic acid Zyla? Freudian slip or JS lingo?!
Vidroids, I'm in a little bit of a dilemma - I'm due to get flu vaccine in work tomorrow, I think they ask if there's a possibility you might be pregnant before giving the vaccine (from what I can remember from previous years). The chances are there'll be colleagues about, & asking to speak to the nurse privately will no doubt set tongues waging. What to do, what to do??
This thread is not accepting new messages.
Please login first.