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Cannot conceive and feel so low

(17 Posts)
mybluelunchbox Sun 12-Jul-15 12:34:12

We have b trying for DC3 for nearly 6 months and haven't been able to conceive yet. I had no trouble at all with DC1 and 2 and wasn't expecting this at all. I feel so low. I desperately want this baby. I keep thinking is there something wrong with me or DH. I read the cenception thread here and I didnot even understand half of the acronyms, things people do to chart/ track etc. I can't even decently work out my ovulation days. Anybody else in the same boat? I feel like a complete failure. sad

Withalittlesparkle Sun 12-Jul-15 12:44:48

6 months of trying doesn't really indicate you can't conceive just that the process is taking a little longer this time.

How long did it take you the first time? How regular are your cycles? Are you breastfeeding? Other than a lack of a positive pregnancy test is there anything else that makes you think you have a problem?

jollyjester Sun 12-Jul-15 12:49:42

Hi blue you sound pretty low. How is your other half feeling? I have no constructive advise to offer only that I know what your going through. Have you been to see your GP?

DD will be 4 soon and excitedly talks about being a big sister and it breaks my heart as things aren't happening. It doesn't help that SIL who is a decade older than me just gave birth and my sis is pregnant with her second child and her first is only a year old.

Maybe just keep having lots of sex!

CarrotVan Sun 12-Jul-15 12:50:45

Do you have a smartphone? If so there are lots of apps for tracking fertility like Ovia or Fertility Friend.

You can buy cheap ovulation prediction strips (OPKs) on Amazon/ ebay/ Poundland etc. They are strips that you dip into urine so you need a little cup to wee into. You use afternoon/evening urine. Use them once a day from the 10th day of your cycle (day 1 is the first day of your period) until you get a positive test result (where the test line is darker then the control line) and then you should ovulate in the next day or so.

You are fertile from around 5 days before a positive ovulation test to about 2 days after so have lots of sex from around cycle day 10 to 20 (unless you have really long or short cycles).

There are other ways of working it out like checking your cervix position, cervical mucus (cm) changes or basal body temperatures testing (bbt)

Heck5897 Sun 12-Jul-15 12:54:27

Go to your GP and ask him/her to arrange a day 21 progesterone test. That will show if you are ovulating well enough.

Heck5897 Sun 12-Jul-15 12:58:38

I had secondary infertility and it was heart breaking. The day 21 progesterone test showed that my eggs weren't mature enough. A drug called clomid has enabled me to have more children. One pill a day!

Heck5897 Sun 12-Jul-15 12:58:56

How old are you OP

mybluelunchbox Sun 12-Jul-15 13:38:12

Hello all,

Thank you for so many responses. I do feel pretty low. I am31 andDH is 42. I haven't been to the GP. Do you think they will take me seriously just after 6 months of trying? With DC1 and 2 I conceived straightaway.
I did breastfeed both times and DC2 is 7 now.
I will download the apps and see if that helps. I am currently on my period and will start using the apps as soon as I am over.
Thank you so much once again. I havent got anyone in RL that I could talk to about this. X

CarrotVan Sun 12-Jul-15 13:51:03

I'd be surprised if your GP did much at this stage. Track your cycles, have lots of sex in the middle third of your cycle, see how it goes

mybluelunchbox Sun 12-Jul-15 14:41:44

CarrotVan that's why I haven't been to the GP as I don't think they will be concerned at this stage. How long before it becomes I able for them to investigate?
Sorry for being so thick but what is the meaning of Middle third of the cycle?

NoArmaniNoPunani Sun 12-Jul-15 15:02:45

It took us 10months to conceive our first baby. We were told the GP would investigate after we'd been trying for a year. Don't worry, 6 months really isn't that long to TTC.

CarrotVan Sun 12-Jul-15 18:05:28

If your cycle is 30 days counting from start of period to start of next period then the middle third is days 10-20 which for most people will cover their fertile days and then some

Hellionsitem2 Sun 12-Jul-15 18:52:01

Why don't you go and ask for the day 21 progesterone test?

RooibosTeaAgain Sun 12-Jul-15 19:47:36

The guidelines where I live say gp's will do tests after 12 months of ttc if under 35, after 6 mons if over 35. Not sure if it varies in areas or if not first child.
After more than 3 yrs ttc1 and then after 12m ttc2 I went to the dr who said would do day 2/21 blood tests but that was all as would get no funding foe treatment as had a child so had to go private. However other areas/gp's may be more generous with their tests/treatments! I was 37/8.

rebbles Sun 12-Jul-15 19:54:38

I was confused at first but I would say download the Ovia by Ovuline app, start using it now whilst you are in period and fill in as much as you can about your previous period dates. also buy some ovulation test strips off amazon they are cheap and start doing them twice a day about 10 days after the first day your period came. have sex at least once a day if you can and don't worry! I also bought `conceive plus' fertility lubricant which I think did the magic trick for us as well as laying down with legs raised for 20 mins afterwards and drink loads of water so you're hydrated. xxxx

scienceteachergeek Sun 12-Jul-15 20:31:19

After we'd been trying EVERYTHING for 3months I knew things weren't right. My mucus never changed, ovulation sticks never showed a second line, cervix never went soft and temp never changed so I went to the doctors. I told her we'd been trying for a lot longer. I had all the tests done etc and it proved I was right. I wasn't ovulating. So now, 9months later I've just had my first month on clomid and ovulated today. My advice to anyone would be to just trust your instincts and if you need to lie then do it. All your asking for is one blood test so why wait any longer? If I'd waited the 12months like certain surgeries want then I'd only just be going to start my infertility journey now.

When I saw the gynaecology consultant the first time even he added time onto my notes. He wrote in my notes I'd been trying two years! When I tried to correct him he exact words were, 'Do you want treatment or not?'. He later explained that if he wrote 2yrs then it would mean that I'd be allowed IVF sooner if it came to that!

MarinaCoyle Sun 12-Jul-15 20:57:13

Hey myblue.

You've already got some great advice here. GP may be willing to do some basic bloods to outrule a thyroid problem and check your day 21 progesterone but I wonder if it might be worth seeing them more to talk about how you've been feeling...

In the gentlest way possible, you seem as though you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself. 6 months isn't an excessive amount of time (although I appreciate it probably feels like forever when you're longing so much for another DC) and your age and previous successful pregnancies are positives. You're not a failure. Do you think it's solely trying to conceive that has you feeling this low??

Sorry if I'm totally off the mark. But either way be kind to yourself. And best of luck. thanks

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