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Ever think it'll never happen?

(8 Posts)
sophiabella Mon 02-Feb-15 22:09:51

I had a mc at the end of last year.

My partner and I really want a baby soooo much. It's all I can think about. It didn't work out in January and we were hoping this month would work out because at the end of this month my partner isn't going to be able to do any baby dancing until about July so it was all hanging on this month but now he's had an emergency operation and my fertile window starts in a couple of days so I know we won't be able to do anything this week. I'm so worried about him and all the time he was in surgery I felt really guilty for thinking that this now means we're out for this month too. I'm going to have to put it to the back of my mind and concentrate on making sure he's OK and then we try again at the end of the summer.

I just wondered if anyone else feels like this? I feel so guilty for worrying about it whilst he's ill! It just consumes me this desire for a baby with him. xx

CookieDough9 Mon 02-Feb-15 22:49:55

I know exactly how you're feeling. We were ttc for 4 years before DD came along, she is 2 now and the best thing to ever happen to us.
It was so heart wrenching going through it, facing disappointment month after month. We are now ttc #2 and I tbh I feel rather anxious about it.
Circumstances are sometimes out of our control but don't feel guilty for the way you are feeling as this is clearly important to you and a desire for a child can and does take over your life. Be kind to yourself. wishing you and your partner well flowers

CookieDough9 Mon 02-Feb-15 22:50:32

Ps hope your partner is doing ok after surgery and recovers well

sophiabella Tue 03-Feb-15 07:22:25

Thank you that is really kind of you. I can't imagine going through the ups and downs of this for 4 years, how did you cope? How long have you been TTC #2? I hope it goes well for you xx I'm up early about to set off to hospital to find out how he's doing. Hoping he is recovering well I miss him n he's only been away from our home for the one night !

SunshinePickle Tue 03-Feb-15 07:38:02

I know exactly how you feel. Since my DH had emergency surgery in the summer any baby making activities have been few and far between. I feel like the worlds biggest bitch for getting upset as each month passes because we've wasted another opportunity, surely I should just be feeling bad that DH still has pain?

Hope your DPs operation goes well & isn't too major. Who knows, next month you could be lucky?!

CookieDough9 Tue 03-Feb-15 14:04:39

I was referred to the fertility clinic and after investigations it was discovered that I had severe endometriosis. My tubes were said to be stuck and I also had an 8cm cyst on one ovary. All this was removed and lasered, after which I was put on zoladex for 6 months to stop my periods to give my body a break as I was at risk of the endo returning. We were then referred for IVF but conceived naturally after the initial appointment with the consultant.
I think in a way I felt hope that at least I was being investigated and it kept us going. We just found ways to cope; going out enjoying ourselves, holidays, nights in together.
This is the first cycle of ttc #2.
Sorry to waffle on but what I am trying to say is you will find a way to deal with this and all your feelings are valid so try not to feel guilty. It may be that your bfp arrives much sooner than you think. Fx for you

sophiabella Tue 03-Feb-15 16:14:58

Oh that sounds like such a long wait but pleased you got answers and knew why. I'm sending you lots of luck for this time xx

sophiabella Tue 03-Feb-15 18:54:15

I'm really hoping my partner recovers quickly!! He's back home today and says he still wants to try for this month... he has a few days to recover and then it's day 14 in my cycle so we're cutting it fine!!

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