Starting trying - very late tho

[something2say]

Hello ladies! How very exciting to be posting in this section!!

My lovely partner of 3 years - his friends are expecting their first and now he is broody and wants one of his own. He has been a touring musician for years, now touring less, and I think he feels a bit left behind, and anyway he has suggested we have our own baby!

After giving the matter some thought, I have agreed and we are set to start.

I am after advice. I am 40 which is not great obviously, but I do ovulate and have regular periods. No health problems, not overweight, quite fit and well. I have just now bought a months worth of nutrients for those trying to conceive.

I see terms on here tho that I don't understand, especially around when to have sex. I ovulate around day 14 / 15 (28 / 29 day cycle, been stable for years). How often should we have sex and when, would you say, O I can introduce this sexiness on demand into our lives?

How very exciting! Have been thinking about whether I'd like a little boy or a little girl and I honestly don't mind.

Thanks in advance for any tips. Watching him touch his friend's partner's bump was so sweet.

[Nomio230]

Hi there, welcome to the TTC club!

I think the general advice is to start dtd (doing the deed) about a week before you ovulate right up until the big day. The idea behind this is that sperm can live for several days in the body, so there will be some hanging around ready for when the egg drops.

Good luck!

[janey1234]

Hey
Also 40, and started late - although at 38 so now have one DS. Just started trying for number 2, and unfortunately had a mmc in November. Body finally back to normal so back to trying this month.
The regular periods thing is, IMO, a real help and a sign of things working well. Hopefully you'll have no problems conceiving.
I used a clearblue ov kit, and so DTD for a couple of days before getting the ov smiley, and for a couple after. Worked twice so I reckon that's about right. Good luck!

[something2say]

Hello! Thanks so much for the answers. Nomio, I had heard that too - is it true that a sperm that waited for the egg may lead to a little girl, whereas a sperm that hits sooner gets a little boy? Or is that an old wives tale?

I have texted my partner to say when we have to start having sex.. !! How exciting!!

Janey I am sorry to hear of your mmc. I hope you are feeling better. Can you tell me about the Clearblue Ov tests - would you recommend?

Meanwhile, we will have some sex....

He's got cream carpets. Should I start laughing now? I have made him aware of the poonami phenomenon, from reading mn....

[allchatnicknamesgone]

Hi, Really hope it happens quickly for you, but my biggest tip is to not tell him when the 'right' time of the month is. Willingness and eagerness to have a baby with you can actually do silly things to a mans mind and penis in turn! Hopefully it will never be a problem, but it was a bolt out of the blue for me when for the first time ever my DH struggled to get it up and then added more pressure as the months drew on. But ttc is a really exciting stage…just be prepared that it can also be quite a emotional rollercoster.
Good luck to you and your partner x

[dorasee]

I have three kids... my two youngest came later as a result of a second marriage: DC2 at age 38...DC3 at age 42. I didn't use any charting methods until I reached 40 and we wanted to try once more after suffering a late miscarriage when I was 39. My periods were a mess for ages while my body recovered from its pregnant state and it took about a year to recover mentally and to even think about trying again. We didn't really try at all until I was 41. My periods were totally normal and regular but I needed to make sure I was ovulating regularly. I used Clear Blue's digital ovulation kit and I swear by it. I was pregnant within the month of using it. I didn't do anything else other than use the clear blue kit. We feel so incredibly blessed that our little baby boy made his marvellous appearance. It does happen more easily that you think. I so agree with what allchat said... do not get him involved in baby making... don't talk ovulation or anything. That is a KILLER between the sheets. Know when you're ovulating and enjoy the rest! Best of luck to you OP!

[something2say]

Aww many thanks ladies, I will follow your advice.

He was the one to bring this whole idea up yet last night he seemed a bit shy to speak of the vitamins I have bought, so I will take your advice and just get back to normal, with a little glint in my eye for two weeks when we need to start DTD.

Thanks for your stories.

[JessieMcJessie]

There's a thread on here for those ttc a first baby at 40 or older, mostly we didn't meet the right person till later in life. Don't know hiw to link but we were in page 1 earlier today-I am the OP. Come and join us!

Oh and timing wise they say every other day for the 5 days up to ovulation, on day of ovulation and the day after for good luck. Trouble with not telling your DP is that if he is not used to sex that frequently he'll soon cotton on.Good luck!

[something2say]

Hello!!! Thanks so much - I will look for that thread. Right now I am still trying to get my own head around it. You know when you think that's it for you, and its not too bad an option, and then having a baby is back on the cards? That's me right now.

Will come and join in tho, thanks.

[BubGal13]

something- you sound so genuinely excited its so sweet, wishing you all the best.

The month we conceived we switched to doing every other day starting around 4 days being ovulation and carrying on for about a week, some say that can be better than every day...also we used Conceive plus- so give that a go!

www.amazon.co.uk/Conceive-Plus-Fertility-Lubricant-Tube/dp/B002V0ZJ4Y?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21