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Trying to Conceive Baby No. 2

(14 Posts)
TTTCBaby2 Mon 01-Dec-14 16:22:07

Hello Ladies,

I thought I would post on here and see if anyone is in a similar situation because I am becoming a little worried.
I'll explain a little I am 31 years old and I have a 2 1/2 year old son, I have been off the pill since January 2014 because we want to try and conceive our 2nd child. So far we haven't had any luck, I would say we have only been actively trying since July and anything before that was just if it happens it happens. So each month I think surely this is the month and each month it ends it disappointment. Obviously I googled and I keep seeing this secondary infertility and now I am worrying about that too! It took a year and 2 months to conceive my son so maybe I am being impatient?
We are a healthy couple and still young so I can't understand why its taking so long? Should I see someone or is it still too early? It doesn't help that all my friends seem to get pregnant so quickly.
How long did it take you to get pregnant with your second child? Was it longer than the first?? Also does anyone have any thoughts on reflexology to help?? I have been having that for 2 months so far.
Any stories are really welcome my partner doesn't really know what to say to me.

Thank you smile

Spanielpuppy Mon 01-Dec-14 21:46:46

Hello TTCbaby2, unfortunately there isn't a lot most nhs pct will do for secondary infertility (it's a postcode lottery) if your in a lucky area they will still recommend ttc for at least 3 yrs.
as the statistics are 80% of women conceive in the first yr 93% in second yr and 97% in third year.

So my advice would be, keep going keep an eye on ovulation symptoms maybe use opks. Keep positive, enjoy Christmas period. Then in the new year make sure your both taking supplements, have a good balanced diet and active lifestyle. Ginger can help boost fertility. You could also try reflexology or complementary therapies?

Good luck stay positive

CoffeeTwo Mon 01-Dec-14 22:19:43

Hello, person who is me.

I'm 31. DS is 2.9. We have been actively trying since July!

Also feeling glum and starting to worry that my EMCS might have caused some damage...

TTTCBaby2 Tue 02-Dec-14 09:50:54

Hi Both,

Thank you for your responses hopefully if the statistics are right this will be our year!!
I've just bought an OPK so I am hoping that will help but I am trying not to stress to much because obviously that makes it worse! I didn't know that about ginger I will try that too. I am currently in my 3rd cycle of reflexology which is amazing but hasn't performed any miracles yet.

CoffeeTwo I worry my birth has caused complications too it was a natural birth but forceps delivery and a major tare involving a lot of stitches.
Have you tried anything new to help you along??

CoffeeTwo Tue 02-Dec-14 10:29:01

I'm using an OPK this month for the first time and we're also using preseed as I don't get much ewcm. I worry that being 3 years older since I last got pregnant might make a difference but really the odds are still in our favour at our age.

GingerbreadHead Tue 02-Dec-14 10:41:44

Hi OP, my DD, who is now 3, took 2 months to conceive. It has taken me nearly 18 months to conceive a second, got my BFP last month, we had several tests done that all came back normal, so there doesn't seem to be any reason as to why it took so long the second time around! It is just one of those annoying, frustrating things. I did take a very low dose of Soya Isoflavones the month that I finally conceived, there is a thread on here if you want to find out any more info, so whether it was them or just my time I don't know!
It will happen for you, just keep on trying, and keep enjoying it! I agree, try not to worry about it over Christmas and enjoy it with your DS, and stop googling Secondary Infertility, I got myself into a right state over it and it only made me worry and stress all the more, which probably didn't help!

TwoLittleTerrors Tue 02-Dec-14 10:52:08

Hi just keep your hopes up and that's it really. I don't think age has that much to do with it in your case. So stop worrying. On average fertility doesn't decline till 35 and that those who manage to be pregnant before 35 still doesn't decline much. (So say a guardian article I read. The advise to start before 35 is that if you have fertility problems it will take a while to get diagnoses and treatments and so being older is a risk. And also IVF works better with younger women).

Like you say it took you over a year first time.

My first was conceived first or second cycle when I was 35. Second took over 1.5 years with 2 miscarriages but I was 39! At this age I can definitely blame the miscarriages to age.

TwoLittleTerrors Tue 02-Dec-14 10:53:55

But I am now cuddling DD2 in a cafe drinking a latte. There is definitely hope out there.

TTTCBaby2 Tue 02-Dec-14 11:44:53

Yes CoffeeTwo age is definitely in our favour it is disheartening. I remember the same feeling when I was waiting to conceive my DS I didn't think I was be as bad second time round but I definitely am! Let me know how you get on with the OPK which one did you get?
Thanks GingerbreadHead that really helps, I will stop googling it makes me far more stressed than is clearly necessary!
Thanks TwoLittleTerrors that is also good to know, maybe the second babies just take a little longer? I think I may be far to impatient though!

CoffeeTwo Tue 02-Dec-14 18:09:32

I'll be using the clear blue digital tests. I think there's the added anxiety when ttc subsequent children about what age gap you'll end up with and how a pregnancy and baby will affect your little one.

Of course I know how lucky I am to have one healthy child already. I guess I didn't expect the desire to be so strong for one more.

Good luck for this month, I'm over on the December bus if you fancy joining smile

TTTCBaby2 Tue 02-Dec-14 19:30:34

That's the one I'm using, well I'll start on Sunday and see what happens.

Same as me but I'd love for my son to have a little brother or sister he would be so cute! I didn't think the desire would be as strong this time but it is exactly the same. Fingers crossed all round!

Good luck to you too I'll have to get on the December bus too smile

estelle6993 Fri 12-Dec-14 19:20:29

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

dildoos Sun 14-Dec-14 07:07:33

Hey op and all
I have been TTC baby 2 for 43 cycles.
We self referred in the end to dr shehata in London!
My body he described as basically having an allergic reaction to being pregnant? So having immune system lowered to conceive smile
What I am trying to say is don't give up but don't leave too long in case something so simple could prevent monthly bfn heart ache!

Good luck x

TTTCBaby2 Mon 15-Dec-14 11:48:02

Thanks Dildoos and good luck to you also. smile

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