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TTC with sexual dysfunction - frustration anyone??

(4 Posts)
Nonconformist34 Fri 14-Mar-14 14:03:21

Hi everyone, just thought I would start a thread here with this topic as I feel I don't really fit into any of the buses of ttc.

Just wondered if there was any others out there having to deal with the pressure of sexual performance such as impotency, premature or delayed ejaculation which obviously is a technical problem on top of having to deal with the whole ttc business????

Also, would love any success stories and top tips on how to deal with this to give us all hope.

It's not a topic I've seen discussed here much so feel like I'm the only one. My stats are ttc #1 cycle 10, DH has PE.

CakesALot Fri 14-Mar-14 16:08:14

Hi! I haven't seen anything on these threads about sexual dysfunction either - its a tricky subject to bring up but thank you for doing so smile

I am also ttc #1. DH is on long term medication which can affect his 'performance', ejaculation failure being the problem. It probably affects us about 25% of the time, although it comes and goes in phases (this month being a bad phase!) It is something that affected us starting to ttc for a long time but in the end we figured we should just give it a go. I find i need to let DH take the lead on when it happens, and to keep it natural and not put any pressure on him. Even then it's not a guarantee, but it helps.

I can share some success though as we did get pregnant in cycle 2 in January this year. Sadly, I went on to miscarry in February. But it does go to show you just need that one swimmer to get through and it can happen. But I completely understand the frustrations of not knowing if/when you'll get those swimmers, despite how often you DTD!

Nonconformist34 Fri 14-Mar-14 17:37:17

Thanks for your reply cakes, so sorry about your miscarriage this year. It does give all us hope that it can happen, even with a history of dysfunction.

I think ttc is hard enough without the added pressure of not being able to perform when required. My DH's delayed ejaculation (DE), has never been a problem in the past, obviously has been a great contraception so far!!!In the days running up to my ovulation time, it's not too much of a problem but sustaining dtd consistently over a week becomes tricky. Like you, we have better months than others. I just find it frustrating that after 10 months ttc, we may gave only had 3/4 months where we were 'bang on' with the accurate timing.

How long have you been ttc? We're on cycle 10, if no success by next month we're both going to our GP where we'll be having initial fertility tests done. We've not discussed the DE yet with the GP as it's obviously embarrassing but hoping they'll take us seriously enough to refer us to a fertility clinic.

CakesALot Fri 14-Mar-14 19:14:13

We've only been ttc since November but it's been a dramatic few months! DH has been on his meds 18 months and he never had any trouble before that-ironically we only started thinking about ttc soon after he started them before we'd realised the problem was going to be a regular thing! He was only meant to be on them 6 months so we put it off. But 6 months became a year so we thought we might as well get going! DHs condition isn't going away so we'll have to put up with the side effects of his meds.

We're just trying to take each month as it comes at the moment. I hope the docs listen to you and give you some support. It's so tricky because it's not a fertility issue as such. I'd be really interested to hear what they tell you

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