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I will not TTC before...

(18 Posts)
DewClawDisaster Mon 03-Feb-14 21:17:07

(First thing on the list being that we're sure we want to have a 3rd DC but if we did go for it!):

1) The building work on the house is complete or at least the end is in sight.
2) I have gained a permanent contract at work so definitely have something to return to post ML.
3) I have regained a level of fitness so that I feel healthy going into pg like I did first time round. I'm planning to complete C25K and join our local Parkrun.
4) I have sorted the piles caused by the other pregnancies/deliveries blush (sorry for tmi, but this is a big one for me!)

Anyone else waiting to TTC with things in the way first?

Squeakybeaky Tue 04-Feb-14 10:43:12

I think there are always things in the way if you really think about it! We have been putting off a third DC for a couple of years now but are now going for it. Partly because there is no point putting it off anymore and we do want a third and partly because the government is cutting child benefit and tax credits for more than 2 children and this will probably come in May 2015. If you have more than 2 before that date they will pay it though. I know if shouldn't be financial but every little helps right?

MichaelFinnigan Tue 04-Feb-14 10:57:03

Don't bother sorting the piles, they'll be back [bitter voice of experience]

CherryPie3 Tue 04-Feb-14 11:03:56

Sounds a pretty reasonable list smile

My list:
I will not ttc #4 until:

1) I have lost some weight.

2) I have lost enough weight.

3) l have a healthy BMI (currently 43!!! blush)

grin

DewClawDisaster Tue 04-Feb-14 23:00:09

Oh no Michael! Is there no hope? sad

lollydollydrop Wed 05-Feb-14 11:46:45

I am waiting to TTC number 1, on my list:

1) Buy a house with DP (been house hunting one month, have mortgage in principle)

2) Finish PhD(?)

3) Get married(? May not have money for this after we buy house)

Currently I'm 29 and will only finish PhD when we are both 32. I don't know definately whether I will wait till its over or start trying 1/2 or 2/3 of the way through..

prettywhiteguitar Wed 05-Feb-14 18:17:42

Move into accommodation for dp's new job, this is sept !!

Although secretly pleased I have convinced him to try for #3 as he was pretty against it.

Get married ? Although I really cba with all the hassle if organising it !

tinywife Wed 05-Feb-14 18:33:26

We are waiting for our extension to be finished (building starts in March!!), and then for our finances to recover a bit - expecting it to be costly, especially with the kitchen and bathroom I have my eye on!!

Also, I was given a promotion at work last week so want to do a year in my new role before we start ttc.

So it looks like January 2015 for us!

DewClawDisaster Wed 05-Feb-14 23:16:33

Finances are always going to come into the equation Squeaky!

Good luck CherryPie - how old are the other 3?

PrettyWhite we're still having that discussion, bet it feels good to know you will ttc, even if it's a way off.

Tiny Jan 15 is a good goal, a nice 12 month plan!

Lolly I guess once you've got a home, the other stuff will be clearer?

lollydollydrop Fri 07-Feb-14 01:03:04

Tinywife will it be your first?

DewClaw, I think probably once I'm into this phd I will realise what a ridiculous idea ttc is!! ;)

tinywife Fri 07-Feb-14 08:46:52

Yes it will be our first! We're both 29 and got married last year so it seems like the right time to start thinking about these things smile Hubby is much more laid back and is happy to start trying whenever, and although I realise that there will never be a perfect time I want to feel as though I have things in order as much as possible. Knowing that a bigger house and job security are in the near future makes me think we should wait a while.

That and I'm pretty scared about our life changing forever!!

lollydollydrop Fri 07-Feb-14 10:53:52

Tiny we are soon 29 so getting on a bit too ;) My oh is very laid back also and would happily be trying now/ already have one by now if it was up to him. I tend to be more practical/realistic about these things. Plus its the woman's life and body that changes the most so we have to be sure! And get prepared mentally, physically, emotionally, financially... smile

Lucky for you that you are already married (my oh sees it as too expensive at this time in our life) and see even more stability on the horizon!! smile smile Are you on the 'waiting to ttc' thread?

I know exactly what you mean about being scared, I am too so I think instead of active trying, tracking ov etc we will try the 'just shagging' approach. We have started using withdrawal method instead of barrier protection so we seem to be making baby steps! (Excuse the pun!)

tinywife Fri 07-Feb-14 23:48:32

Oh no I haven't seen the 'waiting to ttc' thread, I'll have a look for it smile

It took us three years to recover from buying the house until we could afford to get married - we had quite an intimate wedding but it still cost a fair bit! That said you can do it for not very much if you are that way inclined - there is still a part of me that wishes we had eloped!! It is lovely being married though - a nice fuzzy sort of feeling smile

My hubby works abroad for a lot of the year, so although I like the idea of being laid back about ttc I can't see it happening for us. I am quite the planner though (I work as a project manager) so it will probably help me to feel in control of things.. we'll have to see if I feel the same next year lol! It also means I will be parenting on my own for a lot of the time so I really need to feel prepared emotionally - I've never been a 'baby' person so I'm not sure how naturally it will all come to me!

I think I need this year to really get my head around the idea grin

Tranquilitybaby Sat 08-Feb-14 01:08:18

Before our Florida holiday in July because I want to be able to fully enjoy it, go on all the rides and sunbathe in the gear etc but it's oh so tempting to try now!!

Tranquilitybaby Sat 08-Feb-14 01:08:32

*heat even

lollydollydrop Sat 08-Feb-14 13:40:29

Tiny I have looked at eloping but I think I would be forever sad that my family weren't there- e.g. my 5.5 year old niece has been saying for a few years now about being our flower girl, and it would probably break my dads heart if he didnt get to walk me down the aisle! I also know exactly where I want to get wed and it is pretty pricey IMO. I want to get married in Summer so that doesnt help as its peak season but really want an outdoor wedding and the venue is perfect for that.

Did you get married on a weekend or weekday? You can save a bit by going mid week, but I would just be worried people wouldnt come, as really dont they need to book off 2 days (the wedding day and day after?).

What part of the country are you in? I am a planner too! Although I think I am probably the opposite to you- i am more of a 'baby' person, and less of a 'child' or 'teenager' person! ;) Maybe we could swap LOL

lollydollydrop Sat 08-Feb-14 13:41:30

Tranquility you may even find that you conceive on hols if you have a nice relaxing stress free time with lots of shagging! grin

tinywife Sat 08-Feb-14 15:51:00

We got married on the Saturday of a Bank Holiday just to ensure all our guests could make it! We chose an outdoor venue as well - it was just stunning (I'll pm you the link to the venue if you like?) but bloody freezing - typically it was like the coldest spring on record (might be a slight exaggeration but it felt like it!).

Really the biggest expense is the venue and the registrar - all the rest you can be flexible with - cater for yourself, guests can bring drinks instead of gifts, so many bits you can diy! I absolutely adored offbeatbride.com/ for inspiration on how to do it yourself and still having a beautiful, unique day.

I think once you have bought your house (which is a much bigger challenge imo) just set a date - you'll have something to aim for and I tend to find when you really want something you find a way to make it happen smile

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