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dsis pregnant

3 replies

TheMeaningOfLifeIs42 · 08/10/2013 23:57

Ok so my DH and I have been ttc 12months+ and I have got to the point where Im envious of all pregnant people and people with children.(seems to be everyone else but me).We havnt told anyone we are ttc. And when friends etc say they are pregnant I smile to their face and then come home and cry wondering why they have been chosen and not me. However my sister has just announced shes pregnant first month trying. So the point of all this is how can I make myself genuinely happy for her and not feel envious . Thanks for reading my rant

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CountryCob · 09/10/2013 06:58

I had this about a year in, did go away for me, reminded myself that them having a baby took nothing away from me and that was their baby not the baby I wanted with my husband, it isn't as if there is an allocation they are using up! three of my friends had babies this summer and have been happy for them that way, having a niece or nephew is great and you get to be their auntie who they will love, I have thought that even if we never conceive it is great that there is a baby to watch grow and be close with, you are gaining that and when you get your first kiss or cuddle off them you will see that, being an auntie is great so congratulations xxxx

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GladitsnotJustMe · 09/10/2013 10:37

I sympathise with you feeling envious, I think that's inevitable and I would just be honest with her if I were you.

But to answer your question "how can I make myself genuinely happy for her" - I have 2 DNs. I love them so much it hurts. You can support your Sister and hopefully learn lots from her experience of pregnancy which will hopefully help you in the future. You can learn lots about caring for your DN when it arrives. You get to be the cool auntie and teach it all the naughty stuff that you might not want to teach your own DCs (e.g. funny rhymes about bogies and farts... ) You DN will love you to bits. I feel like a superstar when my DNs get all excited about the prospect of me coming for tea.

Having a child in the family lifts everyone. That child will share some of your genes, you might even see some of yourself in its looks or personality. That's a weird feeling, and quite special.

I too am TTC with complications, so I do long to be a mother myself. But being an Aunty is wonderful in its own right.
xx

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MortifiedAdams · 09/10/2013 10:43

Honestly? By looking at this logically. Whether or not she falls pregnant has no bearing on your fertility. Babies arent handed out on a ration basis - noone has taken 'your share'.

It must be heartbreaking to want something so bad and see others getting it, but try and find some comfort in the fact that your sister has been incredibly lucky to fall.pregnant.

Friends of mine are finally pg after two years ttc. How they must have felt watching everyone around them have babies, ill.never know, but now it has happened for them, we are all walking on cloud nine.

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