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Help me be happy for my friends

(6 Posts)
justhayley Thu 18-Jul-13 01:00:58

So I'm TTC #2 and have various obstacles in the way which means it could take a life time. My 2 closest friends are currently pregnant and tomorrow my 3rd is coming over to mine so I can hold her hand while she POAS! I'm surrounded by it. My friends taken 2 tests 1 BFN one BFP not sure why she wants to do the 3rd test with me instead of her husband but like a good friend I agreed and she'l be knocking on my door first thing in the morning test in hand. She's got all the signs so its more than likely she's pregnant.
She's not aware how much I want to be but is aware we are trying.
Please help me to be genuinely happy for her and not have any jealously thoughts.

internationallove985 Thu 18-Jul-13 01:11:25

Aww. You can't feel something that you're not (happy for your friends) Another baby is the one thing you want more than anything else in the world it seems like everyone else has it. Do your friends know you're ttc because asking you to hold her hand while she P.O.A.S seems do I dare say a bit insensitive to me. While it's never ideal it's okay and understandable to feel jealous you know. It's hardly the crime of the century.
I am sending you lots of baby dust. xxx

ZingWidge Thu 18-Jul-13 01:51:35

"TTC#2" what does that mean?

are you trying for 2nd baby or is it your 2nd cycle?

justhayley Thu 18-Jul-13 11:17:41

Thanks international. She came round and got her BFP. I was actually really excited at least someone in my bathroom gets a positive hey lol.
Slight jealousy but a lot leas than I expected smile

#2 meaning my 2nd baby. Been trying for 10 months but with irregular periods I'm only on cycle 5 hmm

moggle Thu 18-Jul-13 11:39:25

I tell myself that I don't want THEIR babies, I want OUR baby. There's not a finite source of babies; someone else getting pregnant is not going to affect my chances.
If I'm feeling particularly blue about it I'll think to myself, ooh she'll hate being pregnant in this weather... or, ooh due just before Christmas, that's going to be inconvenient... or scour FB photos to see if she's put on a lot of weight, or feel a bit smug when I find out they're struggling with a difficult newborn :-( Awful of me! And really I couldn't give a toss about any of this stuff and would be glad for any or all of those things to happen to me if I could just get the BFP.
If it is one of my closest friends I usually am genuinely happy for them - I just get a short moment of sadness when I find out and think, when will it be my turn to share this news. It's the acquaintances - people you collect on FB - where the sheer numbers of pg announcements can get a bit galling. I now assume everyone is about to announce a pregnancy whenever I see a friend or receive a phone call, that way it's easier to brace yourself!

Good for you on letting your friend POAS in your house, that's so good of you. Really hope you get your BFP soon xx

juneau Thu 18-Jul-13 11:41:27

Have you had that irregular cycle checked out OP?

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