Hi Rosduk, I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your son. Please do come and join us on the Rainbow Babies thread - I'm sorry I can't link to it as I'm on my phone, but have a quick scroll down through Conception and you'll find it! Everyone on there has experienced a loss either during pregnancy or after birth, and we are all either ttc, pregnant again or already holding a subsequent baby. My own longed-for daughter died at the age of two days last June, after she was brain damaged during the induction of labour at 42 weeks. Since then I've had an early m/c, and I'm currently having IVF and hoping so much to conceive again soon.
I can promise you that everyone on the rainbow thread will understand every single complicated emotion you're having! Hope to see you there x
I'm so sorry about your loss, but as kleinepoppet has said above the rainbow babies thread here is full of women who have been through this terrible journey and are still battling with the grief but we all desperatly want another child.
My daughter was stillborn at 36 weeks due to a knot in her cord, that was nearly two years ago and since I have had two miscarriages and currently I am 9 weeks pg. If it wasn't for the wonderful ladies on the thread I don't think I would be able to function sometimes. I'm finding it difficult being pg but then again I found it difficult to ttc as well.