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Fantastic Forty Plus, part 9, this time is our time,bring on the bfp's!

(993 Posts)
hopefulgum Tue 01-Jan-13 23:20:41

We've filled out thread - I do hope you all find your way here. I can't add a message on the old thread to let you know it is

This new thread, will no doubt have its own set of bfp's and babies. I am excited to see what it brings.

DoctorWhoFan Tue 05-Mar-13 12:25:30

Going over to Gum's new thread...

sparklysapphire Tue 05-Mar-13 10:07:17

Irish, I'm very sorry about your godfather, sounds like a real shock. I'm sure you'll do a great job supporting your mum. I really hope things pick up for you soon, you've had a tough time over the past few months.

Green, gum & drwho, I hope this cycle brings you all your BFPs!

Calibee, as your DP is home all week next week, does that mean he'll have finished his 12 weeks basic training and things will get a bit easier? I hope so. Yes, DH had agreed to TTC so knew full well we weren't using contraception, but it seems like he thought that I'd be happy we were trying, and that it wouldn't happen so at least he could say he gave it a go.

Gum, a lottery win would be great, wouldn't it? I too could live without being a working mum, but I think I probably do need to work really. It'd just be better if I could have a nice job that I could walk to, so not reliant on our hopeless trains, which of course pays me what I get now! I hope you feel better after a good night's sleep! Thank you for your kind words as ever. I'm going to go back and see the doctor I saw originally next week as she suggested I see her again after a month, so I'll see what she says. I'm also going for coffee with my clinical psychologist friend this morning, so I'm hoping she may have some professional expertise to offer.

Notsoold, how are you doing? And remnant, what about you?

Diege, I hope you're not feeling too rough.

Hi to JBrd, isabeller, stephenie, morien, mazzie, romann, calendargal and apologies if I've missed anyone.

JBrd Tue 05-Mar-13 10:04:22

Morning, ladies! Quick visit, before I go back downstairs where my mum is on granny duty and entertaining DS grin

sparkly I can only agree with what the other ladies have said. Please look after yourself, this must all be so stressful. Glad that your DB is supportive, what about the rest of the family? Could you escape for a visit?

hopeful, green and drwho - sorry about your AFs, give yourselves a treat! Chocolate, cake... You deserve it.

Cali Sounds like you had a nice weekend, and I bet you're looking forward to having your DP for a whole week! Being in a long-distance/weekend relationship really does make you appreciate the time you get together so much more. Have you got your London trip sorted? I love that city, still miss it sometimes, even though I moved away 7 years ago.

Irish So sorry to hear about your uncle, how sad. I hope your trip goes fine and that you and your get a chance to say your good-byes.

And yes, I believe we are cycle buddies! CD17 here today, and I think I ovulated on Saturday or Sunday. Both the Cbfm and FertilityFriend are a bit meh, to be honest - the monitor is only giving me Highs, no Peaks as yet. And FF seems reluctant to pinpoint OV day this time, in spite of a very nice and consistent temp rise! I think the botched-up temp reading on Thursday has thrown it off course... I'm pretty certain I ovulated, all the other signs point to it, OPK and EWCM etc. We dtd before, on and after my suspected ov day - I am exhausted (and so is DH, although he'll never say).

So I am now officially in the 2ww! Feel free to cheer, green grin

hopefulgum Tue 05-Mar-13 09:53:40

Here is part 10

hopefulgum Tue 05-Mar-13 09:48:22

Well, looks like we are all cycle buddies, drwhofan and greenlizard. Let's all get bfp's this month eh?

Not only do I have AF, I seem to have gather a cluster of cold sores under my lip. The itch is driving me nuts! And I have a sore throat and I'm tired. And my DH is going away tomorrow morning for two nights. Argh!!

Sorry about the rant...blush

Irish, I am sorry to hear about your Godfather. You have been through so much bereavement. I hope the funeral isn't too hard on you and your mum. ((hugs))

I suppose I had better remember to turn the CBFM on tomorrow morning. It was the last thing on my mind this morning, what with sheets to wash, DS to shower, and trying to get out of the door on time.

I am so over this working mama thing. Wish I could win the lottery and be a stay at home mammy, with the whole day to get the chores done so that I didn't have to come home and think about folding laundry and ironing...Sorry..ranting again.sad

Bloody hell, I am a downer today. I promise to try harder to be up and jolly tomorrow grin

greenlizard Tue 05-Mar-13 08:44:38

Morning. Well it appeared that my jogging and DTD (for the fun of it!!) have got things moving.....CD1 for me too!! Don't feel too bad about it as I knew it was coming so went in a huff about it at the weekend grin and I am back to this could be THE cycle......

Sorry to hear we are still cycle buddies drwhofan and hopeful...once more into the fray?

irish so sorry about your godfather. Hope your mum is ok and that your well timed DTD does the trick. Circle of life and all that.

notsoold fingers crossed for you and hope you are managing to get through the limbo before your scan.

Where is everyone else in their cycles...any 2ww's I can cheer on from the sidelines while limbering up for the coming month.

DoctorWhoFan Tue 05-Mar-13 07:21:47

Irish so sorry to read of your loss. You're having a rotten time of it lately! I'm sure your love and support will help your mum. ((Hugs))

DoctorWhoFan Tue 05-Mar-13 07:19:41

Morning ladies, period arrived this morning, so now officially on cd1...again! Gah! angry

Irishmammybread Tue 05-Mar-13 00:01:49

Hi everyone.
I've not been posting for a while as we've had yet another bereavement, my uncle,who was also my godfather, died last week very unexpectedly, he'd not been unwell at all, though he was 72. He's the first of my Mum's siblings to die so she's taken it very hard. I'm flying back to Ireland for the funeral in the next few days. I'm going on my own as we thought it would be better not to take the girls out of school and DH has so recently had time off work when his Dad died so I've been trying to make after school childcare arrangements,write lists about the days homework is due back, who has PE when etc and sort out meals in advance. Because I now work part time I tend to sort out everything at home which is fine until I have to go away!I'm sure they'll manage though and I feel it's very important to pay my respects to my godfather who was a really sweet man,and support my Mum.
I've only been skimming the thread ,things move so quickly in a few days!
Welcome to the new people!
gum sorry AF arrived. I can identify with those same shift in emotions during each cycle, sometimes I think it's not going to happen and I should be happy with my life as it is, sometimes I feel resigned to it, but coming up to ovulation time I feel I need to try and it's all systems go and I can't help hoping.....
I think I ovulated yesterday on cd 14 , I had a temperature shift this morning. The last few cycles it was on cd15 or 16 but I got a positive opk on Sat and again on Sun . We dtd on cd13 and 14 so hopefully I'm in with a chance.
JBrd I think we're cycle buddies?
CaliBee glad you had a good weekend, you must be looking forward to having a full week with DP.
Sorry you feel it's not your month green and DrWho.
Sparkly I don't know what to say really, I think gum's advice about counselling for you is a good idea and I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time when you should be enjoying your pregnancy. x
How are you feeling Diege ?
notsoold ,hope your scan goes well, I'll be thinking of you on the day.
Hello to everyone else I've not name checked.

hopefulgum Mon 04-Mar-13 23:04:34

BTW, we are getting close to the end of our thread. There's about 17 messages left. So if you fill up the thread before tonight (my time), could someone get a new thread started? Otherwise I am happy to do it when I get home...

hopefulgum Mon 04-Mar-13 23:02:52

Good Morning ladies.

Calibee, nice to hear that DP made it home for the weekend.

Drwhofan and greenlizard, did your AF turn up? Mine did last night. So I am pleased that I feel things are on track, but sad I didn't have one of those "all signs point to not pregnant, but I am" pregnancies. Just like every single cycle, right about this time, I feel, "well, it is probably time I accepted that it isn't going to happen", and "my life is lovely, things get easier as DS grows up, life moves on". But I know by the time ovulation rolls around I will be desperately shagging for Australia, hoping to catch a golden egg hmm It is so hard to let this go.

Sparkly, what you are going through is just awful. I honestly don't know how you can continue to live with your DH when he flatly refuses to accept your pregnancy. Calling your refusal to terminate a lack of compromise is ludicrous. It seems so weird that he would prefer your baby disappear when he clearly loves your other child. If he refuses to get counseling, which he clearly is, then I cannot see how he will move past this wall. Sparkly, please protect yourself and your baby, seek some counseling - it may help you work out what to do and how to deal with DH. ((hugs))

How is everyone else?

I hope you are getting through the long days leading to your ultrasound, notsoold.

Deige I hope the sickness isn't too bad.

I had better run. DS wet the bed at 4am this morning, then took ages getting back to sleep (with me), so I was up late. Now I need to get ready for the day ahead.

Have a nice one...grin

CaliBee Mon 04-Mar-13 18:02:59

Oh sparkly my heart really goes out to you. Have you thought what you will do should DH choose not to accept the pregnancy atall?? Remind me.....did he know you were trying/not preventing conception?? If so it seems so unreasonable to ask you to terminate. I understand he must be feeling pretty awful just now...but as an adult and your husband and your lo's father it seems to me like he needs a ruddy good shake. Just remember we are here for you.

lizard anddrwho ...sorry its not looking good for either of you this month.

notsoold when is your scan. Just want you to know I am thinking of you.

remnant I hope you're ok.

Waves to all those who I haven't name checked.

sparklysapphire Mon 04-Mar-13 15:48:55

Calibee, I'm glad your DP made it home this weekend, I hope you both enjoyed it.

Gum, sorry your body has been messing you around, I hope it sorts itself out soon.

Drwho, I'm sorry it's not your month this month, hopefully you'll be successful next month, and green as well.

Hi stephanie, welcome.

AFM, DH and I talked at the weekend. He's no nearer accepting the pregnancy and still wants me to terminate. I said I can't, he takes that as I won't and therefore I'm not prepared to compromise hmm. He's still refusing point blank to talk to anyone either professionally or to friends. I just don't know what to do with him. I was hoping to see my brother this weekend but he phoned to say my nephew had a stomach bug and not to come, at which point I burst into tears and so I had to tell him over the phone when I really wanted to break the news in person. DB is very pleased to be getting another niece or a nephew, who'll be born very close to his birthday if all goes well.

I'll keep reading, but I'm not sure if I'll have chance to post before the end of the week, so I hope everyone has a good week.

DoctorWhoFan Mon 04-Mar-13 15:35:49

Hey greenlizard, I'm OK. Temp below coverline this morning, but AF not showed her face just yet, but obviously, there's no kidding myself, I'm out this month, YET again...

I don't mind other people getting pregnant either. My SIL got pregnant with her second while on the pill. She's due in July...I'm envious as all hell, as we keep trying and I just can't seem to get pregnant sad

greenlizard Mon 04-Mar-13 07:35:38

Morning (or afternoon!) hopeful sorry your AF hasn't turned up yet and is messing with your mind! Well actually, I am sorrier that your HPT remains negative but if it isn't this month it might be this coming month so AF just needs to stop dithering and show up so you can move on...

Funnily enough I am in the same boat, I am 14DPO and bang on schedule my temps have dropped this morning to the coverline, I got a low (at last) on my CBFM final stick, a negative HPT, twinging, feel a bit emotionally wobbly but no spotting or AF yet. Even at my most delusional optimistic I can see that I am soooooo out this month. Bugger it! I was showing my my chart to DP this morning and he said he didn't know why but he really thought this month I was pregnant so we are both a bit sad.

However focussing on the positives I have had a textbook cycle this month and it strangely pleases me that my body is working properly in at least that respect...just need it to get to work in another way (c'mon body!). Hoping first run of my new training schedule (stuck up on my fridge door so I can't avoid it) this evening might hurry AF along so a brand spanking shiny new cycle full of opportunity begins. DP has decided having more sex will also help bring my AF along sooner - really I don't know where he gets the energy shock

drwhofan how are you getting on?

Strangely, I don't mind other people getting pregnant and having babies. I am envious of them (and the time on their side!) rather than jealous if that makes sense? What I can't bear is seeing people with their kids who they resent, treat badly and neglect ....I just think that's so cruel, unfair and makes me so angry and sad.

Hope everyone else is getting on ok?

hopefulgum Sun 03-Mar-13 23:25:43

Hi Romann, although it seems unlikely that you are pregnant, stranger things have happened, and it could be a possibility. However, having your iud removed may have affected your cycle? I guess you will just have to testsmile

My body is sending me very mixed signals, which is irritating as it gives me a false sense of hope. Very frustrating. I thought it was all over as I had some spotting yesterday (12 or 13 DPO), but nothing since. The tender breasts have gone, but I have odd "twinges" now and then. My temperature is lower, but not below cover line. I had a distinctive nasty taste in my mouth last night,along with gagging on my toothbrush, but not this morning. And ept test is starkly negative. Of course, I then think, well, perhaps it is a late implanter (12 dpo), that the spotting was due to implantation, and a positive test won't show up for at least 2-5 days post implantation. Then I read that late implantation doesn't bode well for a successful pregnancyhmm

Perhaps AF will turn up today and all this speculation will be put to rest? At least then I can move on and stop feeling stupidly hopeful...sad

Romann Sun 03-Mar-13 20:27:00

Gosh, can't keep up! Also find it quite hard to understand all the acronyms <thick emoticon> so thank you greenlizard for the translations.

I'm wondering, just wondering, if I've managed to get magically pg. I am now cd27, but ovulated on cd12 (I think - temp surge the morning after) and usually have a cycle around 25-6 days. So this is 15 dpo. I had my iud removed cd 18. Surprised that AF not here yet I did a bit of research today and apparently implantation is 6-12 days after fertilisation, so it is actually possible. I really hope not in fact as had mammogram cd21, and don't want to have irradiated my embryo confused. I've had cramps as though AF was on the way for about 4 days now. If still nothing tomorrow morning I will buy a test. Seems very unlikely though - do you think it's possible?? I haven't been bothering to measure temp the last 2 weeks as wasn't at all thinking it would be possible to be pg.

stephanie I think it's really hard not to have baby envy tbh. Important to work out how to deal with it though. I more or less lost a friend over it when ttc ds2. It was only a few months, but I was obsessed and I couldn't bear to talk to one of my friends when I found out she was pg with her dc2. We never really got past that. Not my most glorious moment blush

All the best to everyone.

CaliBee Sun 03-Mar-13 19:24:23

Hello to all..I hope everybody has had a lovely weekend.
Dp safely deposited back on train to the still doesnt get any easier but at least when he comes home next week its for a whole week instead of 2 nights.
I can sympathise with the baby envy thing. I just seem to notice pregnancy more now I think. I'm fortunate not to have any expectant friends.

JBrd Sun 03-Mar-13 16:02:55

gum Your hypothesis of the Cbfm only giving Highs instead of Peak/Ovulation because of measuring in the morning makes sense - I had thought the same thing. For my cheapie OPKs, they say not to poas first thing in the morning, as the LH is being synthesised during the day, so I was a bit hmm when I read the instructions for the cbfm, where they specifically state that you must use the first morning pee. That way, you're bound to miss the peak, aren't you? Has anyone every tried to use the Cbfm in the evening, against the instructions? I'm curious what that would do to the readings...
Mind you, even with the OPKs it's a bit of a hit & miss for me - I got a faint line on Friday night, then a stronger one (but still not as strong or stronger than the control line) on Saturday late morning, and then only a whisper of a line Saturday evening confused. Thankfully, my temps are quite clearly on the way up, so I guess it's all happening. But I missed my temp taking on Friday morning, argh! DS had been ill Thursday night, and I was sitting up with him, then slept straight through my alarm for temp taking...

stephenie I get baby envy, but I think it is enforced because I had a miscarriage. Since then everyone and the world seems to be pregnant or announcing it. My DH doesn't get it either.
Two of my very close friends are pg with their second, and I had so been looking forward of spending our mat leaves together again (we're NCT buddies). Not going to happen now.
Plus, from now until about August, at least 1-2 babies are due in my circle of friends every month. I'm really hoping that I'll develop a very thick skin very soon. I hate myself a little bit for begrudging them their joy and happiness sad

DoctorWhoFan Sun 03-Mar-13 15:01:28

Afternoon ladies. Another temperature plummet this morning so guessing my period is either coming today or tomorrow, damn it all! Still, I have made a cracking victoria sponge cake, just had a slice, and now as DP is off being busy elsewhere for a few hours, I think I may go for a long lazy bath as consolation. It doesn't come close to consolation, but hey ho...there's always next month. It's what I say every sodding month. But next week I'm determined to overcome my anxiety and go and register with the local doctor and sort out some blood tests. It's a start, long overdue too!

mazzie40 Sun 03-Mar-13 11:42:39

Sorry hopeful I forgot to mention I had no side effects that I know of but I did get a cold at the begining of my cycle then a bad runny nose & a really dry throat & mouth about a week ago, I don't know if thats side effects? X

mazzie40 Sun 03-Mar-13 11:37:37

Thank you hopeful. My very light period started about 5pm on the 31 jan. I started clomid on the 3rd Feb till the 7th. I ov on the 14th. I have no idea about Lp but my period is never before 28 days or after 31 but I've heard clomid can change it?. I have a test here but I'm scared to do it, to be honest I am still thinking af is gonna arrive, I keep going off to the bathroom thinking it's here but it's jst like a watery cm. I will definatley try to test 2mrw morn if af don't arrive. I will let y'all know smile. Have a lovely day ladies & God bless. X

hopefulgum Sat 02-Mar-13 22:44:57

Stephanie - I used to get baby & pregnancy envy really badly. But I've been ttc for so long now that I don't get it nearly as badly. It requires far too much emotional energy. I also have come to realise that many of the women who get pregnant (particular the ones I don't know very well) may have had to go through hell to get where they are,and perhaps one day, I'll be the lucky one with the baby bump and someone else will be envying me.

It is hard to have the thing you most want flaunted in front of you all the time, but just try and think of it as an opportunity for some babydust to rub off on you.

I keep wanting to rub pregnant women's bellies, (though I never would) as in some cultures it is considered helpful when ttc. Apparently it is also good to have close association with a baby. I don't know any little babies at the moment, the youngest one I know is 2.

It will be lovely for you when your sister's baby arrives. Hopefully by then you will have your own baby growing inside

hopefulgum Sat 02-Mar-13 22:39:41

Jbrd, I would definitely trust your opk. I think the CBFM tests estrogen and LH. But because it is reading it in the morning, that may be why you are getting highs but not peaks? I am not an expert, but I am guessing that may be why. Perhaps the peak will come the day after your positive opk?

I did read a study that suggested by the time you get the "peak", the optimum time has passed. which has me thinking I ought to invest in some opk's because I don't have any at the moment. Or I will just do the every second day shagging thing from about day 6?

I am amazed that my DH hasn't noticed a pattern to our shagging. But he is a man I suppose...grin I don't think we've had sex since the last lot of SWI. I have been so tired every night and he hasn't even tried to put a move on me - probably because I'm asleep on the couch every night at 8pm. SO sexy, 'eh???hmm I am going to have to lift my game somehow if we are ever going to conceive this kid. I need an injection of libido...

Right, off to do some research...

hopefulgum Sat 02-Mar-13 22:33:14

mazzie, if you started AF, lightly, rather than spotting, then I'd call that CD 1. I think in the would of assisted conception the flow has to start no later than 2 or 3 pm to be counted as day 1.

So you took the clomid? Did you have any side-effects?

You would be day 31. How long is your Luteal phase (Days post ovulation, when AF starts)? Depending on which day you ovulated, how long your luteal phase is, that will determine when AF is due,and whether you are late. But by now I would definitely test. But I am a serial POAS person hmm

Let us know how you get on.

My temp is still not below cover line. I am 13 DPO. It usually drops around 12 DPO, but although it isn't below cover line, it is certainly not nice and high as you'd expect if pregnant. I am having some familiar cramps, so I reckon AF isn't far away.

I am going to do a bit of research about "the healthy baby code" and will let you know what I find out.

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