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Elderberry Pavlovas Unite - the over 30s TTC number 1 (thread 3)

(997 Posts)
Bunnygirlie Sun 23-Dec-12 23:28:46

Hey ladies, we're over here!

bunnygirlie, 32, TTC since June, AF coming around New Year!
Twinklestar 2, TTC1, cycle 16, BFP was due 19/12
Happylass 34 cycle 4 BFP due Jan 1st
Navis176, 35, TTC #1, cycle 3 (this time around), bfp due around 19 Jan (I think…)
Neshie, 31, TTC #1, on cycle 9, after stopping the pill 18 months ago (took 10 months for AF to return!) BPF due 12th January Fx
MotherOfCleo TTC#1, cycle 3, 5dpo, BFP due New Years Day.
Viviennewestwould, 41, childless hag, TTC one year (mmc in March), on Clomid, ovulating today!
Pipbin 37 cycle 16 BFP due 26/12

Zombies, 32, almost 3 wks pg (by my calculation)- per standard 
measurement from LMP, 6 weeks pg, PCOS. 
MeanMrsMustard 31, 5 weeks pregnant. 
Quod,33, PG
Purplemonster, PG
Janey 38, 12 week scan on Christmas Eve
HazleNutt, due June 21st
Rach, 34, 13+4 pg, due 26th June

Apologies if I've missed you or got something wrong

Aquarius1 Tue 01-Jan-13 13:55:13

Greetings and happy new year one and all smile

Envy you pip and neshie I spent NYE with pg people & talking about pg friends - whilst am happy for them couldn't help feeling sad and frustrated that I couldn't talk about how I was feeling. I keep telling myself 9 months isn't all that long in the scale of things & I just need to be patient....

Boodle9 Tue 01-Jan-13 14:19:48

Happy New Year to everyone! I feel for all of you who had to spend the evening with pregnant people - that would have really dragged me down. Fortunately for us, we don't have any pregnant friends at the moment (just loads who have got new borns) so last night was all about loud music, good cheese and champagne!
MotherofCleo - fingers crossed for you!

happylass Tue 01-Jan-13 15:31:09

Happy New Year everyone. Lets hope it brings lots of BFPs for camp TTC and healthy little ones for those already upduffed grin.

Fx for you Mother sounds very promising!

viviennewestwould Tue 01-Jan-13 15:50:06

Rache, unfortunately 'assistance' does not come cheap and I, for one, feel terribly sad that, without pots of cash (which I don't have), I may not realise my dream of having a baby sad

Rache1S Tue 01-Jan-13 16:14:55

Viv I don't knows too much about it but is it a case of a post code lottery as to how much state assistance is available? One of my work colleague's girlfriend has just had a baby by IVF which has been free on the NHS despite them earning nearly 100k between them, whereas I have heard people from other areas saying they can't get it at all, sometimes because the man already has a child from a previous relationship, which seems very cruel.

Pipbin Tue 01-Jan-13 17:37:04

As far as I know Rache the cut off for IVF is 40. Which is why, if my lap and dye shows that there is no chance of it happening through nature with us then it's straight off to the IVF clinic without stopping.
It's open to anyone regardless of earnings but you need to be under 40 and have a BMI under 30.

viviennewestwould Tue 01-Jan-13 17:38:17

Rache, it frigging infuriates me!! I can't get NHS IVF because I'm over 39 and my DP has a child already with his ex. I do not feel I am entitled to a child, however, I do feel I should not be discriminated against for being 41 when wealthy twenty-somethings are getting NHS help sad angry

twinklestar2 Tue 01-Jan-13 18:22:00

Happy new year everyone.

Nice to see you quod.

Mother - keep us posted, it sounds promising.

Bunnygirlie Tue 01-Jan-13 22:26:46

So onto another year and another month of trying, AF has left the building so now it's FX for DTD with no lurghy, stress or performance anxiety! Think we may go away for the weekend to try and help!

FX for all those trying to get their BFP!

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 07:47:45

the witch landed sad
i am so so sad, gutted, depressed. I was so sure.
I dont see how we can dtd the 4 days prior to ov and twice on ov day and still miss my egg......this is so depressing.
How do people get preggo by accident.....geez!!! sad

Bunnygirlie Wed 02-Jan-13 08:18:28

Oh mother that's pants!

I know what you mean though, my friend when she got pregnant said oh we only did it once that month, geez!!!

HazleNutt Wed 02-Jan-13 09:07:55

mother but you DID get a line, so you probably managed to get the egg, it just didn't implant properly, was a so-called chemical pregnancy. Very common and nothing to worry about - actually can be seen as a good thing, there is an egg and the boys can swim, just have to keep Fx that the next one sticks better.

janey1234 Wed 02-Jan-13 09:52:32

mother I think hazle is right. A line is a line no matter how feint. I think you were pregnant but you had a chemical pregnancy, which is horrible but massively common. So everything 'works' for you and your DP/DH (sorry, can't remember which) and hopefully next time it will implant and stick. And I think I remember correctly that hazle had a chemical pregnancy too, and then got pregnant within a month or two after that. Hopefully the same will happen to you very soon....

HazleNutt Wed 02-Jan-13 10:04:17

Yes that's what happened, I got a line but AF a week or so later, and pregnant again immediately after that (and so far, fx, it seems to be a sticky one) smile . As with a regular mc, some sources claim you're more fertile after a chemical as well, so get busy dtd this month!

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 10:16:30

Thanks Janey and Hazel really nice to hear a positive slant on things. It was such a faint line though, I'm still not sure if I half imagined it.... no pull yourself together woman, you saw a tiny faint line you know you did I just really wanted it this month. Being totally selfish it's my 30th in March and I wanted to be able to announce it then, it would have been THE BEST birthday present ever! Ahh well back to the drawing board bed, sack, BDing, at least the OH will be pleased

happylass Wed 02-Jan-13 11:07:09

So sorry to hear that mother must be awful to have that glimmer of a BFP and then have it snatched away. As the others said at least you know everything is in working order. I turn 35 next month (when the hell did I get so old?!? confused) and was hoping to get a BFP before then. Think I can just about squeeze in 2 more attempts. <holds mother's hand for next cycle>

janey1234 Wed 02-Jan-13 11:18:46

Mother - my line was so faint to begin with that you practically had to examine it under a microscope and I had to keep checking it obsessively under bright lights every ten minutes for about three days. Luckily for me it 'stuck' and the line gradually got darker over a week or two (until I ran out of sticks to pee on). But as all of those who ttc for more than one month know, if there isn't a line there's NOTHING THERE, absolutely sodding NOTHING, so you will have definitely seen a line. Honestly. Sorry it didn't work out this time sad. It's rotten for you both.

Right, mother and happy - I have everything crossed that you both get birthday BFP's, if not sooner. Yes you might not want to announce it on your birthday to everyone, but it would be just as lovely to have had your BFP by then...

Quodlibet Wed 02-Jan-13 11:22:34

Mother sorry to hear that, how disappointing. Echoing what others have said, it sounds like an implantation that didn't stick if you registered some HCG. Nature can be very cruel to us. (As can NHS IVF guidelines Viv - how shitty.)

Pip, going back a bit about whether its worth you ttcing this month with a lap and dye, I have been wondering, don't they flush your tubes with dye during the procedure? I may be being dim but I keep worrying about a poor potentially-fertilised egg getting flushed out. Might it do you good to have a month off from the pressure this month. Sorry to bring a less positive slant to it all.

I am doing OK here, only v light bleeding and occasional mild cramps. I am bracing myself for some hormonal fallout. Tested yesterday and got a positive on a HCG which made me a bit wobbly - those two lines won't ever have the same purely joyful meaning for me again I don't think. I reckon when my body finally works out it isn't pregnant anymore it might (rightfully) be a bit cross. Not sure yet whether we will get back in the saddle this month or wait til after AF as doctors advise. Might be academic anyway as I am away for a week next week without DP so might well miss OV.

Pipbin Wed 02-Jan-13 11:24:47

I want to have the same operation that Lady Mary on Downton had, where the doctor said to her, 'you'll be pregnant in three months', and she was.

viviennewestwould Wed 02-Jan-13 11:49:12

Really sorry, *Mother, how disappointing.

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 12:39:43

thanks everyone, you guys rock! I feel like im on a bit of a roller-coaster, up, down, up down. Thanks Happy <hopes that happy and mother will be skipping into their birthdays - honest we are both only turning 21 - with a bun nestling happily in their ovens and a smug look on their faces>

HazleNutt Wed 02-Jan-13 12:58:01

DH is teasing me because I've turned into such a worrier, very unlike me.

Had the blood tests on Friday and they always send the results the next day. Saturday - nothing. Monday - nothing. Well of course by that time I was convinced that they've discovered something, that I must have a toxo infection, googling the sypmtoms (in most cases, there are none) and so on.
Got the results today, everything fine.

Doc said to relax. How??

MotherOfCleo Wed 02-Jan-13 13:00:32

now I'm confused, what I thought was the start of AF this morning certainly looked like it is now just pale pink CM, not even reached the liner yet. WTF is going on? I have a BFN on my test did one this morning before I realised the witch was in town I do have some cramps so maybe it will turn into more but it usual starts with a vengeance if you know what I mean
Ahhh why is my body such a drama queen?!?

Rache1S Wed 02-Jan-13 16:33:29

Viv I completely agree that access to IVF should be based on individual circumstances and health rather than a flat cut off. Doesn't the NHS know that 40 is the new 30?! I keep telling myself as I hurtle towards it. I also have a DSD which means that I probably wouldn't get help if I needed it, which I also think is ridiculous. As much as I love my DSD, having her around for a few days a week could not possibly satisfy my own fundamental desire to have my own baby with DH and I imagine most other childless step-mums feel the same.

Oooo Mother, I was just about to say commiserations on AF but it sounds like the fat bitch might not be singing after all. Fingers crossed!

Well we arrived home this morning to a letter telling us our Down's risk is 1 in 100,000, which is reassuring and only leaves a thousand other possible problems to worry about.

Aquarius1 Wed 02-Jan-13 17:22:54

mother sounds intriguing - hope its a good sign!!

pip I saw that episode - me too- maybe you could ask while you're having your l&d wink

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