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Fantastic 40+ thread - part 7

(1000 Posts)
lolfactor Thu 28-Jun-12 20:41:44

Shiny new thread - over here everyone smile

somewherebecomingrain Sat 07-Jul-12 08:41:21

hey everyone glad to see you i was wondering where you'd all gone. Sorry you're ill Diege - i get the long-running-argument thing. Can't believe your marking exam papers with a baby - that is heroic. i couldn't. i do work now but i couldn't.

Have you got an almond croissant?

in the dream Tyra Banks is one of 'the girls' (respect to twirly) ie an ovum and the lurking man is the sperm. They're not together in the dream - close but not together! The flower is the thingy - you know, the thingy after egg and sperm meet - and the soil is the uterine wall. For sure. i'm pushing it into the soil cause i'm trying to get it to implant.

gum I am not sure if you are 3dp in real life or the dream! it would be a very on the ball dream if you had a whole cycle mapped out within it! The younger women are potential yous - good luck good luck!

pocket good luck with your consultant. I have to get going on the tests too I realise.

knicky hope your knickers are spotless - rooting for you xxx and yes love the les dawson comment made me smile.

somewherebecomingrain Sat 07-Jul-12 08:41:39

diege couldn't if i had a baby

Diege Sat 07-Jul-12 09:08:42

Hi somewhere wow, your dream is highly symbolic isn't it? Aren't you clever grin
I'll admit exam paper marking with children is a nightmare. I do have a regular job, 4 days a week (uni lecturer) which tbh is a lot easier that being at home blush, but this at home marking (bit of extra £) is a bleeding nightmare and I say every year I won't do it again. But I do...
Dh up now and skulking about the kitchen. I was also pissed off as was met at 6am with a table of plates, spices etc that hadn't been out away, just left. Even more piss off-able being that the table was spottless as I'd tidied before going up to bed angry. Just feeling to rubbish to start off a 'discussion' again.
Are you up to anything nice today somewhere? ps: almod croissant just warming in the oven x

somewherebecomingrain Sat 07-Jul-12 20:29:41

thanks diege yes it was a clever dream grin. DP mess - it's interminable. I hope he does something nice for you very soon indeed. Chez moi we're both freelancers and not either working very hard or earning much money which makes for time-rich cash-poor type stress. Are you more having the cash-rich time-poor stress?

I'm now in Devon on a week's holiday with bickering DP and MIL and we're in the middle of severe weather warnings. TBH love them both but we're stuck inside and it's miserable weather, DS totally bored. It's going to be cool and rainy all week. Woo hoo.

On the way down some depressing anecdotes came up about other people's fertility and I felt really gutted then looked on here and saw your comment and that the almond croissant was there and felt so much better. this is just a good place to come.

I hope I can help others feel better too.


hopefulgum Sun 08-Jul-12 00:16:58

Oh Deige, I'm sorry to hear you are ill, and juggling exam marking and baby - flippin heck- how awful. I can only mark exams if I take myself off to a cafe somewhere and they keep topping up the cuppa. I recently did an online course (only because it will mean I earn a tad more), and found that near impossible with a 3 year old around. I honestly do not know how women go on maternity leave and "study", how on earth do they find time?

Anyway, I do hope you feel better very soon, and I feel your pain where Dh is concerned. Sounds very like my DH. He sleeps in every day because he is a "nightowl" and I am a "morning person". Doesn't mean I wouldn't like a bit of a lie in from time to time, or perhaps a nice cup of tea brought to me in bed....I've basically given up that argument with him.

Somewhere, your holiday with DP and MIL bickering sounds pretty awful too! I hope the weather improves.

We've been having some very cold weather (cold for us) here. It's nice to be on holidays and just sit by the fire. I should have gone out for a walk yesterday but it was too wet(I'm a sook), so will endeavor to get out today. I think I need to get more exercise. I feel it is lacking. Last week I made myself go to the pool for some laps. Did that twice and it felt good, so will try hard to keep that up.

knicky, glad things are going well.

My temp was up a bit more today, which I'd expect with any cycle. I'm feeling pretty relaxed about it. It would be nice to get a BFP this time, but there's always next time. I'm feeling pleased that I am ovulating at all.

sparklysapphire Sun 08-Jul-12 01:26:57

twirly, I'm really sorry to see you go, but you sound ok about stopping TTC, I hope you are. Please pop in & see us sometimes.
diege, I hope you're feeling a bit better, have managed to shift some marking, and your DH is showering you with TLC. somewhere, I've seen Devon on the news this evening, I hope you're in a less wet part & the holiday perks up. Intruiging (sp?) dream & interpretation. Pocket, I hope your consultant was able to give you good news.

And you're officially pregnant knicky! I've now had sore boobs for about 10 days, much longer than usual, and I too keep prodding them to see if they're still sore - I do not want to be a Les Dawson lady grin, and must remember the lifts at the new workplace are glass, so no surreptious prodding in an empty lift. AF definitely won't arrive on Sunday, but may not be due til Wednesday anyway - I don't know if I can wait that long. I've always thought POAS when AF is very late is the way to go, but now I'm not sure. And having thought that there was no way it'd be my month this month, the soreness is unusual and at least makes me think there's a fair bit of progesterone in my system, and of course is getting my hopes up.

Welcome munchin, southsea, blondie & monster, I hope none of you have to spend to much time here.

Hi to italian, hopeful, angel, blackcats, irish, lol, fireflies, tina, pocket, miasmum,goth, pooley and apologies to anyone I've missed. xx

Munchin Sun 08-Jul-12 10:32:13

Thanks girls for the lovely welcome.

Congrats to knicky and everyone else on their recent bfp's. It's going to take a while to get to know who everyone is.

Sorry twirly that you are leaving but you sound resolute in your decision and that is something I admire. I hope that if I dont get pg in next few months I too can make that decision to stop and be happy with it. really hope that doesn't happen

somewhere hope it stops raining and your hol improves.

sparkly symptom spotting is a pain. Les Dawson comment made me laugh. Fx for you.

diege fair play to you working at home with dc around. That's hard going. They have a sixth sense and keeping looking for attention when you can't give it.

I don't know where I am in this wtf cycle after mmc. It's 11 wks since erpc. I had bleeding/spotting for 7 wks and don't think I got af. 2 wks ago I had Ov pains and got +opk tests. So you'd be thinking either af or bfp would be showing up. But have got 2 bfns and still no af. Just worried agin now that I might be going ino early menopause. I came off pill last August and got af straight away 4 weeks later. Then no af showed for 4 mths. I got af in jan and to pg sometime after that. But never really knew exact date.

Hope everyone has a nice Sunday although it's pretty dull here.

Pocket1 Sun 08-Jul-12 15:17:56

Welcome Munchin I’m still getting to know everyone too.

Diege you sound like superwomen – you need someone bringing you almond croissant type snacks. My DP falls asleep and snoozes at inopportune times too, invariably when there are things to do and it drives me crazy!

Somewhere hope you manage to rest and relax in Devon – and that the weather doesn’t spoil your trip. Btw, what tests are you meant to be having? <interested not nosey>

AFM I saw consultant yesterday and whilst i've been given every hope that i could conceive, have a healthy pregnancy and have a baby, we are literally back to square one. We'd need to join the waiting list for an egg donor (again!) and that may take 3-6 months. DP and I have talked it through and we would both like to try again - and can even, just about, face into the tonne of money this will cost (again!). But the biggest worry is the wait - if i have to wait 6 months for a match, then a month or two to sync/start treatment, i will be 46 by then and that's really freaking me out.... but you never know a donor could be found quicker. In parallel to the clinic searching for me, I'm going to see if i can find my own donor (not really sure how but will post on MN conception and infertility sections and see how that goes - i've seen a few threads previously where lovely donors have come forward so you never know). Alongside that, i'm also looking into going overseas where the waits are shorter, but that feels like a whole lot more hassle with flights, hotels etc. Has anyone been overseas for donor egg ivf? how did you find it all? feel free to PM if you'd prefer... i'd be grateful for any insight you could share.

Hope you're all having a nice Sunday - come on Murray!

knickyknocks Mon 09-Jul-12 08:46:02

pocket, ,<<hugs>> sounds as if you could do with a hug after your appointment yesterday. It's all so terribly frustrating. I can understand your worries about the wait, it feels when you get past 40, that when the months roll by, it feels like a month too long. I haven't got any knowledge when it comes to donor eggs, but I'm sure there's ladies on here who will have knowledge. Why do you have to re-join the waiting list again? (sorry I've no knowledge when it comes to this stuff - it just seems unfair to make you wait again). Please have hope pocket. It's not too late yet.

somewhere Devon in this weather? Hope it brightens up for you and yours this week. It's dreadful weather. Seem to recall last time we went to devon, there was still loads of indoor activities to keep DD amused, but it makes such a difference when the sun shines. Will keep my fingers crossed. Hope you've managed to have a slap up cream tea (indoors activity so no excuse to miss out!)

diege a uni lecturer? I know how hard you work especially with the extra marking at this time of year. I work in a medical school and it's exam season here so know what extra amounts of work lecturers are doing here. It's pretty thankless too this time of year. Hope you get through it quicker than expected and that the 'table discussion' was resolved. If it's any comfort, it's almost exactly the same in my house. DD loves it when my DH looks after her for the day, but I always arrive to a house in the evening which is a tip. EVERY toy is out.

hopeful - your hubby sounds like mine! He's a night owl and because of this he gets a lie in when one's available - as you say, it's not to say I wouldn't like a lie in too as I'm a 'morning person'......a recurring discussion in my house too.

sparkly sore boobs? I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you. Definitely no prodding of boobs in new workplace glass lift grin. Really hoping this is your month.

As for me, am doing OK. The nerves are still there and will be for a while. According to my dates I'm now 4 + 1 so hardly anything at all yet. Walking into work today - still poking my boobs every so often - and the inevitable happened - was caught by an old fella today. He gave me a bemused look - and I tried to ride it out by looking as if I had some kind of twitch. Marvellous. Guaranteed I'll now see him at least another 5 times today because that's sods law for me.

sparklysapphire Mon 09-Jul-12 13:13:29

hi all, just popping in to say I caved yesterday & tested, & got a BFN, but I feel better now I know. On the plus side, as it now looks like this is a longer cycle, ov next month has more chance of coincinding with the 36 hours DH will be home!

Diege Mon 09-Jul-12 13:24:20

Having a sneaky MN break at work. knicky I'm afraid your boob poking episode got me sniggering at my desk grin twitch eh...don't know what else you could say really wink. How are you feeling in general? I have to admit that this extra marking is self-induced, as tis separate to my job and totally voluntary. I've done it for 10 years now though so the income has become in reality part of our annual income, so would be a big loss financially to let it go now...have smuggled a few papers into 'proper' work, so will try and get a few done!
pocket re: overseas egg donation I know nothing, but I'm sure there are those on this thread who have researched this option (*Italian*???). I'm sure someone said there was a good clinic in Spain?
munchkin not sure what to suggest really re: your cycles. Have you spoken to anyone medical? (sorry if I've missed your background/history). It must all be very frustrating, esp the BFNs sad
Sparkly any sign of af? Mine is due Weds too, though of course I'm not looking for a bfp grin
somewhere how goes it with the holiday? Not much of a holiday with MIL I'd say, though I'm sure your's is lovely grin. Re: your question, I'm definitiely time poor, and probably cash poor too after childcare deductions (£1500 a month!!) Still, our choice, so not complaining. Whereas on the (lack of) lie-ins I am definitiely not happy. At this rate I am going to have to conjure up a conference trip and book a room in a travel lodge just to get a decent kip!
Gum Glad you're sounding more positive. I think your dh and mine (and others on here) are cut from the same cloth angry. When I point out the unfairness of it all, he replies that I don't need the lie-in...when of course the reason he does is that he stays up late because he assumes he will get a lie-in...and so the cycle continues. I am NOT happy!
Right, better get on with some work! xxx

gothinrecovery Mon 09-Jul-12 13:33:37

Just dropping in to say hi to everyone, hope you are OK. twirly all the best for the future.

Knicky glad things are progressing.

I am now in the 2WW (CD18 - cycles usually 28 or 29 days) though don't feel particularly positive about chances this month. For some reason I did last month but had no boob soreness so clearly no cigar. I am trying not to drive myself mad remembering when I have had that before AF (and therefore possible chem) as opposed to nothing.

Only dropping in and out as trying not to obsess so apologies if I have missed anyone.

Pocket1 Mon 09-Jul-12 18:00:00

Thanks Knicky for the much appreciated hug and the 'it's not too late' which gives me hope. smile I joined the egg donor waiting list this time last year, got a donor, had two rounds and it didn't work. So I have to go to the back of the queue again. Even making sad eyes didn't help me jump the queue!

Sparkly sorry about your bfn.sad

Fx and biscuitbiscuit for all those who are boob prodding on the 2ww.

Munchin Mon 09-Jul-12 22:31:46

knicky hope boobs are getting sore lo at getting caugh poking them.

SorrySparkly about the bfn!! In the same boat here. But if af hasn't shown up yet then you never know. But hey your right on the bright side the dates will suit you better next month.

Pocket sorry you have to join the queue again. I'm sure you just want to get on with it.

Good luck Goth with the 2ww. Hope it flies in and a bfp at the end.

Diege hope af doesn't show. No I haven't had any medical tests. I had 2 normal pregnancies and we debated too long whether to ttc #3, I feel my af never came back normal since coming off pill. I got pg in either jan/feb and never found out exactly how far on I should have been. But baby had stopped growing at 7+6. Both the consultant and doctor told me to ttc ASAP. My mum reckons she started menopause in her late 30's and as I am now 40 I wonder is it the same for me. Although she had just me when she was 33 but I have had 2 dc.

Hello to everyone else will get to know yous eventually.

Diege Mon 09-Jul-12 22:52:30

Ahh munchkin I see your situation now. I'm not sure I would get too anxious just yet, as it's relatively soon after the erpc. However, it might be worth a GP visit perhaps so that at least your history/cycles are tracked in case you want to have hormone levels etc measured further down the line? Oh and I should mention that I DO NOT want to see a bfp grin. I'm a cheer leading graduate of the thread and am totally done (in) with my 5 Los grin
Hi goth, pocket smile
Love to all, D x

MiaAlexandrasmummy Mon 09-Jul-12 23:05:58

just a quick one to say hello to the newer ladies here, and especially to those on the 2ww and who are boob-poking, twitching, or however best you want to describe it wink... it has taken me to get to 16 weeks pg this time for my boobs to ache. So if you aren't hurting, it doesn't necessarily mean you weren't lucky this time around!! You never know...

hopefulgum Tue 10-Jul-12 00:22:49

Hi everyone, and welcome to any newbies to the thread.

Pocket, there was a lady on this thread a while ago, called rowingboat who had overseas treatment. I don't know if she had donor eggs, but she certainly had treatment in a couple of different overseas clinics. Have you tried the thread about fertility treatment ( can't for the life of me remember what it is called) - Italian would be a help

Munchin - I can see why you would worry, but don't discount the mmc/erpc as a reason for AF being different. After my second miscarriage (and erpc) it took months for my AF to return to normal. I was very scared that I might be going straight into menopause, but everything did come back to normal. My GP frightened me by saying, "Some women go straight into menopause after their last baby", which wasn't at all helpful, but she did order blood tests to see what was going on. And even then, I had a very low estrogen reading and she told me I wasn't ovulating. However, I knew, through charting that I was ovulating, and my progesterone test (7 days post ovulation) showed I was ovulating. And I've since gotten pregnant (but sadly it was an early m/c).

I continued, during that time,to have acupuncture, which was a bit of a saviour as my TCM lady reassured me that my "yin" (to do with fertility)pulse was still good, and that I could still get pregnant. Thank goodness for her or I would have felt much worse and worried a lot more.

I still have quite regular cycles, despite those months of barely a period.

Hello, Miasmummy, how are you? I hope all is well.

My temp went up nicely this morning after a low one yesterday. The chart looks remarkably like the chart I had with Charlie's pregnancy, but anything could happen (I'm only 6dpo). But I'm feeling slightly hopeful, as I've had a few little symptoms. Not going to be too hopeful, as I don't want to get crazy - want to remain relaxed about it all.

I've been managing some exercise everyday (it's so nice being on holiday and having time), which feels good. I've got acupuncture today and will have a swim beforehand.

Deige, I've booked myself a hotel in the city on the weekend - I'm going away by myself! Yay! I'll catch up with some old friends, do some shopping and just enjoy my own company for a couple of days.Can't wait!grin

hopefulgum Tue 10-Jul-12 00:25:21

Oh pocket, I've just had a look and you're already on the Assisted Conception threadhmm.Sorry, that wasn't much help was it?

gothinrecovery Tue 10-Jul-12 13:14:05


I have a question - apologies for TMI.

I have a regular cycle of 28-29 days. However I get EWCM early in the cycle usually on about CD10. I think I usually ov on day 14, certainly that's what the OPK's seemed to suggest when I have used them, but read on here that usually EWCM is 'just before' ov and am wondering if I don't ov when I think I do?

I am obviously mentalling but if anyone has any facts on this would be good to know!

AngelGeorgie Tue 10-Jul-12 19:55:09

Hi Go I always ovulated early ( when testing with opks) I , too have a 28-29 day cycle and ovulate cd 10/11 in fact both times I concieved with Georgie & Phebs it was cd 10 so " earlier" than is text book normal!!! (assume I ve always been the same but with the 2 MCs pre Georgie I wasn t using opks only used them the last
2 years)
That's why I like the SMEP as you re advised to swi from cd 8 every 2 days until you get a + opk then the next 3 days then alternate days for so many days ( memory fails to serve me fully !!! ) hope that helps?
Hi all ; hope u re all well? Not much going on here apart from work & disrupted nights!!! Not a good combination!!!!
Phebs is truely adorable though grin
Hope the new additions to the snug family are thriving?
Love to all xxxx

MiaAlexandrasmummy Tue 10-Jul-12 20:53:45

gothin You probably know all this blush but just in case it helps... I found using a basal body thermometer very useful alongside an OPK. I discovered that I was much earlier ovulating than I had expected (CD8!!), as it helped to confirm that ovulation had actually taken place, when my temp dropped. And once I knew when I was due to ovulate, I saved my OPK test sticks and tested every six hours, as I didn't want to miss that all-important 24-hour magic window of fertility. Also - agree with georgie about the Sperm Meets Egg Plan, it made a lot of sense to me. I liked tracking on the Fertility Friend site too, but maybe that is just me being somewhat geeky...

hopeful all going well here, but a bit stressed about my upcoming Olympic volunteering. So far, I have been assigned and reassigned to four different teams!! I have now said that I want to be in a larger volunteer team, as many are only a solo support role, and I really don't want that responsibility or stress being nearly 5 months' pregnant, especially when I have a long commute and have committed to 6 days' week for 5 weeks, doing days of 8-10 hour shifts, all for free...!

Italiangreyhound Tue 10-Jul-12 22:31:54

Miaalexandersmummy PLEASE do not overdo it with the volunteering and if, at any point, your health looks like it is suffering, please be honest with those you are volunteering for and say you cannot do it. I am sure it will be a great experience so if you can cope, then enjoy it but please do not put your body under any additional pressure.

gothinrecovery Wed 11-Jul-12 09:00:26

Thanks all - I am now seriously wondering if I am actually ov on about CD 12. In which case I have probably missed the boat this month - knackered in the couple of days before that due to too much work. oh well - cross fingers!

Pocket1 Wed 11-Jul-12 18:56:13


Hope everyone is well. Sorry I can't help in the ovulation question - we never got there and instead went straight for donor eggs.

Speaking of which I posted my egg donor help me message on mn, ff and sofeminine. And I have been overwhelmed by the kindness of complete strangers. I am talking to a few ladies and fx my gorgeous lovely donor is there...

Fx I am back in the game quickly!


hopefulgum Thu 12-Jul-12 00:53:38

Pocket, that is great news! I hope it all comes together quickly.

Not much to report here. I have felt a little bit sick, boobs achey and had hearburn, which could mean something,or nothing at all! A few more days til I test.

So Mystic Deige, any feelings about whether I might get lucky this cycle???

We went for a walk up a mountain yesterday. Boy, it was hard work, particularly with a reluctant,"my legs hurt", three year old. He did incredibly well, and the 3 km felt like 10, but I'm glad we did it. It is nice to have time to do things like that. Today I'm tsking my 19 year old son shopping (by his request) to help him with grocery shopping for healthy meals( He lives with friends in town). I couldn't believe it - perhaps all my nagging is paying off!

Is anyone else getting close to the end of the 2ww?

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