Assisted Conception (and the bits in between) Volume 10

[MoJangled]

Our new home, hope you all find me soon...

[MoJangled]

Oh Bugsy . You are sounding incredibly strong and focused, I take my hat off to you. I so wish you didn?t have to be. I?m glad you?re going to get some immune support too. Try this link: Fertility Friends Immunes FAQ it?s a goldmine.

SBC how brilliant to hear your story. Thanks for reminding us that good stuff happens and best wishes for a healthy pregnancy and gorgeous bubba.

Pocket I?m back at work (alas) and trying to stay calm amidst the frenzy; its partly good to take my mind off things but the daytime crapvision/sofa combo does sound preferable! What?s your plan for next week? Monday Monday Monday here we come?.

[Pocket1]

Mojangled how are you doing hon? Hope work is a welcome distraction for you and that you're letting everyone do more than their share! I have two weeks off partly because I have the holiday to take and partly because I could not relax or get a sec to myself if I was working. I will be driving myself mad at home though I'm sure.

Hope everyone else is okay.

X

[MoJangled]

Pocket I think you've done it just right! I have to pack all my neurotic symptom-googling into the evening and get very annoyed with low priority interruptions like making sure we're fed and have clean clothes...

I also am away for work on the official test day so will have to get the blood test a day late, which raises the issue of when to POAS... Normally dont as I like preserving the illusion that it's worked for as long as possible, but having to wait an extra day might just push me over the edge...

How are you doing Weller and Bugsy ? been thinking of you both a lot.

[Scrummybump]

beginnings sorry, didn't mean to ignore you. You did make me laugh. Yup - super thrilled here!

mojangled I fear I was still too poor from the treatment cycle to be feeling anything but extreme tiredness, bit I echo pocket focus on the positives. Now as for the POAS plan....I couldn't face staring at a stick, so would prop still wait...

SBC congratulations. Thanks for sharing your news

pocket resting sounds good to me!

Hi to everyone else and I hope this thread proves to be another lucky one!

[sunnyg]

Apologies all for 'me' post here.
It's been the king of crappy days. Today's scan at 6 weeks 6 days showed no heartbeat. A sac, a yolk but no hb. Completely devastated. Until now, even with previous disappointment have mostly been quite positive. But this is the pits. It's like someone has dangled a big carrot then snatched it away. Clinic wants to wait to week to rescan, just to be sure, but the look on their faces said it all. So looks like am heading for another fun procedure, more prodding and poking for a D & C. That's if I don't miscarry naturally first.
It's been a long day. Lots of tears between period of feeling very numb. Not very much looking forward to more time feeling life is going very slow mo.

[Pocket1]

Oh Sunny sweetheart I am so sorry. I was thinking of you today. I've been there and I know how you're feeling right now. But it's poss that you'll see a hb next week. Thinking of you and dp x

[bugsylugs]

sunnyg oh honey life can be very harsh. know just how I feel like going through what you are going through so have some understanding how painful and wretching this is. here is my hand if you want some hand holding, hugs and all. remind me are you still on the progesterone?. If the repeat scan does show the very worst there are several options and do not be pushed into any without being told all the informatio so you and only you can decide what is right for you. as pocket says there is a little shred of hope but you may well know your body very well as they told me tis week I am very intuitive about my body now ho hum. with DS I had a first scan at very similar dates to you looked like a splodge, no HB next scan it was there. I so very much hope you get a miracle. Both Pocket and I have been where you have been if there is any help we can give let us know I am sure pocket agrees.
(((hugs)))

[bugsylugs]

take time and solace with otherhalf

[Pocket1]

Totally agree with you bugsy. Hugest hugs to you and Sunny

[sunnyg]

pocket and bugsy thank you so much for your kind words. I'm also very sorry about your news bugsy but I echo Mo you are a strong lady.
Won't pretend am feeling very sad. I am. I guess there's a shred of hope we may have a miracle and see a hb next week, but I'm trying also to manage my own expectations. I think if there had been at least some kind of HB, albeit even a small/slow one, then I may feel differently. But there was nothing, literally nothing. So although it's not over yet, I want to be realistic.

Was going to try and go to work, but work up at 3am crying. Literally sobbing. Was so strange. So didn't go in. Feel bad as my boss has been so good through all of this, and I really haven't been there very long. But what can you do.

bugsy yes still on the progesterone. You mentioned they will potentially talk options to me next week. Can you give me an idea on what kinds of things they may say?

oxox

[lucylookout]

Have only just found the thread but wanted to say Sunny, I'm thinking of you. Hopefully it was just a bit early and your scan next week will be better news. In the mean time try to relax and be easy on yourself x

[bugsylugs]

sunnyg reason for asking re progesterone the previous 2 mc for me the progesterone prevented me mc therefore turning them into MMC. This time I think I may have mc regardless.

Warning info below of options do not read until ready or if you need it hugs

So there are 3 ways of managing a mc 1) giving nature time 2) medical management 3) operation called ERPC

1. normally give you about 2 weeks to see if you will pass everything naturally. Advantages no intervention, can be physically gentler less painful than medical at home. Disadvantages can be slow, unpredictable some people feel it drags on.
   
2. medical they give you either tablets, pessaries or tampons or combination of all with medication to stimulate body to mc. May let you do at home with frequent visits to hospital can be intense in visiting hospital. Maybe more painful, more rapid heavier bleeding.
   
3. ERCP operation to remove everything usually under general anaesthetic. Quicker but an relation and invasive so risks. Also more ERCP more risks.
   
   With all you would hopefully have a scan sometime after to ensure all is ok with your womb.
   
   My 3rd mc scan at 2 weeks showed some products had antibiotics and then scan another 10 days later. Very small amount left advised to do nothing period appeared on target. Jan mc very quick scan at 2 weeks ok.
   Pocket went for nature but ended up with ERCP which is a risk with all the options I am sure she can give you more advice. I have always started bleeding within 2 days of stopping progesterone. And bleeding settled within a week. Will see with this one.
   
   Hope that is helpful not too much information can give more if you want

[sunnyg]

thank you so much for all of this info bugsy. At this point my gut reaction is to go with an ERCP. Apart from making sure everything was removed I feel it may help me to move forward quicker. But let's see what Thursday brings.

Just a few more quick questions if you don't mind:

1. I assume if Thursday is bad news I'll be referred from the clinic to my local gp to discuss the options? I was wondering if I should just make a tentative appointment with her anyway to have one ready? the last thing I need at this point is things being dragged out.
   
   
2. Wait time roughly between MC and starting a new cycle? Am not in any hurry yet, I know I need to give myself mentally and physically time. But would be good to know how long a clinic may want to wait. Is it something roughly like 3 AFs?
   
   
3. blood test - should they have done at my first scan to check my hcg or no point? Or will they do one next week at 2nd scan depending on result? Just feels a bit strange that I've not been able to have any blood tests at all throughout this. Or perhaps that's normal?
   
   Thanks again for all of your help. Hope you are doing okay as well oxox

[Pocket1]

Sunny honey. I have lots to say but I'm on mobile so will do proper update over weekend. Bugsy is spot in in what she says.

I was devastated at needing an erpc but it was quick and pain free. And organised v quickly - I think Nhs can sort quickly but I had private insurance and they covered me (even though it was after fertility treatment)

So really don't worry about this should you go this route.

More from me over weekend. Hugs to you.

And Bugsy you really are amazing x
X

[MoJangled]

Sunny Sunny Sunny oh sweetheart. This is just so horribly horribly unfair. Very good call not to go into work and you should give yourself as long as it takes. I don't have the experience of this - my MMC and op were 20 years ago and I'm sure things are different now but you have all my love and support. And who knows what next Thursday might bring.

[bugsylugs]

Sunny

1. my clinic faxed letter to GP to ask them to refer me to local epau clinic which they did by phone. Saw them next day repeat scans lots of places will want their own scan ESP if going for ERCP. I then had op booked for awhile later but that was because I wanted a specific consultant. Cancelled op as nature had taken over. Previous 2 times I bleed for less than a week this time we will se started wed really not much now.
   
   
2. clinics seem to vary on this depending on if you need any further tests. Definitely like at least one af may wait upto 3 cycles to let ovaries recover and reduce risk of OHSS I think.. Remember evidence of conceiving within 6 months of mc means more likely to go to term do not know if this is true for IVF would expect it to be
   
   
3. blood test my clinic and EPAU do not do them I just did them myself. At just over 5 weeks they become less accurate so not sure in our situations they are a good thing. EPAU may ask you to do a preg test after 2 weeks to ensure all has settled. So I would not put too much weight on BHCG I was just naughty.
   
   
   Accuse any typos at nephews sports day with pimms

[Pocket1]

Sunny and Bugys how are you doing? I'm so sorry that you're going through this. Its just unfair, rubbish and crap

Sunny I was told to have post erpc bleed plus one AF then I could cycle again, so two months, but i'm using frozen embies without EC so i guess that's different. Initially I really wanted to cycle asap but ended up making a late decision to have some mini-immunes done, which pushed things back another month.

Although emotionally i was a wreck, physically it was all far easier than i'd anticipated.

My natural mc was fine - not much more than AF really. And although i was just horrified at needing the ERPC (i'm a baby when it comes to hospitals and procedures - i know, i know its ironic), it was a very easy procedure and i was in and out in a day. I had some paracetemol on drip in the recovery room for the mildest of AF-type pain but i needed absolutely no pain killers at all in the few days after. The bleed was a bit heavier than AF but again, really not that bad. I had completely wound myself up, so if you're doing the same, please please please dont.

re blood tests, I only had one for the pregnancy test. Nobody ever mentioned hcg levels to me but I know some of the girls here have had them tested weekly (think clinics work differently). If I get a bfp this time, I will ask about repeat hcg tests and I'll let you know what they say so we all know for future.

Sunny, all that said, i'm still hoping you get better news next week.

Bugsy hope you're enjoying sports day with that pimms! Will you stop at one?

Mo how are you doing on the old bench? When is oft?

How is everyone else? Badger Maple Scrummy how are those bumps coming along?

So as well as my daily cocktail of pills and patches. And my clexane jab (which i've got the hang of now), i'm also on daily progesterone jabs too. The first three were done by the clinic, but tonight, DP will do his first one . I'm a bit scared as he has a high pain threshold and is very blase about medical stuff. Nothing phases him so i'm praying he'll be gentle!!

[MoJangled]

*Sunny Chickie, how are things? Bugsy and Weller, how are you? (Pimms nothwithstanding mmmm....)

Pocket tomorrow's the big day! How many are you going for?

My semi-formed plan to test early today and present DH with a BFP as a fathers day pressie has been scuppered by buying cheapo Sainsbo test that only works on AF day and only holds result for an hour. So haven't and probably a good thing as a BFN would have been more likely 4 days early anyway and might have killed the theme...

I have a feeling not everyone's found the new thread so might do some bumping!

[Pocket1]

Mo such a pain about the test. I don't know how they work in terms of it being too early. But it sounds like yours is a very specific 'not right for today' one

Here's to us all celebrating next years fathers day with bells on

I am really hoping for that BFP for you.

I'm going for 2 tmw - hoping and praying they survive the thaw....

Happy Sunday everyone

[bugsylugs]

Pocket good luck for tomorrow go embies go. Stopped at one jug of pimms!

[MoJangled]

Bugsy impressive level of self control there, not sure I wouldnt have seen the first jug as a warm-up

Pocket everything, literally everything, crossed for tomorrow

Sunny babe, how are things?

I have a huge bloat on, can't hold tummy in and shamefully undoing wasteband of trousers in car. Every second thing I say to DH is a nag. Progesterone really is to blame for most things that get women written into Shakespeare as shrews. That said we've just had a lovely day out flying a kite on top of the downs and discovering a lovely ramshakle pub for lunch, so even with a shrew he's having a good fathers day. Hear Hear to your motion for next year Pocket!

[chickenfordinner]

Ladies can I ask your advice about something. I am a LONG Term lurker on this thread (like, to the extent I feel like I know loads about you all and log on anxiously when people are due to test ) and on the Ivf/icsi one (though thats gone a bit quiet recently) but a very rare poster. Not sure why really. I have quite a busy job and some chronic health problems which mean that I can't always post regularly, and don't like to start something I then don't keep up... But anyway I am due to start my second cycle of icsi soon. Last cycle we only got 1 egg (I have v low AMH) but it fertilised perfectly and we got a biochemical pregnancy so feel like we almost got there. I've got a good friends hen do in the run up to poss EC and she is going to go ape (which I obviously have said no to) and also people are going to a salon for manicures. Would you do this about 6 days before EC? I don't want to be overly cautious (and don't want to say no to everything, as it is I won't be drinking ) but am worried about nasty chemicals? I've switched a lot of our home cleaning products to non toxic ones as have read that chemicals can be harmful so seems silly to then sit and breathe in chemically air for an hour.

What would you do??

Lots of luck for pocket with FET tomorrow and mo with testing. Huge hugs to sunny and bugsy, life really isn't fair sometimes, and hi to everyone else.

[MoJangled]

ChickChickChickChickChicken GrowALovelyEggForMe - well, for you, obviously, but that wouldnt have rhymed! Very nice to meet you and thanks for the good wishes. What a close thing with your last cycle, how agonising but also positive... And very very good luck with the forthcoming one. I honestly think you'd be fine with a nail salon. One thing I've learned in all this is that it doesnt do to completely close down your life. As long as you're basically looking after yourself the majority of the time, you're doing it right. It's easy to get paranoid about all the things that could wreck a cycle, I know, but having a nice occasion (and releiving yourself of the stress of letting down your friend) could even help reduce stress levels, which would help. Of course you should only do it if you'll be happy doing it, but that's my take.

[wellerbabe]

Thought I had lost you all forever. Just found u again only to read your bad news sunny I'm so sorry.

Catch up with you all soon xxx

[Keziahhopes]

Chickenfordinner - hello I am Keziah, with a 15 week old ds and had lots of support from people here. The one thing I learnt on our long journey to being parents is that you need to do whatever is right for you, so that whatever decisions you make you can live with whatever happens with treatment. So for eg, I was given tickets to the ballet in my 2ww after ICSI but it was a long drive, late at night etc so I chose to not go (and it was a real treat I missed!) just in case (I got a bfn) so that I didn't say to myself for ever "if only". Other people have different thresholds and as long as they are happy with what they do I think that is all that matters. All the best - do let us know how it goes!!