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emotional roller coaster

(4 Posts)
Mersea Fri 08-Jul-11 10:23:53

Hi I am 39 and ttc my first since a mc 4yrs ago (i have been suffering with depression so not able to try again until now). So now been trying for about 3 months and for the first time ever af was late and I thought omg this is it. I went into blind panic, cried a lot and just kept thinking what have I done. This is a stupid idea at my age, me and my partner were fine why change things. It certainly wasn't the elated joy I thought I would feel, anyway a couple of days on it settled a bit and although I still felt scared I tried not to think about it too much. Anyway af arrived today and once again I cried lots and got worried that maybe I was never going to fall and that time was running out and I would not have any children at all. So now I am left wondering what to do. Do I try again next month after feeling so negative and scared when I thought I was or do I listen to how I felt when I realised I wasn't? Anyone else have these emotions that change so quickly? It does make deciding if you really want to have a baby so hard.

lalabaloo Sun 10-Jul-11 23:03:22

I think it is a normal worry, you want to have a positive result so badly but obviously it will be a huge lifestyle adjustment when it does actually happen. I think you have to trust your gut instinct, if the majority of the time it seems the right decision then it probably is, but of course there will always be the odd wobble x

Mersea Fri 15-Jul-11 08:44:46

Thank you. It is good to hear someone else rationalise things, it is something I am not too good at myself. I know I need to trust my instincts a little more, I just wish I was not such a worrier and allow things to go round and round in my head. I need to go with the flow a bit more and just allow things to happen but easier said than done!!

lalabaloo Fri 15-Jul-11 13:58:11

It's okay i'm completely the same, I want a baby so badly but then I think of other things that I won't be able to do, or people say to me that they don't recommend having kids young cos you haven't lived yet etc. I usually have a good sob to my DH and he reassures me that we know what we want and not to worry about the other things x

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