Trying to conceive at 44

[Strawberry44]

Hi,
I've just joined Mumsnet. I wanted to see if there's anyone out there in the same position as me, and to see if there are any hopeful stories, or any advice anyone can give me.

I'm 44, and have been TTC for 18 months. I don't have any children. We've been told that I have unexplained infertility and should go for IVF. I'm searching around on the web for fertility clinics, and looking at success rates of women my age becoming pregnant, is making feel pretty unhopeful.

Is there anyone out there in there mid 40s who has conceived either naturally or with IVF, who could give me any kind of advice on how to improve my chances of conceiving?

I'm planning to see an acupuncturist and Homeopathist very soon. I feel time is running out so quickly, if it hasn't already.

[lovesmountains]

Hi Strawberry,

Sorry to hear your story, and I totally empathise.
We have been TTC for 2 years and I'm 44 and I find the whole experience can be quite consuming and an emotional rollercoaster.

I am however totally blessed to have a 6 year old DD(conceived on month 1) but I'd so love her to have a brother or sister.

My GP prescribed Clomid in February, to stimulate ovulation, and I fell pregnant after 2 months, but sadly this ended in a misscarriage at 8 weeks. I'm now back on Clomid and I can have 6 months of treatment so 4 more to go.

I've been told I'm too old for IVF (we are not in the UK- so this may be different for you) so I feel like clomid is my last chance.

I must say I've been so desperate to conceive that I wonder sometimes if I'm so stressed it's stopping nature taking it's course. So, easier said than done, Im trying to relax and say what will be will be. I've started running which is helping me feel better and drinking lots of nettle tea- I read somewhere on mumsnet that nettle tea can help with fertility.

Wishing you much luck on your journey strawberry,

[Strawberry44]

Thankyou so much for your message lovesmountains.
So sorry to hear about your miscarriage.
I'm reading that stress can be quite a huge factor, when TTC. My GP hasn't really given me very much information at all. I don't even know about clomid...it's never been mentioned. I do feel like I have been left to get on with it myself. All my info has come from the net. I have heard that when you do have the attitude of 'what will be, will be', then that's when things start to happen. I'd love to be able to feel like this, but I am feeling there is so little time. Maybe some acupuncture could help with this.

It feels very surreal to think that I may never have a child.

Good luck with everything. I think you have the right state of mind for something to happen for you.

[hippychick66]

Hi. I'm on a 40+ thread. There are many different situations going on on the thread. I am 44 and am TTC but I am lucky to have 2 sons already. i did also have 2 MC's last year. One of the people on the thread is about to do IVF with doner eggs. There are about 4 pregnant women at the moment on the thread.

Please do come and join us or at least have a peak at all the different people and their situations.

Good luck with your journey.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1182749-Feisty-Fabulous-Forty-somethings-part-3

[Ragwort]

I conceived naturally at 42 if that counts - I wasn't trying very hard (ie: not timing when to have sex/taking temperature or anything) - it took approx. six months - tbh DH was much keener than I to have a DC .

[itsohsoquiet]

Sorry I don't have any tips but my grandmother conceive naturally and had a healthy baby at 43. I have heard of others conceiving naturally at that age too so there is hope.

[Stangirl]

My grandmother never used contraception and had 2 children - one at 37 and one at 45 - both healthy children.

I used donor egg IVF for my pregnancies and I had DD at 41 and will be having DS at 42 in July. You may want to visit the fertilityfriends website - they are a bit NM-ish but are a fount of knowledge for all things fertility based.

If you have the money just cut to the chase and go to a private clinic - a lot of the london ones are good. Personally I'm post-menopausal so had no choice but I heartily recommend donor egg IVF - very high success rates, saves a lot of heartache. I use the Ceram clinic in Marbella Spain.

[Strawberry44]

Hi. I really appreciate all your messages. Thankyou.
I've just been on the phone to a hospital about success rates for women of my age using IVF. He told me their success rate was less than 2% and was really honest (which I appreciated), in telling me that I would be wasting my money to go down the IVF route...unless I used donor eggs. We haven't really thought of this an option so far. I think we'll keep trying naturally, and if nothing happens, then we have something huge to get our heads around. x

[DuelingFanjo]

I was 40 when I had my baby by IVF. I followed some diet tips on the 'fertilityfriends' forum just to improve egg quality before the IVF. It involved lots of protein, full fat milk and wheatgrass. I really do believe that you can improve egg quality and get that one good egg.

good luck.