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Mumsnetters aren't necessarily qualified to help if your child is unwell. If you have any serious medical concerns, we would urge you to consult your GP.

found out today my dd1 has to wear glasses. feeling sad. come and cheer me up please!

(45 Posts)
nowwearefour Sat 22-Aug-09 13:38:31

that says it all - she is long sighted with an astygmatism in both eyes. she is just 4. about to start big school. i fear her feeling un confident and not making friends as quickly....

3cutedarlings Sat 22-Aug-09 13:44:15

Awww dont feel sad!!! both my DDs wear specs, as i do, we are a fab advert for specsavers at our house grin.

The kids at school will all be very envy, neither of my girls have never had any problems at all, the other children think they are very cool!!!

IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern Sat 22-Aug-09 13:45:50

DD has had glasses since she was 2 and it has never ever been a problem.
Glasses don't have the same stigma attatched as when we were younger so many children wear glasses now and in fact a lot of the children are envious of the ones that do.
You get some gorgeous frames now as well so you will find a fab pair that suit her.
DD's just now are pink Hannah Montana frames and she really suite them.
DD has been to nursery and recently changed primar schools since she got hers and there has always been more than one child in her classes also wearing glasses so it is unlikely your dd will be the only one.

She will feel unconfident if she picks up on your negativity. I was sad when dd got hers more because I have worn glasses for a long time and was upset that she was being stuck with them so young not because it ever occured to me there might be a problem with making friends.

FabBakerGirlIsBack Sat 22-Aug-09 13:46:28

My DH was gutted when DS1 had to wear glasses and I got ripped apart when I posted that on here.

He worried over nothing. DS1 copes fine, some other kids have glasses and they are some really cool frames these days. I had the crappy NHS ones as the foster carers wouldn't pay for half decent ones.

IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern Sat 22-Aug-09 13:46:52

Oh and dd had a patch when she was younger now she doesn't need it but wants one as there are 2 people in her lcass with them hmm so seriously glasses will be no problem.

3cutedarlings Sat 22-Aug-09 13:47:01

and i have just had my DS refered by my HV to the childrens eye clinic due to our family history hmm, he is only 5 mths olds shockgrin

leisurely Sun 23-Aug-09 07:29:15

Better to wear glasses than not be able to see. Our girl had an eye test at school last year, we were advised to go to an eye doctor (in Switzerland you can't just go to an optician), he found out that she had pretty bad short sightedness which could explain why she sits so close to the telly! I felt awful for not considering this. She now has a collection of gorgeous glasses - we were in the UK for the summer, specsavers allowed us to get three pairs and have her sunglass lenses replaced for 100 pounds including a new sight test. Here, her first pair cost over 500 and there was the 250 doctors fee on top. Be happy that you are somewhere that things like that are affordable and they do have some tremendous frames.

BonsoirAnna Sun 23-Aug-09 07:43:13

My DD is 4.9 and wears glasses for long-sight.

Before getting her glasses she was beginning to squint, which is very unattractive and potentially dangerous, leading to loss of sight. Now she has had her glasses for two months she no longer squints when she takes her glasses off. And she LOVES them!

BonsoirAnna Sun 23-Aug-09 07:45:50

Many, many more children are diagnosed with long sight and wear glasses young than a generation ago. This is a very good thing, as far fewer children will lose their sight, and the fact that so many little children wear glasses has reduced stigma.

seeker Sun 23-Aug-09 07:52:44

My dd has glasses, red hair, freckles, a posh accent and if you change one letter in part of her last name it makes a rude word.

She's 13, and the only thing from the list she has never been teased about is her glasses!

nowwearefour Mon 24-Aug-09 19:46:59

wow. thank you all for being so encouraging. and also for such positive comments about specsavers as we have ordered some great mr tickle ones from there. i feel so much better thanks. and of course i have not let her know any of my negativity. i am wanting her to be positive about them. thanks so much ! i feel really so much better.

Piglett Tue 25-Aug-09 13:48:21

Wanted to add another positive note. My DS was 2 when he had to wear his glasses and I was mortified, I cried. We have to go to Alder Hey for his eye appointments and to be honest when I arrived I felt ashamed that I had felt bad about the eye problem. There are so many kids there who have huge issues many life threatening that I was very quickly humbled!

DS is very active and we have broken too many pairs of glasses to count but he loves wearing them - he can see when he wears them so that must be a bonus! Loads of kids wear glasses now (and the horrid NHS ones of our youth are no longer the only option) and I don't know any child who has been teased. We did have problems with the patching and I think we will need to patch again soon which will be fun but the glasses have never caused any issues.

When I felt bad a colleague told me that they think their grandchild looks odd when not wearing glasses as they are so used to seeing him in them - I thought that would never happen to me but it has and if he isn't wearing them in a photo (ie in the bath) I look at the photo and often wonder why he looks odd!

Good luck!

UnquietDad Tue 25-Aug-09 13:54:12

Glasses do seem to be cool nowadays. They aren't like they used to be. Lots of girls and young women look very stylish indeed in glasses. And there are lots of attractive bespectacled role-models.

Iklboo Tue 25-Aug-09 13:56:49

DS is upset he doesn't have to wear glasses and will occasionally be found wearing the ones from Mr Potato Head perched on his nose
Kids' glasses are far trendier than the NHS (Nashies) we used to have in the 70s/80s

hotpotmama Tue 25-Aug-09 14:06:06

My DS1 was told he had to wear glasses and I was like you, feeling sad for him about it. But they look really cool, his friends have asked their mums if they can wear glasses too and they really suit him. They don't stop him doing anything and he has never been picked on or singled out because of it.

Glasses are cool nowadays for kids, not like the old NHS ones when I was younger.

Just after he started wearing them my DS3 was very ill and hospitalised for a few weeks and it definitely put the glasses worry into perspective then as I saw so many sick children in that time. I felt ashamed of my worrying about glasses compared to what all the parents of these sick children had to worry about.

You'll love them after a few weeks! smile

tiredOFTHEDMemma Tue 25-Aug-09 14:14:07


My Ds2 has worn glasses since he was 4 (and hadto do eye patching for a year).

I cant imagine him without his glasses now they are part of him (he has lovely blond hair and looks like the Milky Bar Kid!)

It has never been a problem at school ( He also has glasses from The Mr Men range at Specsavers - Mr Tickle and a spare pair, Mr Bump!)

DidEinsteinsMum Tue 25-Aug-09 14:38:05

Ds wears glasses. He has no problems confidence wise and with others due to his glasses. He has problems due to his lack of social skills, but the glasses are often the key to breaking the barrier of his weird unusual behaviour with the other kids. I suspect he would be teased and ignored more without the glasses rather then with.

bodenaddict Tue 25-Aug-09 14:52:04

found out my dd1 had to wear glasses when she was 3 and a half she is 4 years now.
i found it a shock to start with and a pain.

was worried about her breakin them
losing them
not wearing them

took me a while to get used to her having them now they are a part of her makes her look more grown up she is small for her age and really suit her.
we niticed a big difference in her when she started wearing them too.
moodiness stopped and wetting.

she luvs her glasses has 2 wear them all the time except pe.
she has 2 pairs of little miss naughty glasses.
u get to choose from a great selection.

you will get used to them soon

itchyandscratchy Tue 25-Aug-09 15:40:21

Dd1 has been wearing glasses for reading and tv for about 8 months now and loves them. They really suit her and her best friend is constantly telling her mum that she can't see properly so she can have some glasses like dd1!

Dd1 has got a pair with spongebob on the end of the arms which lots of kids in her class think is really cool.

bellissima Tue 25-Aug-09 15:54:14

DD1 (ten) has been wearing glasses since she was two (long sight). Like others here I wept when she was first diagnosed but now hardly think about it. And of course the myopics in her class are now starting to be prescribed glasses.

And they will probably all be losing contact lenses all over the place by the time they are in their mid-teens...

jybay Tue 25-Aug-09 16:04:24

Just be glad she was diagnosed this early. No one picked up that I was blind as a bat till I was seven (I kept falling downstairs and bumping into things but my mother just thought I waas "unusually clumsy" smile). I therefore had to learn to read without actually being able to see the board at school - of course, I didn't realise that everyone else could see.

I wore glasses from 7, didn't get teased at all at primary school and only very mildly at secondary school. Dont worry about it - just be glad she can see.

Saltire Tue 25-Aug-09 16:17:45

I have just come back from Specsavers today with DS1 who needs glasses. he ahs been complaining for a while of headaches -especially when watching TV, or on the PC or PS". The optician said he needs them for "concentraion work" such as PC, reading looking at blackboard etc. He has chosen some really cool ones with orange frameshmm. I thought he'd be really stressed about it, especially since he is going into year 7 in September and has a lot of toehr stresses in his mind just now, but he's cool about it

Dysgu Tue 25-Aug-09 16:18:03

DD1 has been wearing glasses for nearly a year now - she is about to turn 3. She is very long sighted with a lazy eye and a squint!

She has to wear her glasses all the time (is currently asleep on the sofa and was still wearing them when she dozed off!) and has to wear a patch for 3 hour a day too.

The brain haemorrhage (sp?) she had when she was born was predicted to lead to all sorts of things - and the only one that materialised is the non-development of her eyes. I actually see her glasses as a sign of how lucky we are compared to what we were told to expect.

She has always been good at wearing her glasses - one pair is pink and the other is purple. The NHS patch was not much good so I got framehuggers from the USA and they have been fabulous. She has 4 and chooses one each day to match her outfit. grin (And her left, lazy, squinty eye is already catching up with the right one much to the amazement of the ophthalmologist at the hospital).

She goes to playgroups and pre-school and to the childminder. She has never had anything other than positive comments regarding either her glasses or her patches.

In the future they plan to operate to tighten the muscle to correct the squint but I hope to put that off until she is older as then it is more likely to be successful.

Wearing glasses is not usually something children tease each other about these days - I speak as a primary school teacher - but wearing glasses can make such a diffeence to a child. I am always surprised by the number of parents who wither a) worry about negative impact of wearing glasses or b) haven't had their child's eyes tested until I mention that their child is aparently struggling to see things in the classroom.

mooki Tue 25-Aug-09 16:27:57

Sorry to thread crash but how did you all find out your children needed glasses?

Did you suspect there was something wrong and ask someone about it? Or is there some kind of routine referral?

I have quite rubbish eyesight and wore glasses from a young age and I don't know if that means I should get 2 year old DD checked out as a matter of course?

I think we should get a 2 year check invitation and I was planning on asking then - I haven't seen a health visitor for over a year...


Northumberlandlass Tue 25-Aug-09 16:59:45

My DS 5 (6 in two weeks) was been wearing his glasses for almost a year. He was diagnosed with having astigmatism in both eyes through the school eye test. I really had never noticed that there was anything wrong with his sight and apparently it is quite bad blush

DS has to wear glasses all the time and is a cool dude ! I do pay extra for his cool specs, but it is well worth it. He has never been bullied / teased about them and some of his mates even asked if they could get glasses too !

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