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losing the plot

(2 Posts)
JayJayTop Wed 07-Jan-15 11:39:43

This is my first post here. I didn't want it to be one long moan-fest but fear it is (sorry). I wasn't sure where to post, nor what I hope to get out of posting - similar stories perhaps? Advice on getting through maybe?

I'm feeling desperate. I have 8-month-old twins who have been ill for six weeks with coughs, colds, burst ear drums, ear infections, Roseola, teething and now a tummy bug that won't shift, starting Xmas Eve with vomiting and diarrhoea.

Through all this, I've also had a cold and cough and been awake every night dealing with the babies and my 11-year-old (who also got the bug on Xmas eve) and hosted Christmas for 12 people. The babies are filling their nappies almost every half hour and have developed red raw nappy rashes that just will not shift. I have tried everything. The constant poos mean it's a losing battle. The nappy rashes are the new things keeping them up all night.

Today they are going to see the doctor for the fourth time in five weeks.

As well as this, my two step-children (10 and 7) have been staying and my partner goes to pieces when they come. They are demanding children and he is their loyal servant. My resentment towards him is building and he's not done anything wrong other than being a total pushover, buying them new stuff all the time, just shopping, shopping, shopping (pretty much all they do).

He acts as if I'm asking him to travel to the moon when I ask him to look after the twins so I might be able to get out of the house (been stuck inside for so long). We are barely on speaking terms. The only way I am managing to write this is in my work time!

The continued sleep deprivation has made me snappy and nervy. The problem with the sleep is once I've settled one baby, I then imagine I'm hearing the other and I stay awake for hours at a time. Last night it was 3-6:30 when I get up. Night before it was 2-5 and so on. Night after night.

My daughter needed help with her Science revision over the Xmas holidays and I could barely help (partner was away). The odd hour here or there was spent helping with revision. I'm overwhelmed with guilt for being so horribly stressed with her too.

I remind myself constantly that this won't last forever, that I'm not dying of cancer, have not lost my family in the Syrian conflict and am very, very lucky to have these babies. I know I must not complain but at times I feel I'm sinking and want to scream VERY LOUDLY.

Any advice on dealing with sick twins and step families most gratefully accepted.

Thank you
JJ

Gunpowder Wed 07-Jan-15 21:53:48

I don't have any experience of sick twins or step DC but it sounds like you are doing an amazing job just staying afloat. I hope things get easier soon. Do you have a mum/sister/good friend locally who can come and give you a hand? Even if just for a couple of hours? Sounds so tough. brew

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