advice re son in night nappies at 5 1/2

[Maria9292]

Hi all,
This is my first ever post so here goes:
My DS is 5 and a half and has been toilet trained since 3 in the day but never dry at night. He has never actually wet the bed as he has always been in nappies then pull ups and now 'pyjama pants'.
We have never made anything out of this and he seems unworried. Various friends etc. have all said not to worry, boys take longer and that the doc would tell me to come back when he is 7. We have upped his fluids in the day to help him wee more then.
Which is all good, but he was invited to stay a friend's house and I had to say no. He does stay with our family but I am unsure how his friends would treat him when he puts on his nappy.
I think I need to have the conversation with him about trying to fix this but not make him feel bad.
Any advice would be so welcome .
Thanks

[mumblechum1]

That does seem rather late, and I think it would be better if you just put a rubber sheet on his bed and told him that if he has an accident, to either change the sheet (if you think he'd be okk with that), or to wake you and you'll help him.

Until he gets the message to his brain that weeing in his sleep=discomfort and messing around, he'll keep doing it imo.

[olivo]

I was told by my GP that is is NOT abnormal for a 5yo to still be in pj pants. Until they produce enough of a certain hormone that tells their kidneys/bladder to slow down at night, they have very little choice. my DD is stil in PJ pants at 5.1, as are several in her class.

I appreciate it must be tricky re sleepovers, but a discreet word to the mum/dad should probably work - you may find the friend still isnt dry, but they will ,i 'm sure, help your DS to discreetly put on his pants.

[Marne]

My 5.5 year old is still in nappies at night and i'm sure she's not the only one (i know a few), theres no way i would make her change the bed if she wet it .

[FreakoidOrganisoid]

DD (also 5) still wears night nappies too. WE've tried without them a few times but always ended up with wet beds. She has just started having more frequent dry nights though so I'm hopeful it won't be forever!

[CMOTdibbler]

Its not unsusual at all - my 5 yr old ds sleeps like the dead and doesn't even wake up if he does wet the bed, so wouldn't wake up to wee.

He goes on sleepovers and is quite confident enough to say he needs his pyjama pants as the wee escapes in the night.

[FunnysInTheGarden]

DS1 is coming up to 6 and was in pullups until this Easter and has only been reliably dry since the summer. We bribed him with a DSi to give him an incentive and it did work. We had a small relapse at the end of term, but since then he has been fine.

I wouldn't worry about it, I'm sure he will do it when ready.

[faverolles]

Drs won't refer to an enuresis clinic until he is 7, because until then, it is completely normal to wee at night.
I think you need to do your best to explain to your DS that this isn't a problem, and I certainly wouldn't let it stop him going to sleepovers if he wants to go.
At that age, it's estimated that as many as 1 in 4 children are not reliably dry at night (according to the leaflet I was given when dd went to the enuresis clinic) so it's certainly nothing to be ashamed of. Your DS could get into pj's and night pants in the bathroom.
My dd was 8 before she was dry. She told all her friends, who were all fine with it and it didn't stop her doing anything.
Please don't let him wet the bed and change his own sheets, that would be a sure-fire way to destroy his self esteem and probably wouldn't do anything about the night wetting.

[OneHandFlapping]

One of my DS's wet the bed pretty much every night until he was 13. Then it stopped, virtually overnight. At 5 or 6 he was quite ok with it, but by the time he was 9 or 10, it was obviously his shameful little secret - not from our attitude I might add, as we always tried to reassure him that it was just one of those things. It broke my heart to see him so ground down about it, and he was like a new boy when it finally stopped.

One thing we did try which worked for him was desmopressin nasal spray, which he used from the age of 10 for sleepovers and school trips. Of course by that age he was old enough to self administer.

[Notnapping]

My ds is 5.6 and still wearing them as well have tried the not wearing them reward chart method but didn't work all I end up with is a nightly bed change I'm not too concerned though.

[feetheart]

My DS is 6 in 2 weeks time and still in night-time pants.

We are having more dry nights - 1 or 2 a week but he has decided himself that he needs to be dry for 3 nights in a row before he does without them. I have NO idea where this has come from, certainly not us. He is still fine with it all so we are too.

Don't think wearing them on a sleepover would bother him but then not much does :)

[Maria9292]

Thank you everyone. Just hearing from so many of you has helped, knowing that it's not just us!
Since I posted I did have a chat with DS about weeing at night, staying with friends etc. He has decided that when he is 6 (in 7 months) he'll stop wearing the pants so Im going to softly softly over the next few months mention it and try and motivate him.
I did say that he could try going to the toilet if he wakes up at night (although he rarely does) and in the mornings getting straight up and having a wee. Sometimes I'm sure he has a morning wee in the pj pants cos it's easy!
It would be great if we could have a one completely dry night and really celebrate but this has not happened. This week we've had a few quite drys and then this morning when he got up and came downstairs he'd already taken off his pj pants and pj bottoms cos he had wet through.
Thanks again
Maria x

[FunnysInTheGarden]

it is tough, but don't let it bother you too much. I know this time last year we were really worried, but lo and behold he is now dry and we have forgotten all about the years he wasn't!

[lucybrad]

I have ID twin boys - one had been dry at night since 4, the other still regularly wets at 7.5. I really must remember to take him to the doctors about it.

[Maria9292]

Thanks again. Just reading everyones' helpful comments made me smile
Have a lovely weekend all