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I am really cross with my childminder, come and help me broach this without losing my temper....

(39 Posts)
itsmeolord Mon 09-Nov-09 12:53:03

Hi,

have posted before about childminder who whilst lovely and very very good with kids, does lots with them etc is also terribly disorganised and this has caused issues.

Thought it was sorted. She gave me short notice that she wanted to go away for two weeks, the october halfterm week and the following week. She definitely said two weeks, definitely those two weeks...
I have no holiday at all, only recently started shiny new job that I love.
DP took the week after half term off and I took the half term week off unpaid.

New bosses weren't particularly chuffed and I had to do some work at home etc to appease them.

Anyway, she should have been back end of last week, called and texted. No replies.

Still couldn't get hold of her this morning, took dd to school and bumped into a mum of another child that she minds.

The childminder called her last week to say she would not be back until this Thursday!

I have no childcare for this week now and lots and lots of work to do. Obviously I can work the school hours but my job is normally an work till it's done kind of thing out of necessity for the field I am in.
In the current climate I cannot afford to lose this job, I am still in my probation period and this is not going to look good for me.
No family nearby who could help, dp has no holiday left now because of the week he took.

I have been made redundant twice this year, childminder knows all of this.

I am so utterly fucked off that she has called another of the parents but basically either forgotten me or just not bothered to call.
She knows full well I would not be able to cover another nearly full week of no childcare, add to that the fact that I have already paid her for the month so she has had two weeks full whack and two weeks holiday pay, this should have been almost 3 weeks holiday pay of that was her plan.

I know I am ranting but I am so cross, have bee thinking about this all morning and don't really know best course of action.
I don't want to sack her as there really is no spaces in this area at the moment and dd loves it there.
But, this has really really screwed me. Am uset that she thinks it's ok to treat me/us like this as well.
Bfore she left she was hugging me on the doorstep and thanking me for holding back her money so that she wouldn't spend it before the holiday. (she asked me too, she is crap with money)

I appreciate this is a holiday of a lifetime for her and her family, (they are in disney florida) but I cannot believe how she has behaved.

What would you do in my situation? I really need to calm down, am so cross.

itsmeolord Mon 09-Nov-09 12:54:40

Apologies, clearly I am so cross that I have lost the ability to spell and type correctly. blush

IrritatedMe Mon 09-Nov-09 12:55:05

You need to look for another childminder. Most are lovely so that won't be a problem.

Most are reliable so have one up on your feckless CM. She is an idiot. You poor poor thing.

Poledra Mon 09-Nov-09 12:56:54

Can't help, as I am angry on your behalf. My CM would never dream of doing anything as thoughtless and unreliable as this. I'd be looking elsewhere, I think

saadia Mon 09-Nov-09 12:57:15

You do need reliable childcare - emergencies can come up for anyone - but she doesn't sound reliable or professional. Would after-school club be an option?

LoveMyGirls Mon 09-Nov-09 12:57:48

Surely there is a bit about holiday in the contract so if she has broken it then you are free to put your child with another childminder without notice? I know my contracts state that I must give written notice 2 weeks before holiday.

I'm not suprised you are furious!

IrritatedMe Mon 09-Nov-09 12:58:31

Just re-read that.

Didn't realise there were no spaces in the area. You need to sit her down and tell her that reliability is top of your priorities and that if she can fulfil that requirement you need to know NOW.

See what she says.

Fabster Mon 09-Nov-09 13:00:58

You can get a temporary nanny who will come in immediately.

You have to sack your CM. She has treated you like crap and she will do so again.

Don't be held over a barrel by someone who is treating you like an inconvenience.

itsmeolord Mon 09-Nov-09 13:04:46

sad Yep, I suppose I am going to have to terminate. I really don't want to because she really is very good with and for the children but also, the last childminder I had before dd I had to give notice to and complain to ofsted about. She was truly awful and is no longer registered. It was horrid because I hadn't know about a lot of things that had gone on and I really felt I'd failed dd.

I could do the temporary nanny thing but funds are tight after the unpaid week and I only got my first wage packet in 4 months 3 weeks ago....

Blondeshavemorefun Mon 09-Nov-09 13:05:42

not suprised you are angry

your cm has let you down and makes you look unprofessional in your new job

ring a nanny agency and get a temp nanny

where are you? maybe someone on here can help?

you say there are no other spaces, but sounds to me that your cm is useless and sure the same thing will happen again - so you do need to look at alturnative childcare options

ItsAllaBitNoisy Mon 09-Nov-09 13:06:03

I don't blame you for being furious.

You need a new CM. Maybe explain to your new boss, how this will be sorted, how much you love your job, know it is inconvienient etc ASAP?

notnowbernard Mon 09-Nov-09 13:07:03

I remember your last thread

You need to GET RID, surely?

StealthPolarBear Mon 09-Nov-09 13:08:01

as this is an emergency, can you ask any mums at school to have your DD for the days that week, and you'll reciprocate when you're a bit more back on your feet?
Or any clubs / after school care / friends who could help?

thedollshouse Mon 09-Nov-09 13:09:37

I agree with iaabn. Go to your boss explain that you are furious that this has happened and inform them that you are seeking a new childminder as a matter of urgency.

Give your childminder notice and negotiate a discount for the remaining time. She has put you in an impossible position and is being extremely unprofessional.

Danthe4th Mon 09-Nov-09 13:21:55

I would call your local council and ask for a contact for the childminding development officer(different name different councils) I would explain to her what has happened and ask if anyone is newly registering in the area, she may be able to suggest someone and she may also have a word with this childminder.What council are you under someone may have the contact details on here.
That is extremely unprofessional and gives childminders like me a bad name.

nannyl Mon 09-Nov-09 13:24:54

OMG

your CM has gone to Disney world and not even told you when she was going to be back shock

no wonder you are cross!

surely the flights have been booked for ages and ages.

not sure what to suggest but you have every right to be very very cross. How unproffesional angry

(if you are near hampshire i am around this week and could help you out)

Fabster Mon 09-Nov-09 13:29:31

I feel if you let her get away with this, things will only get worse.

AboardtheAxiom Mon 09-Nov-09 13:30:53

That is terrible! I used to cm and wouldn't dream of doing this, as nannyl states, she is hardly up the road planning ad-hoc - her flights must have been booked in advance.

Dantthe4th's idea is a good one, if you call your local family inforation service ask for the number also for the childminding network in your area. Eash network usually has a vacancy co-ordinator, as well as that most offer a mentoring service to cms who are registering. Good luck in finding a new CM, hoep you get something sorted.

Fabster Mon 09-Nov-09 13:42:08

I would consider reporting her to OFSTED too, assuming she is registered.

4kidsandlovingit Mon 09-Nov-09 13:51:20

I am a CM and am totally shocked by what your CM has done. I have it in my contract that both I and parents give 4 weeks notice of holiday but allowa bit of flexability with the odd day at short notice.
As has been posted she knew well in advance when she would be going and coming back.
As for what you have already paid her, check your contract, she has certainly made herself unavailable to care for your child for this week (not holiday) so in effect could be in breach of her own contract.
I would`nt pay her anything for this week at least if I were you. Apart from holidays if she is not available she should not be paid. IMO. Get ourself another childminder who`s to say that she won`t do this to you again whether you speak to her or not.

atworknotworking Mon 09-Nov-09 13:59:09

Get a list from FIS at your local council, even if the minders show no vacancies call anyway, IME the lists are always so wrong its a joke. Have you had a look a bit further afield perhaps minders near where you or DH work, I pick up mindees from schools that arn't that local and have clients that travel a good 30-40mins to get to us.

I feel very angry for you btw, it's no way to treat someone and I can't figure out why she would contact some parents and not you, I hope she's sat next to MickyMouse feeling crappy for landing you in it.

Also ask around at the school most parents know who the CM's are and you can grab a couple <take some chockies or biscuits and you'll be well in>

atworknotworking Mon 09-Nov-09 14:03:01

Good point 4Kids if she made herself unavailable then she may well be in breach, extremely unprofessional in any event and I would imagine that if you did terminate without paying or giving notice she would be advised not to persue it anyway in view of her shoddy behaviour.

pleasechange Mon 09-Nov-09 14:22:42

That's awful - feel sad for you as that all must be so stressful when you have a new job as well

Have you considered a nursery?

AtheneNoctua Mon 09-Nov-09 14:30:57

I wouldn't go back to that childminder, and I wouldn't give her a penny that I wasn't contractually obligated to give her. (i.e. if she didn't give you the contractual notice she could forget the contractual pay)

edam Mon 09-Nov-09 14:38:28

What a cow!

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