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Biting

(9 Posts)
MUM2BLESS Sun 25-Oct-09 17:34:53

Does anyone mind a child who bites themsleves or other children? How do you deal with it.

Thanks

FantasticMissFox Sun 25-Oct-09 17:44:28

I personally would mind if they bit me or another child because it can really hurt sometimes. Not so worried if they bit themselves but would warn them off doing it. When my charge (who is 3 so should know better) bites I pull him away and sternly say YOU DO NOT BITE ME/WHOEVER. Depends what age the child in question is.

FantasticMissFox Sun 25-Oct-09 17:46:02

Just re-read your post do you mean mind as in look after? Sorry me being dumb!! In that case, then no, its not acceptable to bit any other children or you! HOw old is the child?

thebody Sun 25-Oct-09 19:36:05

totally not acceptable to bite anyone, child or cm and a bit strange to bite themselves.

I withdraw the child from the play, seriously gain eye contact and state'YOU WILL NOT BITE WHOEVER' then naughty step for a few minutes and totally ignore the biter, make lots of fuss of the bitten. Tell parents so all dealing with it the same way.

If happens again then longer away from the play action.

good luck.

MUM2BLESS Fri 30-Oct-09 20:51:51

Sorry should have mentioned that I mind a child who bites other children, myself and herself. I do not however accept this type of behaviour from this child. The child is almost two. I also have to deal with the child sometimes screaming when its time to sleep and also who she wants her own way.

I speak very firmly to the child and sometimes if necessary I put her in the buggy if I feel the behaviour is not right.

ficam Sat 31-Oct-09 14:44:06

Hello, I was a nanny to a child who was a terrible biter from a teething baby up to 5 years old!

It sounds like the child is behaving like this for attention and biting is very hard to ignore. For a child of this age any attention is good attention and when they bite it creates such a fuss that they are suddenly centre of attention.

The way I deal with it is to choose a place that will be where the child is put every time they bite like the stairs, a corner or on a particular cushion. Then when the child bites you stay calm and just say "we do not bite" and silently move them to that spot and completely ignore for a few minutes. It seems like they are getting away with it but it is the attention they are after. Also to go along with this make sure you heap on the praise and attention when they are being good. spend time playing and reading stories then as soon as any bite move away and ignore. You will have to really persevere and speak to the parents and get them involved.

As for the screaming and wanting own way its also attention and I wouldnt be suprised if this behaviour works at home and the child gets their way by behaving like this. Again its about sticking to the boundaries and rules in a calm consistent way and as hard as it is not rising to the attention seeking by getting wound up and reacting.

Good luck

pippin26 Sun 01-Nov-09 19:18:21

Many children bite due to overwhelming emotions they are experiencing - whether its love, dislike, fear etc. Some children are more tactile and like to experience things through their mouth (its a sensory thing after all!).
Some chilren do it out of frustration, tiredness, hunger.

None of this is consolation for the bitten though.

You need to find out the triggers for the biting. You need to come up with a plan of action with parents in agreement about how to deal with. If you can figure out the triggers then you can intervene with distraction and divert the biter.

Other things to try while you are figuring the triggers are - swift removal of the biter (to somewhere safe and in sight/sound) - TONS of lavished attention on the bitten - making a point of saying I know that hurts, its mad you sad/upset etc.

Brief explanation to the biter - biting hurts/makes people sad etc.

A firm, calm, consistent approach

Its a 'phase' that many children go through as I am sure you know.

NanaNina Mon 02-Nov-09 13:43:30

Agree with Pippin. Biting is just a phase and is no different really from pushing, throwing, pinching, whatever. People see it differently because it is more "animal" like but in reality it is just a normal developmental phase which the child will outgrow.

One of my sons was a bit of a biter at about aged 2, but quyickly grew out of it, and my dil has a close friend with a little girl who bites. The mother is tearing her hair our and all for no reason as this is just a phase like all others that will pass. I think the problem is in how it is perceived by others. Agree that it has to be dealt with in the way that Pippin suggests but I think adults need to guard against over reacting to this phase.

llllll Mon 02-Nov-09 16:53:50

My little boy has bit me and he bit my little girl last week. It seems to be when he is playing or when we cuddle him. He bit me on the boney part of my shoulder and it did hurt. I tell him off but he laughs when I tell him off. Has it got something to do with not being able to express themselves so they bit to get a reaction??? Sorry not much help.

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