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Would it be unfair of me to assume if a cm has a young child of their own...

(10 Posts)
HeadFairy Mon 21-Sep-09 21:26:50

then they're not going to be able to give as much attention to my ds (or indeed any of their mindees)? I've never had to find childcare on my own, I was very fortunate to have a friend do it before (but we've moved out of the area now) so I'm a bit at sea about how to decide which childminder to choose.

I really don't mind childminders having their own children at home at all... but do you think if they've got a pre-schooler then they'll put their child first/pay more attention to their child? Is that really unfair? I have no idea whether that's a totally unfair thing to think of a professional childminder. Can anyone enlighten me?

MaureenMLove Mon 21-Sep-09 21:30:00

Actually, it's quite the opposite! Well, I found anyway. When I had pre-schoolers and dd at home, I was always so concerned that I would be like that, I went the other way! Once she was older, the littlies came first again!

Good childminders love the kids whether they are theirs or minded.

You're worrying too much! smile

alwayslookingforanswers Mon 21-Sep-09 21:31:10

I'm not a childminder, but I know when I've looked after someone elses pre-schooler while having my own at home I've always left my poor child out in favour of looking after the friend's child blush

pippel Mon 21-Sep-09 21:32:06

my childminder has a ds the same age as my dd and she treats them exactly the same sometimes she puts dd first sometimes her ds it depends on the situation, exactly the same as if you have two children of similar ages of your own

HeadFairy Mon 21-Sep-09 21:33:04

That's what I was wondering... perhaps they over compensate and ignore (ok, not literally) their own children. But I really am clueless when it comes to choosing childminders. I just wondered if it was a good reason to discount someone...

LisaD1 Mon 21-Sep-09 21:33:11

Hello :-)

I'm a childminder and a mum of 2 girls, youngest is almost 2. I can't answer for all CM's, can only tell you how I am. I would have to say that my mindees absolutley do not play 2nd best to my own children and more often than not I will ask my own child to wait a minute while I do something with my mindees. I adore my mindees and there wll being and happiness is really important to me, they are treated with equal importance and effection as my own children during the day and I think you will find that any good chilminder feels the same.

Hope that helps.

I will also say, as with any form of childcare, you do need to look around and find someone you feel you can trust. There are some fantastic CM's around but there are also, sadly, some that I wouldn't leave my goldfish with, let alone my child!

HeadFairy Mon 21-Sep-09 21:35:57

I guess I'm worrying too much... that's probably what comes from being so lucky in having a ready made childminder from the get go!

Thanks everyone for your input... I won't automatically discount anyone who's got young children! It's a big help really, because that would have been an awful lot of childminders I'd have been discounting!

xoxcherylxox Mon 21-Sep-09 21:35:58

i am a childminder and the reason most ppl start childminding is because they have young children. i started childminding just after i feel pregnant then went bk to wrk 5 weeks after having we one at the stage my we one was just feeding then sleeping so the rest of the time was for the other children as she got bigger so did they others and could do more for themselfs. now my daughter is not the youngest to the we ones are put before her and she is the one that gets told to wait while im dealing with other children.

fishie Mon 21-Sep-09 21:40:09

headfairy i had a readymade cm too, mine had worked as a nanny pc. have you got any other worries? it has all been fantastic for me.

HeadFairy Mon 21-Sep-09 22:10:50

No other worries really Fishie, other than finding the perfect childminder, who charges almost nothing, is totally flexible, lives two minutes from my house and whom ds totally adores... not much to ask

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