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advice please, should i be sympathetic?

(14 Posts)
bradsmummy Fri 22-Apr-05 10:46:26

Hi all,
Ok here we go lol, Im a childminder register back end of last year, I have been having a few mild problems with a mindees family.
First week she was due to start she was ill they informed me she would not be coming for that first week i asked them to tell me when she would be coming next, the following weekend i rung them to find out, they said she wouldn't be coming the next day either would they have told me if i hadn't have rung? i thought. She started on the tuesday, on wednesday when they picked her up they said to me see you tomorrow ( contracted for mon,tues,wed ) i said that i was not booked for that day but that it would be ok and to ask me in future in advance.
Things seemed to be going great, till one week on a fri the grandmother turned up to drop the little one off, No warning! not been asked or booked i could not turn her away as its wasn't the g'mothers fault and she was due to goto work herself, luckily it didn't affect my numbers. They come to pick her up late with no valid reason, or not telling me too.
They have been good payers, about a month ago they asked me if they could pay me in a few weeks as thier tax credit were being reviewed and was not recieving anything from tax office, I agreed, the week before last i asked for a payment as i thought they are building up too much of a bill for themselves and also my dh will not be getting paid for a month as they are changing him from weekly pay to monthly, they said yeah sure we will bring money following week which was last week. mindee was ill for the beginning of the week and when she next came to me her mum told me she had received formal notice of redundancy but had been applying for other jobs beforehand. Then on monday of this week the mother told me her and husband had split up.

So my question is what do i do? Should i ask for a payment again or is this being unsympathetic, my hubby and i are just getting by till he gets his wage. I am sympathetic to their situation but from a business point of view she is 5/6 weeks behind payments. she pays weekly, in advance.

Sorry for going on and for my punctuation, not my best at english lol

bradsmummy xx

irishbird Fri 22-Apr-05 10:48:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BROWNY Fri 22-Apr-05 10:51:45

Hi Bradsmummy,

What a terrible situation to be in - poor you!! Of course, you must ask for payment again - you need to be paid - this is your job! It's not for you to be sympathetic to their problems, you've got your own worries!.

It sounds like you've been put on with these people and taken for granted. Do they still need you to mind their little one? I'd ask for payment each week if I were you. Best of Luck!!!!

uwila Fri 22-Apr-05 11:20:42

That's terrible. I think you should inform the mother that need payment next week. Accept the child when she comes, remind the mother of your NEED, then when next week ends if she doesn't have the money (in cash?), tell her that you are unable to accept the child the following week.

I appreciate this mother is probably having a hard time, but remember that it is not your responsibility to fix her personal life. And, you have a family of your own to support. It's sometime difficult to make these decisions and have to execute them. But, as a responsible business owner, you have every right to expect to be paid on time.

You also have every right to expect the child to show up only when you are contracted to look after him/her.

sallystrawberry Fri 22-Apr-05 11:26:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bradsmummy Fri 22-Apr-05 11:45:00

Thanks for the advice guys, I sort of knew i needed to ask for payment but i needed to hear it from the horses mouth (not calling you all horses lol!) to make sure i was doing the right thing, such a difficult situation iyswim.
Browny they are hoping to get another job in time so that they can keep the contract running.
I better go as i am due to start at twelve today, I will write a letter to the mother regarding payment as mindees g'parents drop and collect most of the time, in the letter i will notify her that i will be wanting to arrange a meeting to discuss arrangements again just make sure she understands things, i will explain that i need to know when she is coming well in advance for activities and days out etc. Fingers crossed it all works out.
Just had an enquiry for 8yr old twins! lmao.

ok better go and get dinner cooked in time for the mindee coming thanks again

bradsmummy xx

donnie Fri 22-Apr-05 15:13:13

definitely you need to put your foot down.....I agree it is a horrid situation and you are only human in being so sympathetic , BUT - this is your living !! you need to ask for the money.

Marina Fri 22-Apr-05 15:19:21

Agree. This is a sad situation for her but you need paying and have every right to press her for it. Bad luck

BROWNY Fri 22-Apr-05 18:02:39

Hope you get your cash soon Bradsmummy - have a good weekend

nicm Fri 22-Apr-05 18:06:36

hi bradsmummy

this probably isn't what you want to hear but i had this happen a while ago too. first i got given my 4 weeks notice that mindee was leaving as mum was leaving work, then i wasn't paid that week as wftc had been cut. this went on for a month...yes i was told i would get paid at end of month when they got paid, i thought fair enough. then mindee left. phoned loads of times and was told i would be paid, i'll drop the money in. after a month still nothing. then i was told i'd only get part of the money as mindee had left, but i said i was due full amount as in contract that i still got paid if i was working. sent a letter requesting payment still no reply. called them again to advise that i would have to take them to court if no payment recieved. ended up having to go to court to get what i was owed. payments were so small each week it ended up taking 7 months for me to be paid in full!! i don't think though some parents appreciate how hard the job is. had someone say to me what a brilliant job i had as i could just lie on the sofa all day as the kids are dropped off and picked up from the house . if only. the house would be falling down round me with a toddler on the loose hope you get this sorted soon. let me know how you get on.

feelingold Fri 22-Apr-05 18:50:38

When we do the contracts when taking on a new mindee I let parents decide if they want to pay me weekly or monthly and then I tell them (and fill it in on the contract) that if they are late paying me there will be an added charge of £5 and then another £1 per day after thatthey are late (never happened yet). I also write out an invoice a few days before their payment is due with the payment due date on it and that is it, no exceptions.
I know that this is a bit late regarding this particular parent but it may be something to think about in the future when taking on new mindees.

If you are a member of the NCMA I would give the helpline a call as they maybe able to give you some advice.
You are quite right to ask again for the money, if her employer turned round and said they were not paying her this month I think she would be a bit p**d off.
Good luck.

bradsmummy Fri 22-Apr-05 19:20:16

hi all,
I have wrote a letter regarding payment to the parents stating i want paying next week and have given it to the g'parent to handover, when we filled the contracts in she wanted to pay weekly, i stressed that i want it a week in advance. I also do invoices and hand them over at the end of each week so they can pay the beginning of the following week, in future i shall add a due date on the invoice. I thought a one off exception for late payment would be ok, but obviously has gone pear shaped and i certainly have learnt from my mistake and shall not be agreeing to one off late payments in the future, I am relatively new to this, i registered towards the end of last year and started minding only a few months ago, so still learning certain things of running your own business. As for the child, she is adorable and i am really enjoying childminding all the children in my care, definatley a right move for me from my previous job.

KatieMac Fri 22-Apr-05 19:25:22

Sorry your having problems Bradsmummy...good luck

bradsmummy Fri 22-Apr-05 19:27:06

thanks katiemac

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