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Help does my child prefer my childminder?

(11 Posts)
mojomands Wed 13-Apr-05 11:20:49

My child is now 13 months and has visited a childminder 3 days a week since she was 7 months. She loves it there and loves the childminder. My problem is picking her up - she screams in my arms and kicks to go back to the childminder. Does she prefer her to me -why does she do this it's upsetting and I've no control of her till we drive off back home - at which point she's fine!

mojomands Wed 13-Apr-05 11:21:52

My child is now 13 months and has visited a childminder 3 days a week since she was 7 months. She loves it there and loves the childminder. My problem is picking her up - she screams in my arms and kicks to go back to the childminder. Does she prefer her to me -why does she do this it's upsetting and I've no control of her till we drive off back home - at which point she's fine!

Mothernature Wed 13-Apr-05 11:26:27

No - I was a childminder and all of mine did the same, one would even slap his parents if they came down to his level, they are very good a guilt trips even at that young age, they are just having a good time and dont see why they should be taken away from something they are enjoying doing...HTH

Bugsy2 Wed 13-Apr-05 11:29:29

No, of course she doesn't!!!! She is just exercising her power. Don't let it rattle you - it is only a phase. Both mine have done this at various stages & tbh, I just felt relieved because it was an indication of how happy they were at the childminders.

mojomands Wed 13-Apr-05 12:15:15

Thanks for that - I am thankful she's happy there but did start to wonder whether I wasn't doing enough with her during her time with me. I didn't realise a child could have such a strong personality at such an early age (should have expected it with two headstrong parents!).

feelingold Wed 13-Apr-05 13:25:20

The little boy I mind is 2 and he is always pleased to see his mum but when it's time to get his coat on he hides behind the sofa.
Also while he is with me I have one other child but they get my full attention, I don't have to hoover or get jobs done like you have to do as a parent at home with kids. He is also an only child so i think he likes having someone else to play with cos he's on his own at home. Just my opinion though.

mojomands Wed 13-Apr-05 14:31:22

That makes sense - my little girl still isn't mobile so I am able to get on with things leaving her to her own devices quite often. She too is an only child - better hurry up and have another one eh!

uwila Wed 13-Apr-05 15:16:36

My DD dis this too when she was around this age. I figured it was due to the childminder having a lot more toys and kids to play with. DD loved it there. And in the end I decided that if she was unhappy about leaving that meant she was happy all day. So, while I completely appreciate how you must feel (and I didn't like it much either) I knew deep down that what really mattered was DD's happiness, not mine.

So I took comfort in know she like her childminder. And just figured my ego was my problem -- it certainly was harming her.

mojomands Wed 13-Apr-05 15:27:39

Uwila

Just so I know - how old was she whenshe grew out of this. Also I'm new to this website - what an earth does DD mean?

uwila Wed 13-Apr-05 15:49:20

DD- Dear Daughter
DS- Dear Son
DH- Dear Husband
DP- Deap Partner
and so on...

I'm afraid I won't be a huge help regarding when she outgrew it because when she was about 15 months old we got a nanny and so it wasn't an issue any more.

chipmonkey Wed 13-Apr-05 16:10:25

mojomands, click on "acronym list" at the top. it'll give you all the abbreviations.

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