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How long did it take for your lo to get used a nanny/cm?

(12 Posts)
peanutbutterjelly Sat 04-Oct-08 22:27:00

Hi all mums out there that use a nanny/cm. How long did it take for your lo's to get used a nanny/cm? Did you spend hours/days with the cm/nanny to see how they looked after your lo? what's the going rate for a nanny per hour? did it take time getting used to having a nanny in your house.. did you wonder what the nanny did while your child slept?

SimpleAsABC Sun 05-Oct-08 11:52:19

I looked after a 4 and 5 y.o, as nanny for six months.

Worked pt term time and ft holidays. As I started term time and was only seeing one child 9 hours per week and their sibling 3, I'd say when I left after six months, the children STILL weren't entirely settled.

This is a major part of the reason I wouldn't take on a position like this again.

dooodle Sun 05-Oct-08 15:01:25

I have worked as a nanny for 13 yrs and it takes about 3 weeks to settle in. A nanny normally does chores and takes a well eared break.

dooodle Sun 05-Oct-08 15:02:05

I have worked as a nanny for 13 yrs and it takes about 3 weeks to settle in. A nanny normally does chores and takes a well earned break.

KatyMac Sun 05-Oct-08 15:04:21

As a childminder - I create an individual plan for settling in dependant upon the childs age & stage of development, how the parents feel about leaving the lo & the other children I have present

It can involve several weeks of slow build up - for a new mum with a tiny baby to a 20 minute visit for a 7yo

I don't charge for settling in as long as you can fit in with me

HTH

nannynick Sun 05-Oct-08 17:21:35

As a nanny, I will respond to your questions peanutbutterjelly.

>How long did it take for your lo's to get used a nanny/cm?

It can vary from child to child. I find that the younger they are, the easier it is. 3-4 year olds can take quite some time to get used to someone else... or rather, it's more a case of getting used to not having a parent around at their beck and call all the time. Babies are far more adaptable.
With any change, always give it at least two weeks (or 10 nanny working days). Once that period is over, things I find tend to settle down and everyone is much happier about the situation.

>Did you spend hours/days with the cm/nanny to see how they looked after your lo?

No I've never had a parent do that. I prefer being dropped in the deep end as it were. What I do is meet the family a few times (for an hour or so each meeting) so that the children get to know my face.

>what's the going rate for a nanny per hour?
Varies around the country. Typically I'd say it is in the region of £6 to £12 Gross per hour. This is for Live-Out. Live-In could be less, but not always.

>did it take time getting used to having a nanny in your house.

Can't answer that one... but it takes me time as a nanny to get used to the house, where things are, a child's particular likes/dislikes etc.

>did you wonder what the nanny did while your child slept?

Your child sleeps? During the day?
I don't find that children often sleep during the day. Even with babies, they seem to cat-nap a bit while travelling (in buggy, in car). Sometimes a baby will sleep for a couple of hours in the afternoon, but I find they tend to do so when under the weather. If a long nap is part of your child's current routine... then it may still happen when in the care of a nanny/cm... but it may not. Be prepared for there being some changes to your child's routine.

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 05-Oct-08 17:29:44

older children sometimes may find it harder to have new nanny but thankfully all my charges babies and older have taken to me striaght away

i usually start job and parents go to work from 1st day - but i would have met/pklayed with them maybe a few times before i started job

wages vary on area and age and experience

if a live out nanny, and parents work,then gen not a problem having a nanny in house, though may find things not always in same place

i personally make it clear to parents that when child is asleep, that as long as duties are done (if have any - i dont do any nursery duties) then the time is my own to have lunch, watch tv , go on internet, read etc

all parents i have worked for have been happy with me doing this

cmx2 Sun 05-Oct-08 17:56:36

from a cm's point of view it depends on

1)how many days per week the child is with me (ie a child here 5 days will settle quicker than one here 1 or 2 days a week),

2)how old the child is the younger the better usually, although now parents have 8 or 9 months at home on maternity leave it is making things difficult because at around that age most babies go through a clingy stage anyway which doesnt help them settle into any new routine,

3)how the parents are about leaving their child, some find it very hard to leave the child even when they have been using childcare for many months or more. it is best on most occasions to make the goodbye short and sweet dont drag it out, its worse for the parent the child and the carer.

i would say you know within a month whether the child is settled and happy even if they do still cry a little as the parent leaves.

hth

woodstock3 Mon 06-Oct-08 15:27:56

we have had a nanny since ds was eight months old. he settled pretty much instantly - we had a few half days before i went back so they could get to know each other and i'd recommend this.
i think the first time she came for an hour or two and played with him but i was always in the house; the second time i went out for a couple of hours and left them to it; the third time was a half day. then i went back to work ft. she warned me to expect a bit of clinging and/or howling when i left in the mornings at first but tbh he's never really done this - occasionally there is a bit of mild protesting if he's feeling under the weather eg teething -usually he's thrilled to see her when she arrives in the morning. he was however a very sociable baby who's always liked new people and a shyer child might have more trouble.
from friends who have CMs etc seems it may be quicker settling with a nanny because there is less to get used to - baby is still in its own home rather than a new house, etc, and can more easily stick to its old routine.
you getting used to the nanny - i didnt find this a problem at all: if she's live in, though, it might be hard never having the house to yourself. with some nannies it will take a while to find the right boundaries as it is an odd relationship - you are the boss and they are the employee, but it's a more intimate relationsihp than in an office because they are in your home and they're looking after the most precious thing in your world.
as for what happens when he's asleep, he still sleeps for up to 2 hours in the middle of the day and i told her from the beginning that she could do what she liked while he was napping. frankly if you are doing the job properly while the baby's awake, you'll be knackered enough by the time they go to sleep that you'll want to sit down with the paper and a cup of tea - it's what i do and i wouldn't expect my nanny to do anything i don't expect of myself.
usual practice is for a nanny to use nap time to ensure any child-related chores are done, like deal with their laundry or sort out toys or clean up the kitchen after lunch, and then after that it's up to them.

elkiedee Mon 06-Oct-08 16:52:20

I took ds to the childminders two or three times with me to meet her and then to go back and talk some more about stuff and then to sign forms. Then I left him twice but only for a couple of hours. Then I went back to work full time, he cried the first two days and on the third day it was a much more token wail, it didn't even last until I was out of earshot. After that he was fine, so less than a week! Now he's happy to get there and only cries sometimes when leaving.

snickersnack Mon 06-Oct-08 19:43:05

How long did it take for your lo's to get used a nanny/cm?

About a week, I think, but they were quite small

Did you spend hours/days with the cm/nanny to see how they looked after your lo?

Not really - she spent an afternoon with us before I recruited her, then I was around the first day, then not really after that.

what's the going rate for a nanny per hour?

We pay £90 a day net for a 10.5 hour day. Can't do the maths, my head hurts

did it take time getting used to having a nanny in your house?

Not really, though she doesn't live in, so maybe a bit different. I do still have to make an effort to tidy up a bit before bed - don't want her stepping over my dirty clothes in the bathroom.

did you wonder what the nanny did while your child slept?

I assume she puts her feet up. 10.5 hours is a long day without a break. She tidies the children's rooms while ds sleeps, does some washing and gets lunch ready, but I think when that's done she checks her email, watches tv, has a coffee. Whatever - I wouldn't expect her to work, it's her choice to do the chores while he sleeps.

Blondeshavemorefun Tue 07-Oct-08 13:27:23

woodstock and snickersnack - glad you dont mind your nanny relaxing when charges are asleep

some of my friends employers do object shock

as you say its a long day and with no actual real lunch hour,us nannies LOVE when charges sleep

as long as chores are done(if any) then i dont see the problem in nanny sitting on her arse/watching tv etc

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