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CM Club: What would you do/suggest?

(18 Posts)
PinkChick Wed 06-Aug-08 14:42:08

mindee almost 4 refused to eat any lunch(was treat lunch as well, took them out to nice cafe ofter play session)..he chose it, he has eaten it before, just wouldnt eat it and messed about, never even picked it up.

So its almost snack time and ive bought nice ginger bread men, i really dont think he should have one after creating so much, should i offer him just fruit? things like this are a treat so i dont want him thinking he can be like this and get away with it..the same child has also just spent 30 minutes in the hall, wouldnt take his coat or shoes off, so wouldnt/couldnt(cos of shoes) come in play room and sat on stairs with pet liphmm...he was asked if he neeed help and i was ignored??? at a loss with this one!..hes not even showing signs he is hungry so should i juts wait till mum arrives (in about an hour)???

MaureenMLove Wed 06-Aug-08 14:54:27

Hmm. Tricky one. Is he the only one you've got today? Thing is, if you don't let him have it, and others do, its kinda like you're being mean to him. Is it possible to delay snack time until mum gets there and pass the buck?grin

How about a sandwich or something? And maybe explain why he's not getting a treat?

PinkChick Wed 06-Aug-08 15:08:11

hi mo, theres dd, mindee girl 5, this mindee 3 and baby mindee, all of whom ate ALL their lunch and are now(barring the baby) asking for something to eat, said mindee has not asked and is sat playing????

moshie Wed 06-Aug-08 15:13:05

I'd give everyone fruit now, and the gingerbread men when he's gone.

PinkChick Wed 06-Aug-08 15:14:35

righto, will have to suffer glares from dd and mindee tho nowsmilewink

SammyK Wed 06-Aug-08 15:28:31

Can you delay them until after tea time? Or will all the same kids be there? Or let mindee who ate lunch take one home and your dd have one for her supper?

I wouln't give to everyone but one if you feel unsure enough to ask on here. I would mention behaviour to mum on pick up though, maybe he is just having a tired day, ds similar age and is often like this.

southernbelle77 Wed 06-Aug-08 15:38:12

I think I must be really mean then as I personally would let the others have it and give that mindee fruit. I have mindee who does similar things and have done the same. Maybe it's not fair but imo it is not fair on the others who have been well behaved. You are rewarding the well behaved ones for being good. <mindee might then be good in future.
Seems like it's just me tho! blush

KatyMac Wed 06-Aug-08 15:43:55

Difficult as fruit shouldn't be seen as a punishment tho' should it?

MrsFluffleHasAWuffle Wed 06-Aug-08 15:52:22

Neither should withholding food though wink

I'd pop them in the mindees bags to take home and give a slightly less appealing snack to them all.

SammyK Wed 06-Aug-08 17:12:33

I would do the same as you with an older child SB but not with a 3 yr old.

I don't do puds daily as I am an adult that craves sweet food after a meal as I had the clear your plate for pudding upbringing, and want to avoid ds learning the same link.

If kids don't eat their tea then say they are hungry I offere them the fruit bowl and explain as they haven't had a full balanced meal, then fruit will help keep their bodies healthy. IME it is the kids that leave there meal that ask for junk.

SB in future I would keep treats secret if possible to avoid the headache. grin I know it's not always possible though - I have one that goes through my cupboards!

Shoshe Wed 06-Aug-08 17:28:42

Nope Belle your not alone, I would do the same thing, maybe I'm old fashioned, but if you dont eat your dinner (or at least a go at it) you dont get the treat.

southernbelle77 Wed 06-Aug-08 17:42:55

The problem I find is when they will not even try their main meal. If they tried and didn't like it then fair enough, but to just blatanly sit there and point blank refuse is very annoying!

If they all know that if they eat (even if not all) the main part of the meal, they can then have something else, it is up to them to decide!

jillyj Wed 06-Aug-08 17:46:10

do you discuss this sort of thing with parents, prob best to see what they think/agree with.

southernbelle77 Wed 06-Aug-08 17:49:40

I always talk about it with parents and they have asked that if they don't eat their dinner, not to give them other things so I guess it makes it easier as they have said it!

imananny Wed 06-Aug-08 19:29:20

if they dont eat their meal, then no treat afterwards and then nothing till next meal

if my 3yr old complains he is hungary, then I just say tough and he should of eaten breakie/lunch etc

My mb follows the same rules and sometimes as I have got into work, and she says 3yr mucked about with breakfast and was put in bin, therefore nothing til lunch - and I will totally support her, just as she would support me

went out for picnic today and charge didnt want his sandwich, so ate his fruit but didnt have ice cream when other 5 children did, but he knew that and respects me, and told mb later tonight he didnt get one as he didnt eat his sandwich

in your case pink chick, will the mum support you,or will she just give sweets&biscuits when child gets home as some of my other bosses have done - grrrrr

PinkChick Wed 06-Aug-08 19:50:13

Hi All, have just finished early, was supposed to be working till8pm tonight, so couldnt give mindee hers to take home after letting them buy them as it woud be too late..i cut up a load of different fruit and shared it betweent hem all, mindee wolfed his down (not surprising really!) and when he left, i gave the girls their meal and they had treat afterwards.
Funnily enough dd said she would actually rpefer more fruitsmile!

Mum has mentioned to me in past about her not being happy about him eating lots of sweet stuff, esp before meals, but i KNOW this actually isnt the case as ive seen and heard(from mum-she slipped up) what he eats for breakfast, or they will call to shop on way home as mindee DEMANDS choc, sweets etchmm

we dont do treats that often..lunch out today was a 'treat' i try not to make choc/sweets the only 'treat'..we have yogurts, sugar free jelly or fruit

anyway, another day over, got 5 all day tomorrowhmm...if it rains again im sure ill need help somewere along line againsmilewink..thanks everyonesmile

PinkChick Wed 06-Aug-08 19:51:42

also, i would do that with dd, if she winges and moans through meal about not liking this that and the other or wont eat a lot, she gets nothing till next meal..dp cracks, but i wont..cant always do that with someone elses though, or rather you can but have to be more tactfulsmile

RachieB Wed 06-Aug-08 20:11:35

i would have given to the others, but not the 3 yr old

i must be a nasty nanny too lol grin

MB is happy with this tactic
my charge knows that if she doesnt eat her main meal, or messes about with it
she wont be getting xyz afterwards,but her brother and sisters will

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