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Helping hands at a 16th party

(29 Posts)
NotQuiteDepp Thu 31-Jan-19 14:51:56

So, as you can see I am not a regular poster on here, and I don't know if this is the right place to post this one, but here goes. Ne gentle with me.
A friend of mine lives overseas, but her DD is boarding at a college in London, studying for her GCSEs. Her 16th is coming up this weekend and my friend has arranged a party on a boat on Saturday. My friend asked me to help out because she can't fly over for this (so many brownie points for doing this), but between us we're struggling to find some more adults to help me keep an eye on the party. She's tried looking up a chaperone company but they didn't have anyone London based and didn't seem too competent when they were discussing the requirement so she's held off.

So Hive Mind - other than me suddenly finding more friends in London who can help me, does anyone know any agencies or places I could hire a responsible adult or 3 to help (no smutty jokes please - I am way ahead of you on that one already).

I should add - she asked me because I am taking my DD to the party as well.

OP’s posts: |
Etino Thu 31-Jan-19 14:54:02


Jakethekid Thu 31-Jan-19 14:55:31

Couldn't a security company be of assistance?

FanSpamTastic Thu 31-Jan-19 14:56:38

Is this to stop gatecrashers etc - if so then maybe try a security company?

Etino Thu 31-Jan-19 14:57:03

Sorry. That wasn’t helpful but seriously. Yikes! That’s a big ask!
Can you contact the college and ask for their recommendations? They might have staff or more likely friends or colleagues of staff who would do it.
Or do you have any teacher friends who could ask around or do it?

1busybee Thu 31-Jan-19 14:59:54

Contact the boat people. If they hire out for parties then they’ll have contacts for that sort of thing. Sounds like you’re an amazing friend!!! Good luck

O4FS Thu 31-Jan-19 15:04:04

Will the guests be drinking?

spugzbunny Thu 31-Jan-19 15:05:58

Yeh you need a bouncer. I remember many years ago people hiring bouncers for parties at that age. Contact a security company and ask if they have anyone.

Alternatively you could possibly look at a babysitting service but at 16 they will be behaving like adults and bouncers have more experience with that sort of behaviour.

yakari Thu 31-Jan-19 15:07:17

Wow, I live overseas where hiring a junk is a sort of norm, but there is no way I'd do the same in the uk for a 16th and then ask a friend to babysit. Sorry, thats massively CF territory. So my first thought was tell her to rearrange til she can get over.

However if you are ok to go along, rope in friends. You need people who won't over react but equally will keep an eye - do any of the other invitees gave parents you know? That would be my first call.

TeeBee Thu 31-Jan-19 15:12:19

If you are hiring security make sure you hire someone who comes personally recommended. you really don't one who likes to play the heavy. You need someone who is used to working with teenagers and who knows how to keep things light. If you don't know anyone, I would talk to the doormen on the local nightclubs and ask who they work for, and then maybe go through them.

NotQuiteDepp Thu 31-Jan-19 15:14:23

The boat will be sailing on the Thames for the whole of the party so unless we come across a raiding party from a pirate ship I think we should be safe from gatecrashers.
It's more about making sure there is a decent adult to kid ratio. Alcohol free bar too, so I'll keep an eye out for kids trying to sneak a cheeky vodka in.

OP’s posts: |
Somethingsmellsnice Thu 31-Jan-19 15:16:31

They will sneak vodka etc in in water bottles, coke bottles etc. I suggest any drinks of any kind will be left on dry land or the person will not be admitted!

whoever thought teenagers on a boat was a good idea!?

NotQuiteDepp Thu 31-Jan-19 15:20:34

I am slightly scared by it I have to say

OP’s posts: |
O4FS Thu 31-Jan-19 15:32:56

It won’t be a cheeky vodka. They will disguise it 80% vodka, 20% Vimto in a Vimto bottle.

You could do bag searches and pat them down upon boarding.

I was shocked by how much alcohol 16 year olds could get their hands on. I was deluded ‘oh they’ll swipe a can or two from their parents fridge’.

I got though many, many, washing up bowls and buckets that night. Most of the garden furniture went to the dump the next day, along with a vomity armchair. I had to hacksaw the remainder of the toilet seat off and replace it.

On dry land was bad enough, but on a boat? 😭

I’m guessing that as she’s at boarding college there are no parents of her friends around to help?

Pomegranatemolasses Thu 31-Jan-19 15:41:20

I think that's a huge ask, namely because of the alcohol factor. There will be a large cohort drinking, and at that age they have no sense.

You are being asked to take responsibility for the well being of a group of teenagers - what happens when someone drinks too much/becomes ill etc etc. Also casual drug taking is fairly rampant, including coke and MDMA. The whole idea is an absolute minefield.

TeeBee Thu 31-Jan-19 15:49:02

Actually, how many guests would there be? A venue has a legal obligation to provide doormen when there are over a certain number of people, so the responsibility may fall to them.

happyasasandboy Thu 31-Jan-19 15:49:11

I am amazed a party boat hire in London has taken a booking for a 16th party without confirming the supervision aspect shock When I hire our local hall for any function I have to give a named responsible adult for every 15 guests!

I would explain to the mum that's asked you this "favour" that you can't supervise a boatful of drunk 16 year olds on your own, and that you don't know anyone to ask to help you. It is her problem to source some proper supervision. By all means be the point of contact for the party to make decisions on the day, but I don't think one person, who doesn't know the kids, can supervise this adequately.

They will arrive half drunk and smuggle large amounts of spirits in. They just will.

NotQuiteDepp Thu 31-Jan-19 16:25:07

Good news - think we may have found a chaperone agency with DBS checks.

OP’s posts: |
Aftershock15 Thu 31-Jan-19 17:16:40

Glad you have found helpers. Couple of logistical suggestions.

Have a room or cupboard where all bags/coats/party gifts will go. Once everyone on board, lock this area until they depart the boat. This will at least limit the amount of booze they can access during the party.

Make it be know that no one will allowed to board the boat if they are drunk. Unless they are being bused from school I imagine they will preload somewhere.

Insist on emergency contact numbers for all people attending. It might be the school but you need someone you can call.

Good luck!

anniehm Thu 31-Jan-19 17:21:14

Try the student unions in the area or unitemps - they may be able to advertise for dbs checked adults (this is essential as are under 18's) also I suggest you clarify the id ruleson the boat as these are private school kids mostly who will probably have access to fake id (everyone at my DD's boarding school seems to have it apart from her, so she says at least). Otherwise you could try care agencies who have babysitters - ok different age group but a nice earner for a university student.

anniehm Thu 31-Jan-19 17:22:38

Ps we did this as teens and the law wasn't as strict cue lots of throwing up overboard but great fun!

HSMMaCM Thu 31-Jan-19 17:24:56

One of DD's friends used to sneak in vodka in her bra, down her trousers and all sorts. They can be very resourceful, so be careful.

Dyrne Thu 31-Jan-19 17:27:17

Wow, you’re a brave one, OP!

Prepare for at least one of them to have a falling out with their friends and start screeching that they want to get off the boat RIGHT NOW!!! grin

O4FS Thu 31-Jan-19 17:39:04

I’m wondering if I can use the chaperone company for DS2s 16th party 🤔

titchy Thu 31-Jan-19 17:43:49

Jesus that's risky. Hugely risky. Your friend is stupid frankly and a cf Hope we don't see it on the news.

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