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Putting myself first and bit feeling guilty

(5 Posts)
GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Tue 17-Jul-18 11:46:35

I’ve been totally screwed over recently by several families. Not all of them at fault, just a change of circumstances meaning not full notice given, another leaving to go to another cm because she’s cheaper etc. A different mun shouted at me on the doorstep last week because I said No to a request too.

I’ve been umming and ahhing over taken one extra day’s holiday this summer and have just decided I’m just going to go for it. Families don’t give us a second thought when doing what’s best for them, so I’m going to be a bit more selfish and start thinking of me and mine first for once.

Anyone else reached this stage?

OP’s posts: |
1CantPickAName Tue 17-Jul-18 12:23:41

Yes I feel very much like that at the moment.

I had a family who I charged 100% for their time off and nothing when I took time off. Dad took his holidays to play golf and mum took her holidays to shop and bake, fair enough & none of my business. Until I wanted to book some holiday.... my dad had died the previous year so my two brothers, my sister, me and our kids booked to go visit her for (she lives abroad). When I gave the family my holiday letter and 6 weeks notice (contractually I only needed to give 4 weeks notice), I got a mouthful of abuse from both of them on seperate occasions, along the lines of “what are we supposed to do, we have no annual leave left”!!!

The dad never spoke to me again, despite the fact he had to collect his dd from me 4 days a week. I took my holiday and gave them notice, u had their child for over 3 years.

GeorgieTheGorgeousGoat Tue 17-Jul-18 12:47:12

That’s it isn’t it? Take take take.

I’ve been ill twice this year and taken no time off, I know how important it is for parents to be able to go to work.

They don’t appreciate it though, still get abuse when you do something they don’t like.

I have to say, most of my parents are fab, but the few who aren’t spoil it for everyone because it makes you stop offering favours for example.

OP’s posts: |
Maryann1975 Tue 17-Jul-18 13:46:32

Icantpickaname, I’ve had that situation before, where a parent has taken so many days off so she can have a break, that she had no days left to cover my (pre booked-lots of notice given) holiday. She always made out it was my fault and I could hardly mention that most parents like to spend a little bit of time with their children when they have annual leave over the year. They were the kind of parents that you wonder why they had a child tbh.
Finding cover for my holidays is not my problem, I offer to give them a number for an alternative minder if they need it, but I give my holiday dates out for the whole year before Christmas and will be giving next years main holiday dates out before the end of August, so plenty of time for them to arrange their own holidays around mine.

1CantPickAName Thu 19-Jul-18 22:02:15

@Maryann1975, I know what you mean.
I understand that parents need a break from work and their kids. I booked my dd in with another childminder one day a week when I needed a break for a while. But I do wonder what goes through people’s heads when you give a family your holiday schedule so far in advance and they still use up all there annual leave from work without taking into consideration what they are going to do when their childminder needs a holiday?!?!

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