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Should I just quit?

(7 Posts)
Salmonpink Sat 15-Mar-14 21:58:26

Hi !
I am looking for some advice about the 'nanny' job I'm so if at the moment.
I use the term 'nanny' loosely as I had never advertised myself as such - on the childcare website I was simply looking for the odd evening babysitting. However, I had just come back after being an au pair in France (for a lovely family) , having had sole charge care of 7 year old and 12 year old girls. Long days in school holidays (12hrs+) and youngest are at home during lunch time so hours were 8am-school drop off, 11.45-1.30 lunch at home, 4.30pm-8pmish, plus full day on Wednesdays (no school) So wasn't completely clueless.

This job is with 3 kids 11yo, 7yo and 5yo. It started in the summer school holidays, which was perfect timing for me as had just come back from au pairing and needed a job until my Uni course started. In the interview with the parents, I explained that I was not a nanny, that I had had sole charge care with my au pair family, but that I had had a lot of guidance and was seen as a big sister more than nanny (ie. they didn't take the pee!)
The parents of this new family were fine with this. They were however put out that I was not prepared to drive their children, even after I explained that I had just passed my driving test and there was no way that I would feel confident enough. I live in the same village as them and everything is 10-15 mins away on foot so it's hardly like we were going to be housebound! They told me that they would pay me £6/hr if I wasn't going to have the car as we would need money for buses etc. I agreed naively but now understand that to be really low wage. School holidays were hell. Parents barely even said hello to me in the morning, left me their mess to tidy up, complained about the way I stacked the dishwasher... Would come back from work late everyday, then proceed to get changed/make a phone call before letting me go home. Also seemed to take offence whenever I asked their kids to do something (eg. C'mon guys lets go upstairs and get dressed!'), wanted to vet everything I did with them ('oh, you're going on a picnic, why didn't you say...') worst thing was no kitty money whatsoever materialised even after we'd agreed it beforehand, so for whole school hols either I had to buy ice creams etc or we just ended up with 3 kids crying... The mother was there all day long, apart from the odd hour or so when she went to a meeting. None of this was told at the interview. Also later found out that 5yo boy had a medical condition and needed me to administer daily medicine (again not told about beforehand).
I was offered the job as an after school nanny after the summer hols but declined, saying I would be too busy with uni work. Have since had to delay uni start date due to a family bereavement. The mum knew this and offered me an ad hoc childcare job (I already have part time job) for hrs that the childminder couldn't cover/kids sickness etc. I agreed and since December I have done around 35 days for them plus all feb and October school holidays and some Xmas holidays. Am getting increasingly unhappy though. Mother very critical of me, low pay, NO money to do things with kids. Each time I bring up the kitty money, she treats me like a young child and says very sternly 'we WILL give you some money, but when it's gone, it's GONE!' Also, I have, now I'm a more confident driver, occasionally driven the kids from school to their house but the mum won't pay any mileage as their school is halfway between my house and theirs so 'I would have had do the journey anyway'.
Her constant criticism is driving me insane and leaving me on the edge all the time. I do really like the kids and when it's just us everyone is happy, calm and kids have a good time!
AIBU? Did I unwillingly get myself into a nanny job for which I was not prepared? If so, are all nanny jobs like this ?! Should I quit, if so, how?!

JokersGiggle Sat 15-Mar-14 22:42:57

Did you sign something stating a notice period? If not then just say your no longer available, and make sure your mum doesn't offer you again.
Nanny jobs can be great with the right family. its like match making, you need to fit together.
Good luck in the future x

JokersGiggle Sun 16-Mar-14 09:13:01

Also its a very low wage - I earn over double what you do x

Emubaby Sun 16-Mar-14 10:22:50

Not all jobs are like this. The parents are being very unreasonable and the wage is extremely low. Do you have a contract? If not you have no legal ties to them. Don't do it anymore. If you want to do ad hoc nannying there are plenty of jobs around.

Marylou62 Sun 16-Mar-14 14:56:29

OP, if you dont have a contract (which I doubt you do) then just leave. After next pay day, just leave. If you want to do it properly you could write a letter and give it to her...but I suspect she/they will get nasty...If I was you, I would just text that something else has come up and you are unavailable. You sound nice and caring but you dont have to put up with this. Please....they are walking all over you and you are allowing it. No not all Nanny jobs are like this and I have been a nanny/CM for over 30 years. Is childcare something you plan to do in the future?

ZuleikaD Sun 16-Mar-14 19:33:26

Yeah, this sounds awful - tell them to take a hike. If you were a proper nanny you'd have a proper contract and they'd have to pay you more (and would probably respect you more as well).

RandomMess Sun 16-Mar-14 19:44:26

They sound horrendous £6 per hour for looking after 3c!

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