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Advice needed

(4 Posts)
mammasmadhouse Fri 28-Feb-14 19:00:59

Dear All

I need the benefit of your experience and advice!!
My 8 year old goes to a child-minder before and some nights after school, however she has been having problems with a child our child-minder also looks after (who is also our child-minders nephew). The problems have ranged from not sharing/general spitefulness/saying that dd has done xyz and she hasn't- my dd has also had problems at school and has been pulled about/smacked. I am sure on some occasions with the minor issues my dd is perhaps being a bit sensitive but it does worry me, plus the guilt of my working full time and putting my dd in this position. Last year dd was in the same class as this child but did not then go to the child-minders, this year they are in different classes. I have asked my dd whether she would like to go to breakfast club and she has said that she does like going to the child-minders but just not when this child is being mean. The child has been made to apologise and has even apologised to me but today we have had 2 incidents so can anyone offer any words of wisdom on how to deal with this going forward. Thank you in advance xxx

Sourpickles Fri 28-Feb-14 19:35:09

I would sit down with the childminder and really voice your concerns and ask her what she can/plans to do to really help. Forcing an apology will do nothing.

HSMMaCM Fri 28-Feb-14 19:42:13

I was going to suggest moving her, but I can see you said she's happy to stay. Just have a chat to the CM about how she's feeling.

mammasmadhouse Wed 26-Mar-14 20:13:07

Had a chat with CM and things seem better between my dd and the other child, but my dd has been keeping her distance from him at school. I may be just over sensitive now but I do feel quite awkward about discussing anything with cm.
I guess the guilt I feel for putting my dd in this position doesn't help so i need an impartial view please.It seems that after school the kids at the Child-minders all play fight with guns and swords sometimes my dd will get involved sometimes she doesn't want to, either way she tends to get hit somewhere along the line. Last week she got hit in the eye with a guitar (got a bit of shiner) another time she got knocked over and hurt her arm.
We have been looking at how we can make things better for dd and decided that we would pick up her from school and not have her go to the CM. I forgot to speak to the CM about it today but my dd mentioned it and our CM asked why, my dd said because she keeps getting hurt, to which CM said oh you get hurt sitting on the sofa or chair do you..? When dd mentioned it I was a bit taken back and I am not sure how to tackle this without saying something I will regret... so please offer me your words of wisdom!!

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