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Is my childminder settling in plan going to work?

(8 Posts)
flowerlady46 Mon 24-Feb-14 19:58:14


I posted this at the bottom of someone else's thread earlier today but had no response so I'm starting a new one. Apologies if you've already read it.

I'm going back to work after Easter and my 10 month old son will be going to a brilliant childminder. However, although she has looked after her own children for many years she is quite newly registered (just under two years) and I think my son will be the youngest child (apart from her own) that she has taken on. Consequently I'm concerned that we may not have made the best settling in plans which are as follows.

Due to her circumstances and my choice we've decided to do an extended settling in which is starting next week with three 2 hour sessions. The following week he will go to her for one full day and will continue to go to her for one full day every week until after Easter (about 7 weeks worth). I will be looking after him for the other days. After Easter (when I go back to work) it will increase to 3 days per week. At the end of June it will finally increase to four days per week.

My question is: Is the one full day per week really settling in or am I just making it more difficult for all of us as each time he goes back to her it will feel unfamiliar. Do babies this young forget people and situations in a week? Two half days would be trickier for me but if it would help him settle then I'll make it work

I'm particularly concerned because in the last month or so he's become really clingy and can sometimes become inconsolable when I leave him with other people - usually his grandparents. I know that there's nothing really wrong and mainly I feel sorry for the adult having to put up with his crying but I'd like to know that when he's with the childminder he doesn't cry ALL the time.

Any thoughts or advice v gratefully received.

JabberJabberJay Mon 24-Feb-14 20:04:57

Once he is familiar with the childminder, I would have him there for at least 2 days a week. If he is only there one day a week then there is less of a routine for him and chance for him to forget the childminder.

My DD is 2 and recently started nursery. She had 3 settling in sessions. The first time I stayed the whole time, the second I stayed for a while before leaving and the third I handed her over and left immediately. Thereafter she did 3 days a week. She's been absolutely fine, has settled brilliantly and loves it. She was quite a clingy child so I was a bit concerned.

I think your plan is drawing the process out unnecessarily TBH.

Minnieisthedevilmouse Mon 24-Feb-14 20:07:40

Our nursery was quite clear one day a week wasn't enough as they forget or worse remember and get worked up. Could you do a couple of half days? If not after your initial few hours I'd just go for it.

Unsure about cms but imagine it's similar....

TwittyMcTwitterson Mon 24-Feb-14 21:13:00

I was also told half days better than full days. When my DD went to nursery (at CM now) she went two full days and upped to a full week over a few weeks. She was described as 'a bit teary' which basically means she wS a screaming nightmare for a while.

I'd say more half days is better.

starlight1234 Mon 24-Feb-14 21:20:18

I do have one baby once a week and it took her far longer than all the other children I have had to settle in...

I would also recommend at least 2 1/2 days

Littlefish Mon 24-Feb-14 21:21:40

Definitely go for 2 x half days, or a whole day and a half day each week if you can.

eeyore12 Mon 24-Feb-14 21:26:28

More half days is def better, which is why most nurseries have a min policy of two sessions (some will only do a min of two full days a week) it is for the child's benefit so they settle/ get used to it quicker. Having worked in child care for the last 20 yrs, I would suggest two full days a week and days together if poss, or at least one full day and one half day.

Also at that age it will take them longer to settle anyway as they are going through the whole stranger awareness/ is mummy coming back thing. The hardest age to settle a child in child care is around 10-12 months because of this but it can be done just takes time and understanding on everyone's part. Can you stay with him for the first session so he sees that it is ok to play there/with the cm as you are talking to her etc, them stay for a little but the second time before popping out for say a hour. Remember to say goodbye and you will be back, don't just slip out as it doesn't teach them that when you say bye you will be back, they just think you have vanished and will panic even more.

Good luck I am sure it will all go fine and the different toys will be a big help!

busyDays Tue 25-Feb-14 19:11:51

I agree with the others, I would not do 1 day a week for such a long period of time. It could actually make the whole settling-in process far more difficult and drawn out. I would wait until about 2-3 weeks before you go back to work before starting any settling-in and then do a couple of half days a week.

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